Your inside track to becoming a proehlfessional athlete
Earlier this week, former Cardinal/Seahawk/Bear/Ram/Panther/Colt receiver Ricky Proehl opened Ricky Proehl’s Proehlific Park Youth Sports Complex in Greensboro, NC. Jeezum-crow, that’s a long name. Is it located anywhere near Al Harrington’s Wacky Waving Inflatable Arm-Flailing Tube-Man Emporium and Warehouse?
Note the use of the word “Proehlific.” I tend to look askance at any product which describes itself using a neologism based on the product name (i.e. Swifferiffic, Fergalicious, Schweppervescence). But in the interests of preserving the endangered species that is the white wide receiver, I pledge my unconditional support to this effort. Don Beebes don’t just grown on trees, y’know.
Mister Proehl, you are hereby invested with the duty of producing the next Ed McCafferey or Drew Bennett. Judging by this curriculum, you are up to the task:
![[badge]](http://cdn.ksk.uproxx.com/wp-content/themes/default/images/100121_FOXmsnBadge_200x50.gif)
June 5th, 2008 at 3:35 pm
Has a white guy ever won the Biletnikoff Award?
June 5th, 2008 at 3:47 pm
Simpsons did i….. no wait.
June 5th, 2008 at 3:48 pm
Has a white guy ever been nominated for the Biletnikoff Award?
/fixed
June 5th, 2008 at 3:52 pm
I am waiting for the Leonard Little Camp for Drunk Drivers Killing People and getting Little punishment…
June 5th, 2008 at 3:59 pm
I’m waiting for the Nate Newton School of Interstate Commerce.
June 5th, 2008 at 4:01 pm
Is there no Balls Deep today?
June 5th, 2008 at 4:09 pm
You forgot about Welkaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhh!
June 5th, 2008 at 4:17 pm
- Work Ethic and Determination 110
– Chrebetter Living 201
June 5th, 2008 at 4:18 pm
@denver
It was yesterday.
June 5th, 2008 at 4:20 pm
Thanks Naptown!
June 5th, 2008 at 4:23 pm
This post is Flubberific.
June 5th, 2008 at 4:42 pm
Don Beebe’s claim to fame: Making white people look even dorkier with that weird helmet guard thingy.
June 5th, 2008 at 4:49 pm
Yeah, Beebe looked like Gazoo the Green Martian from the Flintstones.
June 5th, 2008 at 4:49 pm
He would still be the #1 WR on the Bears this year.
June 5th, 2008 at 4:51 pm
+1 Gino
Every time he was tackled, I expected his helmet to do that bobble-head thing.
June 5th, 2008 at 5:02 pm
Speaking of Beebe, he made Leon Lett look like an asshole in that Super Bowl. So Lett got humiliated by a guy who looks one of Fred Flintstone’s schizophrenic hallucinations.
June 5th, 2008 at 5:17 pm
I’m waiting for the Nate Newton School of Interstate Commerce
+100 for that one Otto. What a friggin’ idiot.
At least he’s on the straight and narrow path now. Just hoping his son doesn’t become a drug mule one day.
June 5th, 2008 at 5:30 pm
That may be the first time “narrow” has ever been used to describe Nate Newton.
June 5th, 2008 at 5:31 pm
HEIGH-OOOOO!
June 5th, 2008 at 5:35 pm
Fact: BDD was the ad wizard who discovered Schweppervescence.
June 5th, 2008 at 5:37 pm
which makes him roughly 87 years old.
June 5th, 2008 at 5:38 pm
He’s also full of Wesson-ality.
June 5th, 2008 at 5:51 pm
He’s crumbelieveable
June 5th, 2008 at 6:00 pm
Neologism? Isn’t that when the dude from the Matrix jacks off on the floor?
/gross
June 5th, 2008 at 6:01 pm
That must be in the director’s cut.
June 5th, 2008 at 6:02 pm
How to execute accetable dance moves while on a parade float.
June 5th, 2008 at 6:06 pm
Mark Madsen will be a guest lecturer.
June 5th, 2008 at 6:23 pm
GT and UU: Well, it’s named after…
June 5th, 2008 at 7:45 pm
Beebe’s also known for the head bounce:
http://youtube.com/watch?v=Fu0ihzhCkkk
June 5th, 2008 at 8:03 pm
Note the use of the word “Proehlific.” I tend to look askance at any product which describes itself using a neologism based on the product name
Look, “Proehlific” is a perfectly cromulent word.
June 5th, 2008 at 8:11 pm
At least he didn’t call his fan(s) “the Proehletariat”. That has to count for something.
June 5th, 2008 at 8:31 pm
Or the Gramatica Family Dance School
June 5th, 2008 at 9:48 pm
Beebe’s noble spirit embiggens us all.
June 5th, 2008 at 10:10 pm
Wait a sec, wasn’t it Mark Kelso who had that ridiculous Gazoo helmet? It wasn’t Steve Tasker or Jim Kelly. I’d look it up myself, but you see, I’m lazy, a little buzzed and I don’t care a whole lot about the Buffalo Bills.
June 5th, 2008 at 10:37 pm
The Bills were 4 time losers so fuck dem homos. But Proehl is scrumtrulescent.
/Cowboys fan hatin’ on Beebe 13 years later
June 5th, 2008 at 10:52 pm
Gazoo would say Gino is no dum-dum.
June 5th, 2008 at 11:21 pm
Bill Schroeder will be in attendance, however, he will be cleaning the toilets.
June 6th, 2008 at 9:42 am
It was mark kelso, not don beebe.
Don Beebe
Mark Kelso
Both white, goofy, so I suppose I understand.
June 6th, 2008 at 10:08 am
Beebe and Kelso both wore the ProCap.
and just for old times sake…
http://www2.jsonline.com/packer/arc/image/0117/cbeebebill117.jpg
June 6th, 2008 at 12:34 pm
African American? Hail a cab!
That is easily my favorite use for a wacky waving inflatable arm flailing tube man.
June 6th, 2008 at 12:45 pm
So both Beebe and Kelso wore those crazy Gazoo helmets? Wow. OJ, miraclous recoveries from spinal cord injuries, Canadian invaders, those helmets: weird shit is afoot in the Buffalo Bills organization.
June 6th, 2008 at 2:09 pm
Sometimes this site produces something amazing (like when hines went to the zoo). this is one of those times.