KSK Commenter Draft: Mixed Drinks
Here at KSK, we’re alcoholics first, bloggers second. Actually, we’re masturbators first, then alcoholics, then football-needy douchebags, and somewhere around 15th or 16th on the list of priorities is blogging.
The point is, most of us are hammered most the time. Hell, I cracked open a bottle of DH Krahn at three o’clock yesterday. You can do these things when you work at home.
Which brings us to today’s commenter draft. Having already “drafted” beer last year — the quotes let you know the pun is cheap and intentional — we turn our attention now to mixed drinks. The premise: for the rest of your life, you can ONLY order the drinks you draft here. It’s a terrifying prospect, the possibility of a summer without mojitos and margaritas, or early NFL games without Bloody Marys, or a Tuesday morning without Mad Dog 20/20 and Sprite.
My first pick: a Manhattan.
And I want it with bourbon, not Canadian whiskey. Easy on the vermouth, served up in a rocks glass. (The only drinks that should be served in a martini glass are martinis, goddammit.)
Your turn. You know the rules: make your selection, then wait ten picks before choosing again. If you’re drafting something archaic or little-known, by all means, share a recipe. We’re always looking for new and fabulous ways to get tight.
NOTE: We do mean MIXED drinks. Hey, you like Johnnie Walker Blue Label “mixed” with ice cubes? You’re very clever, fuck off.
Tags: captain caveman, ksk commenter drafts, wow now I want to start drinking
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:19 am
Red Snapper. Lots of Crown please
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:20 am
Took my fucking drink, Ufford!
Fuggit, I’ll take a gin martini up with olives, nice and dry.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:20 am
/75 years-old
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:20 am
Rum and Coke, shitload of lime.
If you draft and Alabama Slammer, I punch your cock.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:22 am
Crown Royal and Ginger ale. It’s refreshing, it’s sweet, and I’m starting to sound like Gollum.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:22 am
Jack and Coke
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:22 am
Oh, and anybody putting ice cubes in their blue label may as well add some splenda while they’re at it.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:23 am
Captain and Sprite. My sleeper is gonna be on the board allllll day.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:24 am
Very Easy. Vodka and ice
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:24 am
Woodford and coke, assuming different brand bourbons and coke are separate picks, which they goddamn well better be.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:24 am
Plastic bottle rum and Mountain Dew
Ahhh…memories of my youth
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:24 am
Mojito.
I don’t think it’s a gay drink.
Mo-heeee-tooo.
“Every Christmas my Mom would get a fresh goose, for gooseburgers, and my Dad would whip up his special eggnog out of bourbon and ice cubes.”
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:25 am
Mexican Martini… three of those and I always end up with a sombero on
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:25 am
7&7. Also cannon fire is an idiot.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:25 am
I’ll start off with a Grand Marnier sidecar martini
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:25 am
Tom Collins made with Tanqueray.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:25 am
ecto cooler - 2 parts belvedere, 1 part midori and 1 part pineapple juice. perfect for summer or winter, breakfast or dinner.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:26 am
Bloody Mary
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:26 am
Dickel and Coke… that’s a Tennessee Smoothie
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:26 am
gin and tonic with a lime.
great summer drink
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:27 am
Beer and Clamato juice. For those unfamiliar with Clamato juice, it’s like tomato juice, with clam juice in it.
I realize this could be polarizing.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:27 am
Dirty martini with Skyy 90. Done.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:27 am
Margarita on the rocks.
patron, mix, rocks, gm floater, salt.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:27 am
Vodka (Belvedere) and tonic
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:27 am
white russian.
dude.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:27 am
Three Wise Men in a highball no ice.
and
/dead.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:27 am
Vanilla Stoli and Ginger Ale - the summer drink of the big city
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:28 am
Blue Goose.
Martini with Grey Goose + Vermouth + Blue Cheese Stuffed Olives.
It has Vodka AND CHEESE. IN THE DRINK.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:28 am
Maker’s and ginger.
