KSK Commenter Draft: Mixed Drinks


Here at KSK, we’re alcoholics first, bloggers second. Actually, we’re masturbators first, then alcoholics, then football-needy douchebags, and somewhere around 15th or 16th on the list of priorities is blogging.

The point is, most of us are hammered most the time. Hell, I cracked open a bottle of DH Krahn at three o’clock yesterday. You can do these things when you work at home.

Which brings us to today’s commenter draft. Having already “drafted” beer last year — the quotes let you know the pun is cheap and intentional — we turn our attention now to mixed drinks. The premise: for the rest of your life, you can ONLY order the drinks you draft here. It’s a terrifying prospect, the possibility of a summer without mojitos and margaritas, or early NFL games without Bloody Marys, or a Tuesday morning without Mad Dog 20/20 and Sprite.

My first pick: a Manhattan.

And I want it with bourbon, not Canadian whiskey. Easy on the vermouth, served up in a rocks glass. (The only drinks that should be served in a martini glass are martinis, goddammit.)

Your turn. You know the rules: make your selection, then wait ten picks before choosing again. If you’re drafting something archaic or little-known, by all means, share a recipe. We’re always looking for new and fabulous ways to get tight.

NOTE: We do mean MIXED drinks. Hey, you like Johnnie Walker Blue Label “mixed” with ice cubes? You’re very clever, fuck off.

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338 Responses to “KSK Commenter Draft: Mixed Drinks”

  1. BigTravATX Says:

    Red Snapper. Lots of Crown please

  2. Unsilent Majority Says:

    Took my fucking drink, Ufford!

    Fuggit, I’ll take a gin martini up with olives, nice and dry.

  3. Unsilent Majority Says:

    /75 years-old

  4. Big Daddy Drew Says:

    Rum and Coke, shitload of lime.

    If you draft and Alabama Slammer, I punch your cock.

  5. whowillsexmutombo? Says:

    Crown Royal and Ginger ale. It’s refreshing, it’s sweet, and I’m starting to sound like Gollum.

  6. FSJr. Says:

    Jack and Coke

  7. Unsilent Majority Says:

    Oh, and anybody putting ice cubes in their blue label may as well add some splenda while they’re at it.

  8. John John The Bastard Says:

    Captain and Sprite. My sleeper is gonna be on the board allllll day.

  9. cannon fire Says:

    Very Easy. Vodka and ice

  10. Dale Says:

    Woodford and coke, assuming different brand bourbons and coke are separate picks, which they goddamn well better be.

  11. Chocolate Construda Says:

    Plastic bottle rum and Mountain Dew

    Ahhh…memories of my youth

  12. Ben Says:

    Mojito.

    I don’t think it’s a gay drink.

    Mo-heeee-tooo.

    “Every Christmas my Mom would get a fresh goose, for gooseburgers, and my Dad would whip up his special eggnog out of bourbon and ice cubes.”

  13. BigTravATX Says:

    Mexican Martini… three of those and I always end up with a sombero on

  14. Jim U. Says:

    7&7. Also cannon fire is an idiot.

  15. jackin'4beats Says:

    I’ll start off with a Grand Marnier sidecar martini

  16. smurphette Says:

    Tom Collins made with Tanqueray.

  17. Auksyte Says:

    ecto cooler – 2 parts belvedere, 1 part midori and 1 part pineapple juice. perfect for summer or winter, breakfast or dinner.

  18. Caveman Captain Says:

    Bloody Mary

  19. August West Says:

    Dickel and Coke… that’s a Tennessee Smoothie

  20. Upstate Underdog Says:

    gin and tonic with a lime.

    great summer drink

  21. Gourmet Spud Says:

    Beer and Clamato juice. For those unfamiliar with Clamato juice, it’s like tomato juice, with clam juice in it.

    I realize this could be polarizing.

  22. futuremrsrickankiel Says:

    Dirty martini with Skyy 90. Done.

  23. Unsilent Majority Says:

    Margarita on the rocks.

    patron, mix, rocks, gm floater, salt.

  24. Dale Says:

    Vodka (Belvedere) and tonic

  25. smperk Says:

    white russian.

    dude.

  26. average at best Says:

    Three Wise Men in a highball no ice.

    and

    /dead.

  27. jackin'4beats Says:

    Vanilla Stoli and Ginger Ale – the summer drink of the big city

  28. Ben Says:

    Blue Goose.

