Is this the coolest fackin’ Hawndah you’ve ever seen or what? LIVE FREE OR FACKIN’ DIE! That’s how we fackin’ roll in Porchmuth, New Hampchahhhhh, ya fackin’ anklegrabbahs! Can you find a tattoo pahhhluh over in Mass? No! Ya gawtta came to ow-uh fackin’ state!

FACK YOU! Welkah fan far life!

Special thanks to reader Barry O, who is very handsome and deserves some sort of coital compensation for his efforts.