This is what a daytime buzz is made of.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:28 am
Oh LORD now I want a drink.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:29 am
SMPERK stole my next pick… enjoy the mickey Jackie Treehorn slipped in your Russian you bastard…
I’ll take a morning-after-special: SCREWDRIVER
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:29 am
Mint Julep
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:30 am
Boo, UM, I take umbrage with your pick… a real marg made with good tequila, triple sec, and a splash of lime served up is infinitely better than anything with mix.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:30 am
As the bourbon run continues, I’ll go ahead and settle for a Jack and Ginger.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:30 am
heh. Umbrage. WTF is that?
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:31 am
white peach bellini made with prosecco
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:31 am
Excellent choice, Jim U.
“It does not require, as a garnish, a televised horse race and a bunch of Yankees doing Foghorn Leghorn imitations.”
I’ll take a Negroni.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:32 am
Dammit, Uncle Jesse. Shouldn’t you be ordering something made with moonshine?
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:32 am
Mexican Screwdriver
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:32 am
Whiskey sour.
Wake up in a stranger’s house with your pants off? Sure, why not!
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:32 am
and jack daniel’s is NOT bourbon
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:33 am
futuremrs- yeah yeah, i don’t know why i said mix, you’re right. but triple sec can sec my balls
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:34 am
Mike Wilbon selects the Kir Royale and laughs at the rest of you.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:34 am
Gin & Tonic, with Hendricks gin and a slice of cucumber instead of lime. Mmmm… gin-soaked vegetables…
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:34 am
Blech I hate mixed drinks. Too fruity and sweet. If I must, I’ll take an old-fashioned with good scotch, light on the bitters.
/is cranky old man, apparently
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:34 am
@Jim U.: I may be an idiot, but a mint julep is the worst drink ever. I’d rather drink panther piss.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:34 am
Everclear and lemon lime gatorade?
I guess health insurance is a must this summer.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:34 am
grimey, the whiskey sour was my first drink.
bar mitzvah’s rule!
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:35 am
Jamaican rum punch
4 Cups water
1 Cup lime or lemon juice
3 cups strawberry-flavored syrup
2 cups Wray & Nephew Overproof white rum
That will get your motor going.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:35 am
well done flozell
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:36 am
Gin and Fresca
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:37 am
And waitress, this time… no giggling!
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:37 am
Im going to submit one for the Judges: Snake Bite? Pear cider and Guiness on top? Can I get a ruling on this…
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:38 am
Mai Tai - perfect summertime drink for the gay mafia
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:38 am
and jack daniel’s is NOT bourbon
Ah, a Bluegrass state elitist. I count it as one of the brownest of the browns. But if it’ll make you feel better, Matlock, I’ll stipulate that it’s a “Tennessee whiskey.”
“We had quitters in the Revolution, too. We called them Kentuckians!”
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:39 am
Caipirinha.
Like a Mojito, but 15% more gay!
Also the sugar cane helps the liquor get where it needs to go faster. Biology is interesting.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:39 am
Mai Thai.
And +1 for the ecto cooler. The Hi-C version was the best juice box ever.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:40 am
Rusty Nail.
Best single barrel bourbon, hands down = Blanton’s.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:41 am
Im going to submit one for the Judges: Snake Bite? Pear cider and Guiness on top? Can I get a ruling on this…
Yes: you are gay.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:41 am
Gotta go with Absolut Citron & Sprite.
It tastes just like sprite!
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:41 am
heh, not a bluegrass state elitist, although my hometown was about 15 miles from the KY border and 35 from TN (Big Stone Gap, VA represent! hometown of over- then under- then overrated Jones brothers RBs, Thomas and Julius). for my next pick i select the French 75 (champagne, gin, lemon juice, sugar)
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:42 am
Long Island Iced Tea
YOINK
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:42 am
Here’s another for ya, UM:
Moscow Mule
1 3/4 oz vodka
1/2 oz lime juice
ginger beer (NOT ginger ale)
lime wedge for garnish
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:42 am
UM… I hear ya on the GM floater. Some call it sacrilege. I call it fucking delicious.
Otto… moonshine is give but it doesn’t go well in daiquiris.
Which brings me to my next pick… a daiquiri. Not a fucking fruit smoothie but a real daiquri–rum, lime, sugar, ice.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:42 am
Vodka Tonic
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:42 am
also, my two picks have involved sparkling wines, so i might be gay now
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:43 am
Grey Goose and cranberry.