    Martini with Grey Goose + Vermouth + Blue Cheese Stuffed Olives.

    It has Vodka AND CHEESE. IN THE DRINK.

  29. Uncle Jesse Says:

    Maker’s and ginger.

    This is what a daytime buzz is made of.

  30. futuremrsrickankiel Says:

    Oh LORD now I want a drink.

  31. BigTravATX Says:

    SMPERK stole my next pick… enjoy the mickey Jackie Treehorn slipped in your Russian you bastard…

    I’ll take a morning-after-special: SCREWDRIVER

  32. Jim U. Says:

    Mint Julep

  33. futuremrsrickankiel Says:

    Boo, UM, I take umbrage with your pick… a real marg made with good tequila, triple sec, and a splash of lime served up is infinitely better than anything with mix.

  34. Otto Man Says:

    As the bourbon run continues, I’ll go ahead and settle for a Jack and Ginger.

  35. futuremrsrickankiel Says:

    heh. Umbrage. WTF is that?

  36. Freak Power in '08 Says:

    white peach bellini made with prosecco

  37. Ben Says:

    Excellent choice, Jim U.

    “It does not require, as a garnish, a televised horse race and a bunch of Yankees doing Foghorn Leghorn imitations.”

    I’ll take a Negroni.

  38. Otto Man Says:

    Dammit, Uncle Jesse. Shouldn’t you be ordering something made with moonshine?

  39. JCSC Says:

    Mexican Screwdriver

  40. Grimey Says:

    Whiskey sour.

    Wake up in a stranger’s house with your pants off? Sure, why not!

  41. Freak Power in '08 Says:

    and jack daniel’s is NOT bourbon

  42. Unsilent Majority Says:

    futuremrs- yeah yeah, i don’t know why i said mix, you’re right. but triple sec can sec my balls

  43. Unsilent Majority Says:

    Mike Wilbon selects the Kir Royale and laughs at the rest of you.

  44. Flozell Says:

    Gin & Tonic, with Hendricks gin and a slice of cucumber instead of lime. Mmmm… gin-soaked vegetables…

  45. futuremrsrickankiel Says:

    Blech I hate mixed drinks. Too fruity and sweet. If I must, I’ll take an old-fashioned with good scotch, light on the bitters.

    /is cranky old man, apparently

  46. cannon fire Says:

    @Jim U.: I may be an idiot, but a mint julep is the worst drink ever. I’d rather drink panther piss.

  47. average at best Says:

    Everclear and lemon lime gatorade?

    I guess health insurance is a must this summer.

  48. Unsilent Majority Says:

    grimey, the whiskey sour was my first drink.

    bar mitzvah’s rule!

  49. jackin'4beats Says:

    Jamaican rum punch

    4 Cups water
    1 Cup lime or lemon juice
    3 cups strawberry-flavored syrup
    2 cups Wray & Nephew Overproof white rum

    That will get your motor going.

  50. Unsilent Majority Says:

    well done flozell

  51. Matt Says:

    Gin and Fresca

  52. Grimey Says:

    And waitress, this time… no giggling!

  53. BigTravATX Says:

    Im going to submit one for the Judges: Snake Bite? Pear cider and Guiness on top? Can I get a ruling on this…

  54. Dale Says:

    Mai Tai – perfect summertime drink for the gay mafia

  55. Otto Man Says:

    and jack daniel’s is NOT bourbon

    Ah, a Bluegrass state elitist. I count it as one of the brownest of the browns. But if it’ll make you feel better, Matlock, I’ll stipulate that it’s a “Tennessee whiskey.”

    “We had quitters in the Revolution, too. We called them Kentuckians!”

  56. whowillsexmutombo? Says:

    Caipirinha.
    Like a Mojito, but 15% more gay!
    Also the sugar cane helps the liquor get where it needs to go faster. Biology is interesting.

  57. smurphette Says:

    Mai Thai.

    And +1 for the ecto cooler. The Hi-C version was the best juice box ever.

  58. Ben Says:

    Rusty Nail.

    Best single barrel bourbon, hands down = Blanton’s.

  59. Caveman Captain Says:

    Im going to submit one for the Judges: Snake Bite? Pear cider and Guiness on top? Can I get a ruling on this…

    Yes: you are gay.

  60. Derrick in SD Says:

    Gotta go with Absolut Citron & Sprite.
    It tastes just like sprite!

