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No One Must Ever Find Out About My Secret Japanese Fish Fighting Ring

Now that I’m the new quarterback in Atlanta, no one must know that I train Japanese Bettas and have them fight for my amusement.

Oh, society may shun such dangerous activity. But I cannot resist the beauty and majesty of these noble creatures. Fighting is at the very core of their being! Can’t anyone understand that?

Perhaps I should shut down Ill-Timed Information Aquarium. Maybe…

No!

Never!

This is my culture, dammit! It’s part of my Chestnut Hill breeding. Now fight, you wonderful, mysterious fish, FIGHT! Begin your dance of death!

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This entry was posted on Monday, May 5th, 2008 at 6:02 am and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

11 Responses to “No One Must Ever Find Out About My Secret Japanese Fish Fighting Ring”

  1. Mike Says:
    May 5th, 2008 at 7:20 am

    Ill-Timed Information Aquarium

    Well-done, sir.

  2. Otto Man Says:
    May 5th, 2008 at 7:53 am

    Lt. Frank Drebben knows that fish’s weak spot.

  3. bd Says:
    May 5th, 2008 at 8:50 am

    Those damned Chestnut Hill miscreants. That whole area does nothing but breed lawyers and gadabouts.

  4. ciarannh Says:
    May 5th, 2008 at 9:03 am

    I heard Matt Ryan, some years ago, also placed a bee and a wasp into a jar and then shook it.

  5. Unsilent Majority Says:
    May 5th, 2008 at 9:48 am

    placed a bee and a wasp into a jar and then shook it.

    how could a person fit in a jar with a bee?

  6. Otto Man Says:
    May 5th, 2008 at 10:27 am

    how could a person fit in a jar with a bee?

    If you can’t answer a question like that, Maj, you’ll never get made Head Bee Guy.

  7. Grimey Says:
    May 5th, 2008 at 10:37 am

    I’m placing my dough on Lightning, becuase it’s says here he’s a sure thing…

    AND THE ODDS ARE FIVE-TO-FOOOOOUR!

  8. NC Wahoo Says:
    May 5th, 2008 at 10:54 am

    Ryan: Nemo was a bitch

  9. king of the herculoids Says:
    May 5th, 2008 at 11:06 am

    someone think of the children, please, someone think of the children.

    dirty houligans in chestnut hill…

    actually those fights are cool as hell, saw some in college…

  10. Gino Tourettsa Says:
    May 5th, 2008 at 12:43 pm

    I was gonna make a “Naked Gun” reference, but Otto Man beat me to it. Fuck it. “Must kill Papschmeer”.

  11. awkward boner Says:
    May 5th, 2008 at 1:55 pm

    Please note: beta fish fighting is not as exciting as advertised

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