No, it’s not my period.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:44 am
Ooh ooh! French martini. It’s the only fruity drink I like. Vodka, Chambord, pineapple juice, and a splash of champagne (only if you’re feeling decadent, dahling). Sugared rim and everything. If I were the kind of girl that had a sugar daddy, that is what I would drink all day every day.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:44 am
Yes Freak, yes you are
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:44 am
I don’t know anything but beer, whiskey sour, and whiskey on the rocks. Sigh. I feel like Doc Rivers in the fourth quarter…
/sorry for the cheap shot futuremrs.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:45 am
Uncle Jesse: a real daiquiri was Hemingway’s favorite drink. Bravo.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:45 am
flozell- ginger beer… wow! good one
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:45 am
Tarnished Apples. As long as my boyfriend tolerates finding the apple cider to make them, I’ll drink them.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:45 am
Whoops, my bad. My blackberry doesn’t refresh fast enough. I’ll take a Midori Sour in honor of the ecto cooler.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:45 am
Olde English 800 with a sunken shot ‘o cheap Kentucky Nihilism! Drink’n….at least it’s an ethos
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:45 am
Whoops. Otto… moonshine is A GIVEN but it doesn’t go well in daiquiris.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:46 am
Rob Roy.
Scotch > Rye.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:47 am
Socaid - Cherry Kool Aid and 100 proof Southern Comfort. Easily the best way to black out prior to 8am.
“Socaid with me if it’s socaid with you”
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:48 am
Knob Creek, splash of coke if I must.
And for those counting, that’s another Bourbon off the table (you can keep your Tennessee Whiskey).
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:48 am
Icepick;
3 parts goose
1 part sweet tea
Lots of ice
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:48 am
Is an Irish Carbomb a mixed drink (Jameson’s and Guinness)? If so, then count me ALL IN.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:48 am
^Oh, also the best way to ruin a lot of upholstery.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:49 am
Moscow Mule. Must be in copper mug with plenty of ice.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:49 am
Kirk Herbstreit selects: Alabama Slammer - topped with selection of three of the Tide’s least broken-in cheerleaders.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:50 am
Jackin, I say it is. Just because you have to drink it in a matter of seconds doesn’t mean it’s not mixed.
/Jealous of the pick
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:50 am
Vodka Lemonade
fresh squeezed lemons + simple syrup + vodka + ice = mmmm
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:50 am
Grape juice and vodka. Tastes like cough syrup!
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:52 am
Hmm, I managed to fail to search for Maker’s correctly and have to repick. Second choice: “Berry Breeze”: Alizé Red Passion, strawberry vodka, cranberry juice & lemon-lime soda. Yes, I like fruity drinks.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:52 am
Original Sazerac.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:53 am
Ooh, does a Jagerbomb count? I had one of those that one time my cool brother let me hang out with him. I hear they’re rather popular. I’ll pick that if it counts.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:53 am
Miles O’Toole - you need to learn to read.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:55 am
Gin and juice. Grapefruit, to be specific.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:55 am
ketel soda with a lemon and a lime. i could drink that every hour on the hour.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:55 am
After a couple of moderate drinks, let’s move into the hardcore:
Four Horsemen:
1 part Bourbon whiskey (Jim Beam)
1 part Tennessee whiskey (Jack Daniel’s)
1 part Scotch whisky (Johnnie Walker Red)
1 part Tequila (Jose Cuervo) or Irish whiskey (Jameson Irish Whiskey)
(licks lips)
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:55 am
Flaming Dr. Pepper:
1 Pint of cheap beer (preferably ice house or red dog)
3/4 shot of root beer schnaaps
1/4 shot of Bicardi 151
pour the schnaaps in a shot glass, then the 151, light it on fire, then drop it in the beer. Actually does taste like Dr. Pepper.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:56 am
Italian coffee = black coffee and amaretto
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:58 am
Flozell - Many much sorry.
Father McCarthy
2 part rum
1 part Vodka
Frozen OJ concentrate
Frozen Limeaid concentrate
Sprite
For some reason this was popular at my CYO picnics.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:58 am
Tom Collins.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:58 am
I ran out of rum once and all I had was moonshine so I came up with a Moonjito.