  61. Freak Power in '08 Says:

    heh, not a bluegrass state elitist, although my hometown was about 15 miles from the KY border and 35 from TN (Big Stone Gap, VA represent! hometown of over- then under- then overrated Jones brothers RBs, Thomas and Julius). for my next pick i select the French 75 (champagne, gin, lemon juice, sugar)

  62. Big Daddy Drew Says:

    Long Island Iced Tea

    YOINK

  63. Flozell Says:

    Here’s another for ya, UM:

    Moscow Mule

    1 3/4 oz vodka
    1/2 oz lime juice
    ginger beer (NOT ginger ale)
    lime wedge for garnish

  64. Uncle Jesse Says:

    UM… I hear ya on the GM floater. Some call it sacrilege. I call it fucking delicious.

    Otto… moonshine is give but it doesn’t go well in daiquiris.

    Which brings me to my next pick… a daiquiri. Not a fucking fruit smoothie but a real daiquri–rum, lime, sugar, ice.

  65. Village Pumper Says:

    Vodka Tonic

  66. Freak Power in '08 Says:

    also, my two picks have involved sparkling wines, so i might be gay now

  67. Grimey Says:

    Grey Goose and cranberry.

    No, it’s not my period.

  68. futuremrsrickankiel Says:

    Ooh ooh! French martini. It’s the only fruity drink I like. Vodka, Chambord, pineapple juice, and a splash of champagne (only if you’re feeling decadent, dahling). Sugared rim and everything. If I were the kind of girl that had a sugar daddy, that is what I would drink all day every day.

  69. Unsilent Majority Says:

    Yes Freak, yes you are

  70. Shinons Says:

    I don’t know anything but beer, whiskey sour, and whiskey on the rocks. Sigh. I feel like Doc Rivers in the fourth quarter…

    /sorry for the cheap shot futuremrs.

  71. futuremrsrickankiel Says:

    Uncle Jesse: a real daiquiri was Hemingway’s favorite drink. Bravo.

  72. smperk Says:

    flozell- ginger beer… wow! good one

  73. Borealis Says:

    Tarnished Apples. As long as my boyfriend tolerates finding the apple cider to make them, I’ll drink them.

  74. smurphette Says:

    Whoops, my bad. My blackberry doesn’t refresh fast enough. I’ll take a Midori Sour in honor of the ecto cooler.

  75. Willy Says:

    Olde English 800 with a sunken shot ‘o cheap Kentucky Nihilism! Drink’n….at least it’s an ethos

  76. Uncle Jesse Says:

    Whoops. Otto… moonshine is A GIVEN but it doesn’t go well in daiquiris.

  77. Ben Says:

    Rob Roy.

    Scotch > Rye.

  78. Dale Says:

    Socaid – Cherry Kool Aid and 100 proof Southern Comfort. Easily the best way to black out prior to 8am.

    “Socaid with me if it’s socaid with you”

  79. CuJo Says:

    Knob Creek, splash of coke if I must.

    And for those counting, that’s another Bourbon off the table (you can keep your Tennessee Whiskey).

  80. DanGleesack Says:

    Icepick;

    3 parts goose
    1 part sweet tea
    Lots of ice

  81. jackin'4beats Says:

    Is an Irish Carbomb a mixed drink (Jameson’s and Guinness)? If so, then count me ALL IN.

  82. Dale Says:

    ^Oh, also the best way to ruin a lot of upholstery.

  83. Miles O'Toole Says:

    Moscow Mule. Must be in copper mug with plenty of ice.

  84. J Says:

    Kirk Herbstreit selects: Alabama Slammer – topped with selection of three of the Tide’s least broken-in cheerleaders.

  85. Dale Says:

    Jackin, I say it is. Just because you have to drink it in a matter of seconds doesn’t mean it’s not mixed.

    /Jealous of the pick

  86. Unsilent Majority Says:

    Vodka Lemonade

    fresh squeezed lemons + simple syrup + vodka + ice = mmmm

  87. StuScottBooyahs Says:

    Grape juice and vodka. Tastes like cough syrup!

  88. Borealis Says:

    Hmm, I managed to fail to search for Maker’s correctly and have to repick. Second choice: “Berry Breeze”: Alizé Red Passion, strawberry vodka, cranberry juice & lemon-lime soda. Yes, I like fruity drinks.

  89. Ben Says:

    Original Sazerac.

  90. Shinons Says:

    Ooh, does a Jagerbomb count? I had one of those that one time my cool brother let me hang out with him. I hear they’re rather popular. I’ll pick that if it counts.

