Uncompromising Suckers of Goat Ass
Dear USGA,
What the fuck? From Friday through Sunday fans on the east coast were able to watch Tiger play the Open in primetime, and now you’re just fucking us in the ass. Some people can’t stand the idea of an anti-climactic 18-hole playoff to settle the tournament, but fuck, I’m not one to complain about such things. One thing I am wont to complain about is an 18-hole playoff played at a time that guarantees my 8-5 ass won’t see a single blade of that badass kikuya.
You need to man the fuck up and tell NBC that shit needs to be on after work. I know that Jeff Zucker has a hard-on for all of those households in middle America that are clamoring for their night of American Gladiators and Nashville Star, but fuck those people. Would the advertisers even care if those piece of shit shows were preempted for some primetime Tiger? Fans of golf buy new kitchens, planes, and all of the other expensive shit made by NBC’s parent company. Fans of shitty third-rate reality programming spend their disposable income on lottery tickets, Bonnie Raitt albums, and WrestleMania tickets. To whom should you really be catering?
In the end, the USGA and NBC should ask themselves, “What would Russert do?” I think the answer is clear.
Yours in Christ,
Maj
Tags: Elitism is fun, Fuck U SGA, Goat Ass, I miss Tim Russert, KSK off topic, Unsilent Majority, Why do I know the name Bonnie Raitt?
June 16th, 2008 at 10:43 am
Dear Maj,
Go to a fucking bar like the rest of us.
Sincerely,
HoC
ps – you’re of course right, but this is a perfect excuse to go to a bar instead of working….
June 16th, 2008 at 10:48 am
You have a job Maj?
June 16th, 2008 at 10:51 am
8-to-5? Are you pulling a double shift at Denny’s?
Table six needs more mustard, by the way.
June 16th, 2008 at 10:53 am
Wow. Maj is becoming a whiny fuck like Ufford. That is sad.
June 16th, 2008 at 10:59 am
Once you get table 6 their mustard, check out
usopen.com or
http://broadband.espn.go.com/espn360/index_nonaff
and go burn up company bandwidth
If they wanted me happy today, they’d let me stay at home to watch this…Then again, if the wife/kids weren’t home today, I’d work at home and my internet connection would be down for about 5 hours today – damn, hate when that happens.
By the way, I’m still waiting for my Ice Tea refill.
June 16th, 2008 at 10:59 am
dvr/tivo that shit. And then just avoid the internet and everyone you know until you get home.
June 16th, 2008 at 11:04 am
I fully plan on watching online until it slows the internet down to a slow trickle.
June 16th, 2008 at 11:08 am
@UM – Yea sorry about that. Trying to update my collection of big sausage pizza on company time.
June 16th, 2008 at 11:08 am
Also is it too much to ask for NBC to broadcast a major golf tournament in HD? Anyone else have that problem, or is my cable company sanctioning my high def due to the innappropriate language I used with customer service last month?
June 16th, 2008 at 11:14 am
I will be watching every shot at usopen.com. The webcast has been awesome.
June 16th, 2008 at 11:25 am
How many sit ups do you think Rocco can do?
June 16th, 2008 at 11:29 am
If you can’t watch golf today, just stare at the nearest wall. It’s about as exciting, and just as white.
June 16th, 2008 at 11:36 am
I’m HD-less until my chick’s crappy Dish Network contrsct expires in November…seriously Chazz, no HD this past weekend? Or was it just that crappy full-frame 480p “HD” that ESPN tries to pass off?
Either way, sounds shitty.
June 16th, 2008 at 11:37 am
@UM, got nothin’ but admiration and respect for you…well respect anyway (you are a Redskins fan after all), but shouldn’t you be heeding your own advice?
KSK is a humor site dedicated solely to the NFL. Have you written something about another sport that you think we should see? Fuck off.
You’re sure we’ll like it anyway? No, seriously: FUCK. OFF.