A Mojito made with lemon flavored moonshine. Yes I do have issues
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:58 am
@J4B: Damn you to hell. That was my next pick. Sigh. I will take Sangria instead. My dad’s sangria is the tits.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:59 am
Licking Toad
2 shots of goose or belve
half of a red bull
splash of blue curacao
taken as a shot
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:59 am
georgi vodka and tang. itll send me right back to college
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:00 am
BTW, I won’t draft this, but my girlfriend does a mean pomegranate martini.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:01 am
A mulled wine, heavy on the cinnamon, and light on the cloves. There we go, off with you lad and look lively.
Thank you Clarence
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:01 am
As a straight bourbon drinker, I may have to trade all my picks in this draft. Mixed drinks are just too sweet, and the non-alcoholic parts only slow down the rush to oblivion. As a result, the only thing I mix my liquor with is the occasional ice cube and a heightened sense of my own attractiveness.
But if this is all the liquor I’m getting for the rest of my life … let’s go full on fruity and fucked-up with a Tequila Sunrise. One, two, three, floor.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:01 am
OK - time for the ghetto drinks…
Thug Passion - Red Alizé and Cristal over ice. If you were trying to get fucked up, then you’ve succeeded my friend.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:01 am
Dark rum, bourbon, splash of cream, shaken lightly and served on the rocks. I think it’s called a Midnight Cowboy… it’s like a White Russian only not so freaking sweet.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:02 am
Stoli and grapefruit.
A must at weddings
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:03 am
@The Lazer: It’s not root beer schnapps, it’s amaretto.
Also, I hate you.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:03 am
Hey Caveman, bite my bag fucker. Chug three snakebites and see how gay you are Gieco-Bitch.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:04 am
@Dickens Cider - That’s one crazy drink - and you are a real drinker.
@smurphette - that’s what I’m here for, pickin’ fast and furious m’lady!
MUHAHAHAHA
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:04 am
Crown and Dr. Pepper. Try it.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:04 am
Jim & Ginger.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:05 am
Glenfiddich and Sprite Zero. When I want to sleep fully clothed with my contacts still in.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:05 am
Vodka Gimlet.
Your move, Mister Bond.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:07 am
Glenfiddich and Sprite Zero.
I hear that pairs well with the Kobe Beef and peanut butter.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:08 am
When I was in Bratislava for a night last fall (don’t ask), I had a drink called a B-52:
- 2 oz. Absinthe
- 2 oz. Bailey’s
-2 oz. Kahlua
Needless to say, I was set for the night.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:10 am
Street Rat — make a Three Wise Men, add Texas Pete hot sauce, rinse and repeat, I never really remember what happens next
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:10 am
My girly drink selection: Southern Nut
Equal parts of Southern Comfort 100, Amaretto, lime juice and pineapple juice.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:10 am
How the hell did Long Island fall this far? $2 on friday nights at a hole in the wall downtown = $10 to get your night started right.
Bailey’s and hot chocolate. Nothing better on a snow day.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:11 am
@Auksyte
Back in aught-three when I was a freshman, ecto cooler was something much different. Mix Pepsi Blue with orange juice, then add a fuckload of vodka. The end result is a neon green concoction that tastes like rainbow sherbet. I got so drunk off it I ended up spending the hours between 3 a.m. and 6 a.m. alternating between puking and shitting while sweating profusely. The next day was the worst day of my life.
/misses the good old days
//wishes they still made Pepsi Blue
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:11 am
Zombie:
1/2 oz. Bacardi 151 proof rum (that’s the one with the fire-retardant cap)
1 oz. pineapple juice
1 oz. orange juice
1/2 oz. apricot brandy
1 tsp. sugar
2 oz. light rum
1 oz. dark rum
1 oz. lime juice
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:11 am
In the US of A, where Absinthe is hard to get, the B-52 is made with Grand Marnier instead.
When I bartended in college, we used to line those up after closing the place down. I’d down two of those with my keys in hand, drive the two miles home just in time for impact. Best bombing run in history.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:12 am
Supersonic Gin and Tonic. Yes the plain gin and tonic is off the board, but this is different.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:12 am
Anything Sandra Lee makes… It’s cocktail time! Then I’ll lay that bitch down on whatever tablescape she happens to be using and do body shots off those huge 40 year old knockers!