  91. Flozell Says:

    Miles O’Toole – you need to learn to read.

  92. Uncle Jesse Says:

    Gin and juice. Grapefruit, to be specific.

  93. randy Says:

    ketel soda with a lemon and a lime. i could drink that every hour on the hour.

  94. Flozell Says:

    After a couple of moderate drinks, let’s move into the hardcore:

    Four Horsemen:
    1 part Bourbon whiskey (Jim Beam)
    1 part Tennessee whiskey (Jack Daniel’s)
    1 part Scotch whisky (Johnnie Walker Red)
    1 part Tequila (Jose Cuervo) or Irish whiskey (Jameson Irish Whiskey)

    (licks lips)

  95. The Lazer Says:

    Flaming Dr. Pepper:

    1 Pint of cheap beer (preferably ice house or red dog)
    3/4 shot of root beer schnaaps
    1/4 shot of Bicardi 151

    pour the schnaaps in a shot glass, then the 151, light it on fire, then drop it in the beer. Actually does taste like Dr. Pepper.

  96. Upstate Underdog Says:

    Italian coffee = black coffee and amaretto

  97. Miles O'Toole Says:

    Flozell – Many much sorry.
    Father McCarthy

    2 part rum
    1 part Vodka
    Frozen OJ concentrate
    Frozen Limeaid concentrate
    Sprite

    For some reason this was popular at my CYO picnics.

  98. lohanslabia Says:

    Tom Collins.

  99. Dickens Cider Says:

    I ran out of rum once and all I had was moonshine so I came up with a Moonjito.

    A Mojito made with lemon flavored moonshine. Yes I do have issues

  100. smurphette Says:

    @J4B: Damn you to hell. That was my next pick. Sigh. I will take Sangria instead. My dad’s sangria is the tits.

  101. DanGleesack Says:

    Licking Toad

    2 shots of goose or belve
    half of a red bull
    splash of blue curacao

    taken as a shot

  102. Pemulis Says:

    georgi vodka and tang. itll send me right back to college

  103. Ben Says:

    BTW, I won’t draft this, but my girlfriend does a mean pomegranate martini.

  104. cannon fire Says:

    A mulled wine, heavy on the cinnamon, and light on the cloves. There we go, off with you lad and look lively.

    Thank you Clarence

  105. Otto Man Says:

    As a straight bourbon drinker, I may have to trade all my picks in this draft. Mixed drinks are just too sweet, and the non-alcoholic parts only slow down the rush to oblivion. As a result, the only thing I mix my liquor with is the occasional ice cube and a heightened sense of my own attractiveness.

    But if this is all the liquor I’m getting for the rest of my life … let’s go full on fruity and fucked-up with a Tequila Sunrise. One, two, three, floor.

  106. jackin'4beats Says:

    OK – time for the ghetto drinks…

    Thug Passion – Red Alizé and Cristal over ice. If you were trying to get fucked up, then you’ve succeeded my friend.

  107. futuremrsrickankiel Says:

    Dark rum, bourbon, splash of cream, shaken lightly and served on the rocks. I think it’s called a Midnight Cowboy… it’s like a White Russian only not so freaking sweet.

  108. Big Daddy Drew Says:

    Stoli and grapefruit.

    A must at weddings

  109. Grimey Says:

    @The Lazer: It’s not root beer schnapps, it’s amaretto.

    Also, I hate you.

  110. BigTravATX Says:

    Hey Caveman, bite my bag fucker. Chug three snakebites and see how gay you are Gieco-Bitch.

  111. jackin'4beats Says:

    @Dickens Cider – That’s one crazy drink – and you are a real drinker.
    @smurphette – that’s what I’m here for, pickin’ fast and furious m’lady!

    MUHAHAHAHA

  112. brit Says:

    Crown and Dr. Pepper. Try it.

  113. twoeightnine Says:

    Jim & Ginger.

  114. Grimey Says:

    Glenfiddich and Sprite Zero. When I want to sleep fully clothed with my contacts still in.

  115. Otto Man Says:

    Vodka Gimlet.

    Your move, Mister Bond.

  116. Otto Man Says:

    Glenfiddich and Sprite Zero.

    I hear that pairs well with the Kobe Beef and peanut butter.

  117. Ben Says:

    When I was in Bratislava for a night last fall (don’t ask), I had a drink called a B-52:
    - 2 oz. Absinthe
    - 2 oz. Bailey’s
    -2 oz. Kahlua

    Needless to say, I was set for the night.