/goes back to working for the man
June 16th, 2008 at 11:39 am
@porky1: my 3 year old Phillips TV is dying a slow death (letterbox just at the top of the screen) so the wife says – looks like we’re going to have to get a flat screen HDTV in here before we can invite anyone over.
/life is good
June 16th, 2008 at 11:48 am
jackin’ you have a good woman. I mean, so do I…she decided we needed an HD projector rather than a small flat screen. Problem is, her Dish contract is so shitty we don’t want to throw any more money at them than it takes to get HBO and the DVR box. So until it runs out, we only have one box, stuck in the living room. Well, the projector’s only in the den. Which means I’ve been having to watch the NBA Finals on a 100-inch screen off a 6-year-old VCR hooked up to fucking rabbit ears. I mean, it totally brings back memories of watching big screen sports at Pizza Hut when I was 10, but fuck nostalgia, I want my goddamn HD. At least the projector upconverts a little so it doesn’t look like the screen is smudged with Vaseline.
/pointlessly long rant
June 16th, 2008 at 11:49 am
jackin’- that’s the point of the “ksk off-topic” tag.
June 16th, 2008 at 11:50 am
@UM: I’m clearly blind and stupid. Thanks for the clarification.
June 16th, 2008 at 11:55 am
@ porky – do not forget the tin foil on the rabbit ears to clear up the snowy images.
June 16th, 2008 at 12:00 pm
@Dan – No, these are the new-fangled rabbit ears from Big Lots that have an AC outlet. I bitch, but they work surprisingly good for 90-year old technology that will be completely, uselessly obsolete in a year.
I only wear the tinfoil on my head.
June 16th, 2008 at 1:38 pm
What’s wrong with Bonnie Raitt
June 16th, 2008 at 2:05 pm
Major Major Major Major approves of the KSK Off-Topic tag.
June 16th, 2008 at 2:38 pm
3rd rate reality TeeVee fans can’t afford no Wrestlemania tickets! Shit they ain’t even afford it on PPV!?
June 16th, 2008 at 2:42 pm
it’s for the better… golf is for fags anyway.
June 16th, 2008 at 3:40 pm
[...] Cheer up, Maj. It’s right there for you. Tags: Rocco Mediate, Tiger-Woods, U.S.-Open // SHARETHIS.addEntry({ title: “Awesomeness of the day: USOpen.com”, url: “http://www.wearethepostmen.com/2008/06/16/awesomeness-of-the-day-usopencom/” }); var disqus_url = ‘http://www.wearethepostmen.com/2008/06/16/awesomeness-of-the-day-usopencom/ ‘; var disqus_title = ‘Awesomeness of the day: USOpen.com’; var disqus_message = ‘Live streaming video of the open playoff, no commercials … awesome. this has been embraced by myself, tons of friends, and even several of my co-workers, and if you knew how unusual it is to openly talk about streaming internet sports in our office, you’d know. The internet blows me away sometimes.%0ACheer up, Maj. It’s […]%0A’; View the entire comment thread. [...]
June 16th, 2008 at 4:10 pm
i hope you realize that they’re going into extra holes now. tiger pulled it off, once again, with a crucial birdie.
you hate me.
June 16th, 2008 at 4:11 pm
… mediate was leading even par and tiger was +1 after the 14th hole all the way through the 18th, when tiger pulled off a birdie. now it’s sudden death!! and i’m supposed to be getting ready for work…
June 16th, 2008 at 4:12 pm
**sorry, right after the 15th through the 18th hole. my bad.
June 16th, 2008 at 4:31 pm
Wow, watched the whole thing online at work. It was choppy as hell, but I didn’t miss much. Still, that shit belongs on primetime.
June 16th, 2008 at 4:58 pm
Maj is just upset because he isn’t eligible to post this on White Whine.
January 18th, 2009 at 8:30 am
IwuwLO hi! how you doin?