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:14 am
@ Jackin
Thanks I try. Flavored moonshine is kind of dangerous, cause you can’t really taste the moonshine….but I digress
Second pick Torpedo Juice: Everclear + Redbull = Me fucked up
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:15 am
Good ol’ boilermaker. Beer with a shot of whiskey.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:15 am
a drink that I’m sure BDD’s fruity high school classmates drank by the gallons:
a Cape Codder
Vodka, Cranberry, and some lime
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:16 am
Skippy Get Naked
- 2 cases of cheap beer
- 2 handles of cheap vodka
- Powdered lemonade
Mix in a cooler with ice, drink, wake up naked.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:16 am
CrabblerK3, Long Island did not fall that far. Big Gay Drew took it a while back.
And long island iced tea = “I want to get drunk really fast and I don’t care what my drink tastes like”
This draft definitely separated the men from the amateurs.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:17 am
kentucky gentleman and rootbeer
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:17 am
Everclear and grape Kool-Aid. Let’s hope the blindness is only temporary.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:17 am
okay, i need to not be gay anymore, so i’ll take the Royal Monster–crown royal + monster energy drink
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:17 am
caribou lou…
3 parts 151, 1.5 part malibu, 5 parts pineapple juice….oh boy
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:18 am
Trashcan Punch/Jungle Juice etc. Gets’em topless every time!
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:19 am
Sarah drinks Stoli Raz
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:19 am
Hop Skip and Go Naked
1 six pack of beer
1 fifth of vodka
1 can of lemonade concentrate
Mix in a cooler and enjoy while shooting off fireworks for 4th of July
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:20 am
And fuck me, I’m 8 picks too late
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:20 am
Gay drink time…
Hpno-tini
But it tastes so gooooooooooooooooood.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:20 am
Nutty Irishman:
1 shot Kahlua
1 Shot Baileys
1 Shot Vodka
1 shot Amaretto/Frangelico
1 shot coffee schnapps
The ultimate Sunday Funday drink, served on the rocks in a highball glass.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:21 am
Yay for bartending in college, Otto Man! Learned all my good drinking habits there… not to mention my ability to be friendly to assholes who don’t deserve it.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:21 am
Nothing gets the night going like a RBV.
Stoli Blueberry and Vodka.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:21 am
Late to the party as always.
I’ll go Mimosa, because mimosas and bagels makes a great breakfast.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:22 am
*stoli blue and redbull.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:22 am
Neon Iguana
In a shaker glass half full of ice
3 oz Captain
3 oz Malibu
1.5 oz Blue Curacao
1.5 oz lime juice
Top off with OJ
It’s a bright greenish-blue color. Tastes great, gets you hammered, just don’t spill it on anything.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:22 am
Hey J4B, I went to a fashion week party in NYC a few years back and that’s what they were serving. In conclusion, if you drink Hypnotinis models will sleep with you.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:22 am
continuing the gay MA drink-fest:
Vodka, Cranberry, Orange Juice, Lime wedge
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:23 am
dark and stormy.
perfect summer drink that no one knows how to make properly.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:24 am
Sailor Jerry Rum and Diet Coke on the rocks.
(If it was straight spirits, I’d draft Old Overholt, neat, but I always show up late for these things.)
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:24 am
Skippy’s
30 pack, handle of cheap vodka, lemonade mix, & ice. Mixed together in a dingy cooler or tub. Sounds gross, but actually tastes good and messes you up.
/hasn’t moved on since college
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:25 am
Redneck Margarita
1 oz Whiskey(I prefer Jack)
1/2 oz Triple Sec
Margarita Mix
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:26 am
Flaming Meaux
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:26 am
@el domingo: Why don’t you enlighten us then?
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:29 am
Yay for bartending in college, Otto Man! Learned all my good drinking habits there… not to mention my ability to be friendly to assholes who don’t deserve it.
Amen to that. Although I was originally a bouncer, so I also learned to tell assholes to go fuck themselves. Two sides of the coin there.
The more I think about it, I bet my aversion to mixed drinks might be rooted in that job, dealing with people who had to have their pet drink made just so. That said, it was nice when the 21st birthday parties rolled in and asked me to give the celebrant a shot of my own choosing. Cement Mixer. Bailey’s with lime juice, so it hardens and gums up when you take it.