  118. Day Late Says:

    Street Rat — make a Three Wise Men, add Texas Pete hot sauce, rinse and repeat, I never really remember what happens next

  119. Jim U. Says:

    My girly drink selection: Southern Nut
    Equal parts of Southern Comfort 100, Amaretto, lime juice and pineapple juice.

  120. CrabblerK3 Says:

    How the hell did Long Island fall this far? $2 on friday nights at a hole in the wall downtown = $10 to get your night started right.

    Bailey’s and hot chocolate. Nothing better on a snow day.

  121. Squirmin' Thurman Says:

    @Auksyte

    Back in aught-three when I was a freshman, ecto cooler was something much different. Mix Pepsi Blue with orange juice, then add a fuckload of vodka. The end result is a neon green concoction that tastes like rainbow sherbet. I got so drunk off it I ended up spending the hours between 3 a.m. and 6 a.m. alternating between puking and shitting while sweating profusely. The next day was the worst day of my life.

    /misses the good old days
    //wishes they still made Pepsi Blue

  122. Crazy Little Thing Says:

    Zombie:

    1/2 oz. Bacardi 151 proof rum (that’s the one with the fire-retardant cap)
    1 oz. pineapple juice
    1 oz. orange juice
    1/2 oz. apricot brandy
    1 tsp. sugar
    2 oz. light rum
    1 oz. dark rum
    1 oz. lime juice

  123. Otto Man Says:

    In the US of A, where Absinthe is hard to get, the B-52 is made with Grand Marnier instead.

    When I bartended in college, we used to line those up after closing the place down. I’d down two of those with my keys in hand, drive the two miles home just in time for impact. Best bombing run in history.

  124. gally Says:

    Supersonic Gin and Tonic. Yes the plain gin and tonic is off the board, but this is different.

  125. Pemulis Says:

    Anything Sandra Lee makes… It’s cocktail time! Then I’ll lay that bitch down on whatever tablescape she happens to be using and do body shots off those huge 40 year old knockers!

  126. Dickens Cider Says:

    @ Jackin
    Thanks I try. Flavored moonshine is kind of dangerous, cause you can’t really taste the moonshine….but I digress

    Second pick Torpedo Juice: Everclear + Redbull = Me fucked up

  127. qwijibo Says:

    Good ol’ boilermaker. Beer with a shot of whiskey.

  128. Don't you judge me Says:

    a drink that I’m sure BDD’s fruity high school classmates drank by the gallons:

    a Cape Codder

    Vodka, Cranberry, and some lime

  129. twoeightnine Says:

    Skippy Get Naked
    - 2 cases of cheap beer
    - 2 handles of cheap vodka
    - Powdered lemonade

    Mix in a cooler with ice, drink, wake up naked.

  130. Sarah Says:

    CrabblerK3, Long Island did not fall that far. Big Gay Drew took it a while back.

    And long island iced tea = “I want to get drunk really fast and I don’t care what my drink tastes like”

    This draft definitely separated the men from the amateurs.

  131. sappenin Says:

    kentucky gentleman and rootbeer

  132. Jim U. Says:

    Everclear and grape Kool-Aid. Let’s hope the blindness is only temporary.

  133. Freak Power in '08 Says:

    okay, i need to not be gay anymore, so i’ll take the Royal Monster–crown royal + monster energy drink

  134. Vaughan Says:

    caribou lou…

    3 parts 151, 1.5 part malibu, 5 parts pineapple juice….oh boy

  135. BigTravATX Says:

    Trashcan Punch/Jungle Juice etc. Gets’em topless every time!

  136. Unsilent Majority Says:

    Sarah drinks Stoli Raz

  137. Penn's Gigantic Head Says:

    Hop Skip and Go Naked

    1 six pack of beer
    1 fifth of vodka
    1 can of lemonade concentrate

    Mix in a cooler and enjoy while shooting off fireworks for 4th of July

  138. Penn's Gigantic Head Says:

    And fuck me, I’m 8 picks too late

  139. jackin'4beats Says:

    Gay drink time…

    Hpno-tini

    But it tastes so gooooooooooooooooood.

  140. Travis Henry's Dusty Rubbers Says:

    Nutty Irishman:
    1 shot Kahlua
    1 Shot Baileys
    1 Shot Vodka
    1 shot Amaretto/Frangelico
    1 shot coffee schnapps

    The ultimate Sunday Funday drink, served on the rocks in a highball glass.

