NERDGASMIC!
05.15.08Shutdown Corner has gameplay video of Madden ’09, not due out until fucking August because fuck me, that’s why. Could do without “The Power and the Glory” shit. Normally I disdain people that get obsessARE THOSE NEW PLAYER ANIMATIONS AND CAMERA ANGLES!? Cause, really, it’s just a game and FUCK RANDY MOSS IS DOING THE SOULJA BOY DANCE! I’ve got more important things to do than I WONDER WHAT RATING RASHARD MENDENHALL GETS? HE BETTER BE ABLE TO BREAK SOME GAT DAMN TACKLES!


Since I just commented in the wrong thread…
…BRING BACK NFL BLITZ! Fuck you NFL and NFLPA for your monopoly-liscening douchebaggery. I have no problem with Madden, but my desire to choke-slam Wes Welker and not have it called “pass interference” remains unquenched. Why aren’t people more pissed off about this?
Ok, it’s not 10 picks, but fuck it, this is a day old. I have no idea how “The Jungle” by Upton Sinclair fell this low, but what a steal. I especially love how Sinclair brings in a character to prove a point in favor of socialism, refuses to develop said character for seven chapters, and brings him back when it’s politically convenient. What a fucking hack.
I think my 10th grade english teacher made us read this because she was a militant vegetarian. Nice try bitch, I’m going to eat a roast beef sandwich now. Cheers.
@Jack Donaghy’s Hairsuit
A+ for that comment.
Fuck Madden, fuck EA, fuck the uniform editor that changes the pants color when you switch the helmet stripe, and fuck all those 4-eyed cocksuckers until they bring back MVP Baseball.
wait.Shockey actually gets a catch?
Any truth to the rumor that the official title is “Madden ’08: Easier than Getting Laid”?
@ Jujrock:
normally I’d tell you tell you to get off your moral pedestal, and tell you to stop telling me how to live my life. But its spring, your’re right. Lets all go outside and try to attract some asian girls with our billiard skills and promises of upper class ascension.
To program that game faster?
folks, you need to let your anger go, get out of the house, and find some obligingly slutty asian chicks. just a suggestion.
Every year I go “Great, EA is rehashing Madden again” and I keep promising myself I’m not going to buy it. And then the videos or screenshots come out and I go “Fuck you EA. If you’re going to rape me, at least be gentle.”
I hate EA. I love Madden. And thus, my conundrum.
Did I just see Vince Wilfork drop into coverage? AND no one on the opposing team got a late, dirty hit resulting in a 4-week rehab stint? Utter bullshit.
/billsfansdontletthingsgo
Baht smeos,
that fahkin “1″ has ah pretty gawd damn big ahsterisk ohn it ohn accahnt of the wiiiiikhed terrible clawk officiatin’ in supah bowl foahtee too!!!!
They were 18-0.
I fucking hate it when the humps on NFL say that. No, fuckheads, they were 18-1. And that 1? Kinda important.
Let me get this straight. The Patriots lose the Super Bowl, and then they get to be the home team on the demo version?
Fuck.
GIMMEE YR PEE ROSA
But most importantly: Will it have the new Lucas Oil Stadium and will I have the option to pump in extra crowd noise during key defensive stands?
Moss’s celebration at the end is to gay, even for this site.
Oh shit, I was too slow posting my Tawmmy joke….might I add Porky, that was pretty damn funny
But does this game feature shots of Tawmmy from Quinzee in the stands shouting racist remarks and puking all over himself?…. Because if so….dare I say…..This might be the greatest game ever???
Also, no one’s awaiting this release as much as Ethan Albright. If he’s under 80 this year, there’s gonna be a massacre.
@Porky
I laughed til the Welkah part. Then I really cracked up. Nicely done.
O line still looks like shit . . . so it’s got that going for it.
Really, fuck you, EA. Nobody cares about whatever new useless features you’ve added to the presentation this year. I just want some goddamned pass protection.
@klitz
The ratings don’t go higher than 99
Tawmmy’s Madden rating has ta be at least a hundred and fahteen ovah-all ahr EA Spahts iis a buncha Pats-hating queeahs.
Mahss needs ta be ranked at least ninety-fah.
Welkah gets a fackin infinity symbol next ta all his ratings!
And NBA Live needs ta have Welkah as an unlawkable playah fa the Celts ta break up the dahkie mahnawtahny!
Maybe they can have Joe Buck announce this one, so that I won’t have to get excited about anything that happens.
Well at least we know the Patriots and Randy Moss will be over rated.
mendenhall’s rating goes up 10 points when a defender points a gun at him.
/too soon?
I ended up playing All-Pro 2k8 a lot more than Madden 08. No Madden game’s ever topped NFL 2k5, which I saw running in a video game shop on an old PS2 and looking pretty damn good. Despite not having the HD sheen of Madden 08′s specatacular 15 fumbles and 10 INTs per game replayed on the Madden cam.
Think I need to get over EA and the NFL playing grabass at 2K Sports’ expense? Maybe. Fuck you!
new feature: “pointless” videotaping the opponents sidelines during games.
Dude I think I just filled the cup….
mini dagger, there is SO MUCH potential for a GTA/Madden crossover. I think you just blew my freaking mind.
I’m not getting this game unless it gives your character the ability to pick up a hooker to refill your stamina, then stab her to death to get your money back.
or at least that should be jerramy stevens’ end zone dance
New feature: “Enhanced” scouting reports.
Too soon?
Appears to still have the flaw of not being able to challenge whether a receiver has possession before a fumble. I love me some NFL and I love me some video games, but EA Sports can suck my dick.
/no stats in online created team games for Madden 08, WTF?!
//gigantic fucking nerd
I am actually a little psyched about this one, after not buying last year’s edition for the first time ever (it had just gotten too complicated, too repetitive, and too…not fun). But now that they’ve got the next-gen edition thing down, it should suck less.
Here’s to working from home, dude.
This video is bullshit. There’s no way the traffic would be moving that smoothly at game time.