Yeah, I was never in charge of cleaning the bathrooms.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:29 am
Mr. Boston vodka & lemonade. Cause you pretentious assholes probably aren’t familiar with Chris Boston.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:30 am
the Mo.
drink a 40 down to the label, refill with a wine cooler.
because it gets you mo’ fucked up is why, and the ingredients are available at bodegas that don’t check ID.
/highschool
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:31 am
@ CuJo
it’s simple but people never get it right
need a dark rum like myers or gosling’s black seal or something like that - pour 1 part that over ice to 4 parts ginger beer (not ale). stir. enjoy
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:32 am
Colorado Bull Dog
1 shot vodka
1 shot Kahlua® coffee liqueur
milk
1 splash Coca-Cola®
In a shaker mix Vodka, Kahlua, and milk. Pour into a rocks glass and add a splash of Coca-Cola.
Gay - Check
Tasty - Check
Me hitting 400 LBS soon - Check
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:32 am
Skippy, the ultimate beach drink:
1 NFL style water cooler
30 rack of Natty Light
1 handle of cheap vodka
1 container of powdered Country Time Pink Lemonade
Mix, drink, and don’t count on doing anything but shitting for two days after.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:32 am
Everclear Roulette: Get enough shotglasses for everyone. Mix a preffered beverage in a cocktail shaker pour cocktail into all glasses but one. Pour 3/4ths everclear into remaining shotglass and fill with cocktail. mix them up so that no one knows which glass has the everclear in it and one by one take turns picking a shot… It will be clearly evident who picks the everclear shot.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:33 am
Effen Black Cherry Vodka and Coke
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:33 am
@futuremrsrickankiel: Well if that’s the case, then keep the Hpnotini’s flowing.
“Of course I’m cultured and independently wealthy.”
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:34 am
Mixing Woodford with coke??? That’s good for a cockpunch.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:35 am
Heh. The shot I always mix for people who want a birthday shot or whatever is the Chocolate Cake. Mix lemon vodka with Frangelico and pour into shot glasses, then take a lemon wedge and cover it with sugar. Pound the shot then suck the sugar out of the lemon… it’s mighty tasty and does, in fact, taste bizarrely like chocolate cake.
In fact, I’ma go ahead and draft that shit, even though I guess technically it’s a slammer and not a mixed drink. I’ve got 5 tasty drinks on my board and a loooong-ass day of work before I can go enjoy any of them. Damn you, KSK!
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:35 am
In the same vein as Crabbler’s but a little stronger. Hot Chocolate and Rumplemintz. NOW there’s nothing better on a cold day.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:36 am
Jackin’, the Irish car bomb I’ve come to know and love is a shot glass filled with half Jameson’s, half Baileys, then dropped into a pint of Guinness and chugged. Tastes like chocolate milk. Yum.
/sorry I’m at work
//and that it’s 9:35 in the morning
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:37 am
Hawaiian Punch aka Red Death
Any drink that combines the alcohol of two drinks (Kamikaze and Alabama Slammmer) into one and always served in a pitcher is the drink for me.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:37 am
Superona:
Drink the neck of a Corona, fill said neck with Bacardi Limon. The limon acts like the lime, and it still drinks like a beer. Deadly.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:38 am
Sparxxdriver. Take a 64 ounce “Mugzilla” from the local convenience store, pour two or three 16 oz. cans of sparx over ice, add a shit load of vodka, and prepare for most of your internal organs to shut down and wake up to a scene that looks straight out of Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas: dismembered mannequin, knife stuck in the wall, couch over turned.
/ my roommate drank this garbage and caused the damage above, I only sampled on occasion, but if it is the only thing I can drink the rest of my life, I want to be as fucked up as possible.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:38 am
Baltimore Zoo. Ballgame. Over.
http://www.drinksmixer.com/drink1026.html
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:38 am
Who’s going to be the next douche to draft Skippy?