  141. futuremrsrickankiel Says:

    Yay for bartending in college, Otto Man! Learned all my good drinking habits there… not to mention my ability to be friendly to assholes who don’t deserve it.

  142. brit Says:

    Nothing gets the night going like a RBV.

    Stoli Blueberry and Vodka.

  143. Rocco Says:

    Late to the party as always.

    I’ll go Mimosa, because mimosas and bagels makes a great breakfast.

  144. brit Says:

    *stoli blue and redbull.

  145. Tonzi Says:

    Neon Iguana

    In a shaker glass half full of ice
    3 oz Captain
    3 oz Malibu
    1.5 oz Blue Curacao
    1.5 oz lime juice
    Top off with OJ

    It’s a bright greenish-blue color. Tastes great, gets you hammered, just don’t spill it on anything.

  146. futuremrsrickankiel Says:

    Hey J4B, I went to a fashion week party in NYC a few years back and that’s what they were serving. In conclusion, if you drink Hypnotinis models will sleep with you.

  147. Don't you judge me Says:

    continuing the gay MA drink-fest:

    Vodka, Cranberry, Orange Juice, Lime wedge

  148. el domingo Says:

    dark and stormy.

    perfect summer drink that no one knows how to make properly.

  149. porky1 Says:

    Sailor Jerry Rum and Diet Coke on the rocks.

    (If it was straight spirits, I’d draft Old Overholt, neat, but I always show up late for these things.)

  150. Danny G Says:

    Skippy’s

    30 pack, handle of cheap vodka, lemonade mix, & ice. Mixed together in a dingy cooler or tub. Sounds gross, but actually tastes good and messes you up.

    /hasn’t moved on since college

  151. Dickens Cider Says:

    Redneck Margarita

    1 oz Whiskey(I prefer Jack)
    1/2 oz Triple Sec
    Margarita Mix

  152. Andy Says:

    Flaming Meaux

  153. CuJo Says:

    @el domingo: Why don’t you enlighten us then?

  154. Otto Man Says:

    Yay for bartending in college, Otto Man! Learned all my good drinking habits there… not to mention my ability to be friendly to assholes who don’t deserve it.

    Amen to that. Although I was originally a bouncer, so I also learned to tell assholes to go fuck themselves. Two sides of the coin there.

    The more I think about it, I bet my aversion to mixed drinks might be rooted in that job, dealing with people who had to have their pet drink made just so. That said, it was nice when the 21st birthday parties rolled in and asked me to give the celebrant a shot of my own choosing. Cement Mixer. Bailey’s with lime juice, so it hardens and gums up when you take it.

    Yeah, I was never in charge of cleaning the bathrooms.

  155. Rocco Says:

    Mr. Boston vodka & lemonade. Cause you pretentious assholes probably aren’t familiar with Chris Boston.

  156. SMK Says:

    the Mo.

    drink a 40 down to the label, refill with a wine cooler.

    because it gets you mo’ fucked up is why, and the ingredients are available at bodegas that don’t check ID.

    /highschool

  157. el domingo Says:

    @ CuJo

    it’s simple but people never get it right

    need a dark rum like myers or gosling’s black seal or something like that – pour 1 part that over ice to 4 parts ginger beer (not ale). stir. enjoy

  158. DenverGodfather Says:

    Colorado Bull Dog
    1 shot vodka
    1 shot Kahlua® coffee liqueur
    milk
    1 splash Coca-Cola®
    In a shaker mix Vodka, Kahlua, and milk. Pour into a rocks glass and add a splash of Coca-Cola.

    Gay – Check
    Tasty – Check
    Me hitting 400 LBS soon – Check

  159. Travis Henry's Dusty Rubbers Says:

    Skippy, the ultimate beach drink:
    1 NFL style water cooler
    30 rack of Natty Light
    1 handle of cheap vodka
    1 container of powdered Country Time Pink Lemonade

    Mix, drink, and don’t count on doing anything but shitting for two days after.

  160. BigTravATX Says:

    Everclear Roulette: Get enough shotglasses for everyone. Mix a preffered beverage in a cocktail shaker pour cocktail into all glasses but one. Pour 3/4ths everclear into remaining shotglass and fill with cocktail. mix them up so that no one knows which glass has the everclear in it and one by one take turns picking a shot… It will be clearly evident who picks the everclear shot.

  161. jim Says:

    Effen Black Cherry Vodka and Coke

  162. jackin'4beats Says:

    @futuremrsrickankiel: Well if that’s the case, then keep the Hpnotini’s flowing.

    “Of course I’m cultured and independently wealthy.”

  163. flubby Says:

    Mixing Woodford with coke??? That’s good for a cockpunch.

  164. futuremrsrickankiel Says:

    Heh. The shot I always mix for people who want a birthday shot or whatever is the Chocolate Cake. Mix lemon vodka with Frangelico and pour into shot glasses, then take a lemon wedge and cover it with sugar. Pound the shot then suck the sugar out of the lemon… it’s mighty tasty and does, in fact, taste bizarrely like chocolate cake.

    In fact, I’ma go ahead and draft that shit, even though I guess technically it’s a slammer and not a mixed drink. I’ve got 5 tasty drinks on my board and a loooong-ass day of work before I can go enjoy any of them. Damn you, KSK!

  165. John John The Bastard Says:

    In the same vein as Crabbler’s but a little stronger. Hot Chocolate and Rumplemintz. NOW there’s nothing better on a cold day.

  166. Layner Says:

    Jackin’, the Irish car bomb I’ve come to know and love is a shot glass filled with half Jameson’s, half Baileys, then dropped into a pint of Guinness and chugged. Tastes like chocolate milk. Yum.

    /sorry I’m at work
    //and that it’s 9:35 in the morning

  167. Animal Mother Says:

    Hawaiian Punch aka Red Death

    Any drink that combines the alcohol of two drinks (Kamikaze and Alabama Slammmer) into one and always served in a pitcher is the drink for me.

  168. Travis Henry's Dusty Rubbers Says:

    Superona:
    Drink the neck of a Corona, fill said neck with Bacardi Limon. The limon acts like the lime, and it still drinks like a beer. Deadly.

  169. devin hester's speech coach Says:

    Sparxxdriver. Take a 64 ounce “Mugzilla” from the local convenience store, pour two or three 16 oz. cans of sparx over ice, add a shit load of vodka, and prepare for most of your internal organs to shut down and wake up to a scene that looks straight out of Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas: dismembered mannequin, knife stuck in the wall, couch over turned.

    / my roommate drank this garbage and caused the damage above, I only sampled on occasion, but if it is the only thing I can drink the rest of my life, I want to be as fucked up as possible.

  170. Hines Ward Says:

    Baltimore Zoo. Ballgame. Over.

    http://www.drinksmixer.com/drink1026.html

  171. twoeightnine Says:

    Who’s going to be the next douche to draft Skippy?

  172. Freak Power in '08 Says:

    No, the perfect beach (and infield of a horse race, in my case, Foxfield) drink is:

    Gin Bucket
    1 bucket
    1 handle cheap gin
    2 2L bottles of Fresca
    copious amounts of citrus fruit (usually oranges, lemons, and limes) cut into quarters, squeezed into bucket and then tossed in bucket to soak

    The proper way to administer this drink is to squirt it into a girl’s mouth with a turkey baster.

  173. DenverGodfather Says:

    FMRA – That chocolate cake drink is super gay and tasty.
    /doesn’t understand flavor chemistry

  174. jackin'4beats Says:

    Mind Eraser

    I know it could be a shot, but it’s still a mixed shot.

  175. Rocco Says:

    Lunchbox:

    beer, o.j., amaretto

  176. BigTravATX Says:

    LOL the proper way to administer is to squirt it into a girls mouth…

    Awesome

  177. devang Says:

    Liquid Heroin shots. Jaeger, Rumpleminze and 151. It’ll make you do stupid shit like pass out at a strip club and then pass out in a slice of pizza. Um, not that I would know anything about that.

  178. Justino Says:

    SoCo and Sprite. We call it the Rhonda Special.

  179. devang Says:

    Mixing Woodford with coke??? That’s good for a castration.

  180. jackin'4beats Says:

    Damn you KSK, I’ve got so much freakin’ work to do before the markets close…but I am somehow compelled to keep drafting…

    OK, will draft again after doing some work.

  181. el domingo Says:

    olde fashioned.

    bourbon
    sugar
    bitters
    cherry
    orange
    ice

    muddle fruit, bitters and sugar. top with ice. add boubon.