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:39 am
No, the perfect beach (and infield of a horse race, in my case, Foxfield) drink is:
Gin Bucket
1 bucket
1 handle cheap gin
2 2L bottles of Fresca
copious amounts of citrus fruit (usually oranges, lemons, and limes) cut into quarters, squeezed into bucket and then tossed in bucket to soak
The proper way to administer this drink is to squirt it into a girl’s mouth with a turkey baster.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:40 am
FMRA - That chocolate cake drink is super gay and tasty.
/doesn’t understand flavor chemistry
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:41 am
Mind Eraser
I know it could be a shot, but it’s still a mixed shot.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:41 am
Lunchbox:
beer, o.j., amaretto
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:43 am
LOL the proper way to administer is to squirt it into a girls mouth…
Awesome
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:45 am
Liquid Heroin shots. Jaeger, Rumpleminze and 151. It’ll make you do stupid shit like pass out at a strip club and then pass out in a slice of pizza. Um, not that I would know anything about that.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:47 am
SoCo and Sprite. We call it the Rhonda Special.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:48 am
Mixing Woodford with coke??? That’s good for a castration.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:50 am
Damn you KSK, I’ve got so much freakin’ work to do before the markets close…but I am somehow compelled to keep drafting…
OK, will draft again after doing some work.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:50 am
olde fashioned.
bourbon
sugar
bitters
cherry
orange
ice
muddle fruit, bitters and sugar. top with ice. add boubon.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:51 am
A Black-Eyed Susan made at the Preakness
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:52 am
The Bumskull: Take a huge cooler, and dump anything and everything that contains alcohol within (essentials: 5th of Everclear, bottle of Andre, case of beer). also include chopped up pineapple, oranges, and bananas. It has the consistency and color of vommit and burns like moonshine on the way down. Surprisingly, it does not taste awful, and two cups make you forget where your legs are.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:53 am
i choose pruno, aka jail wine. tastes like you mande a margarita out of bile, yes. but if nobody goes blind or dies you’re the toast of the cellblock!
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:53 am
Hurricane Punch
This isn’t for the faint of heart, and probably the reason why I won’t live to be 30
Cranberry juice, pineapple juice, light rum, dark rum, amaretto, blue curacao, orange passion fruit, a wedge of lime, a leaf of mint, a squirt of triple sec, a splash of Grand Marnier, a dash of grenadine, a pinch of coconut, a sprinkle of sugar, shaved ice. Oh, and a whole bunch of mescaline.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:54 am
Somebody picked my drink, but they picked the generic version. I’ll assume they have no taste buds and wanted Seagram’s Gin, so I’ll go with Bombay Sapphire and a SPLASH of tonic with a lime.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:55 am
Already ganked the old-fashioned, el domingo, although I prefer them with scotch.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:55 am
Pussies all…
Shot and a beer! The only “mixed” drink that a man can drink and still look himself in the mirror…
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:55 am
The Scarface:
Highball glass
Fill 3/4 with ice
1 shot Rumpleminze
1 shot Bacardi 151
Fill out with half & half
Sounds disgusting, but tastes like the inside of a York peppermint patty and goes down nice and smooth. Sip it and don’t have more than 3, or it will utterly and completely destroy you.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:55 am
Malibu Rum and Diet Coke…Tastes like a vanilla coke…oh so refreshing!
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:56 am
@ futuremrsrickankiel
totally different drink with bourbon.
but props for the pick.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:57 am
The Newark Bum:
MD 20/20, Colt 45, and Boon’s Farm.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:58 am
…and all you people giving recipes for mixes that taste like something else (put in some gasoline, cherry juice, and beer: tastes just like a fudgecicle!) fuck off! If you want something that tastes like a Dr. Pepper, drink Dr. Pepper. If you also want a buzz, hit yourself in the head with a hammer!
May 23rd, 2008 at 12:01 pm
The JD McNugent
1 Pint Black Haus
2 16 Oz Cans Rockstar
1 16 Oz Cranberry-Grape Ocean Spray
Destruction.
May 23rd, 2008 at 12:01 pm
Barkeep! A Cosmopolitan for rusrus!
May 23rd, 2008 at 12:02 pm
Grain alcohol, Goldschlager, and apple juice. My buddy makes it and calls it Apple Pie. He also then used himself as a human bowling ball against 10 empty kegs arranged as, well, as bowling pins.
May 23rd, 2008 at 12:02 pm
P