  182. Brady's a Douchebag Says:

    A Black-Eyed Susan made at the Preakness

  183. devin hester's speech coach Says:

    The Bumskull: Take a huge cooler, and dump anything and everything that contains alcohol within (essentials: 5th of Everclear, bottle of Andre, case of beer). also include chopped up pineapple, oranges, and bananas. It has the consistency and color of vommit and burns like moonshine on the way down. Surprisingly, it does not taste awful, and two cups make you forget where your legs are.

  184. kanye east Says:

    i choose pruno, aka jail wine. tastes like you mande a margarita out of bile, yes. but if nobody goes blind or dies you’re the toast of the cellblock!

  185. Dickens Cider Says:

    Hurricane Punch
    This isn’t for the faint of heart, and probably the reason why I won’t live to be 30

    Cranberry juice, pineapple juice, light rum, dark rum, amaretto, blue curacao, orange passion fruit, a wedge of lime, a leaf of mint, a squirt of triple sec, a splash of Grand Marnier, a dash of grenadine, a pinch of coconut, a sprinkle of sugar, shaved ice. Oh, and a whole bunch of mescaline.

  186. The Incredible Fulk Says:

    Somebody picked my drink, but they picked the generic version. I’ll assume they have no taste buds and wanted Seagram’s Gin, so I’ll go with Bombay Sapphire and a SPLASH of tonic with a lime.

  187. futuremrsrickankiel Says:

    Already ganked the old-fashioned, el domingo, although I prefer them with scotch.

  188. rusrus Says:

    Pussies all…

    Shot and a beer! The only “mixed” drink that a man can drink and still look himself in the mirror…

  189. porky1 Says:

    The Scarface:

    Highball glass
    Fill 3/4 with ice
    1 shot Rumpleminze
    1 shot Bacardi 151
    Fill out with half & half

    Sounds disgusting, but tastes like the inside of a York peppermint patty and goes down nice and smooth. Sip it and don’t have more than 3, or it will utterly and completely destroy you.

  190. Tuck Fexas Says:

    Malibu Rum and Diet Coke…Tastes like a vanilla coke…oh so refreshing!

  191. el domingo Says:

    @ futuremrsrickankiel

    totally different drink with bourbon.

    but props for the pick.

  192. devang Says:

    The Newark Bum:

    MD 20/20, Colt 45, and Boon’s Farm.

  193. rusrus Says:

    …and all you people giving recipes for mixes that taste like something else (put in some gasoline, cherry juice, and beer: tastes just like a fudgecicle!) fuck off! If you want something that tastes like a Dr. Pepper, drink Dr. Pepper. If you also want a buzz, hit yourself in the head with a hammer!

  194. EberleWerner Says:

    The JD McNugent

    1 Pint Black Haus
    2 16 Oz Cans Rockstar
    1 16 Oz Cranberry-Grape Ocean Spray

    Destruction.

  195. porky1 Says:

    Barkeep! A Cosmopolitan for rusrus!

  196. Rocco Says:

    Grain alcohol, Goldschlager, and apple juice. My buddy makes it and calls it Apple Pie. He also then used himself as a human bowling ball against 10 empty kegs arranged as, well, as bowling pins.

  197. Admiral von Snugglesworth Says:

    Piss and tears from my childhood. On the rocks.

  198. SonOfSpam Says:

    This one’s for cranky Rusrus…

    Shoot the Root.

    Shot of root beer schnapps dunked in a Coors Light. Tastes just like root beer (for when you trying to hit a hot 16 year old)!

    /yeah, I’m old

  199. Pepster Says:

    @futuremrsrickankiel and otto man …

    the birthday shot I used to give out was the bar mat. Just drip whatever had filtered onto the bar mat on the rail, maybe chill just to make it look like an actual shot and serve.

    I also did not have to clean up the bathrooms.

    Since my favorite drink was taken immediately – manhattan (also an old man – and even older next week), and since my few mixed drinks I actually drink are off the board, I’ll take an island favorite “Yellowbird” – assuming someone else hasn’t taken it. This one killed me in the Bahamas in January. I prefer the recipe with the dark rum, light rum, vodka and banana liquer, and not so much orange and pineapple.

    /thanking god office closes early today for memorial weekend!

  200. Let's get boozed and smoke hash Says:

    Wild Turkey. Cut out the middle man and any fluff.

    Otto man that was funny shit:

    Glenfiddich and Sprite Zero.

    I hear that pairs well with the Kobe Beef and peanut butter.

  201. devang Says:

    For rusrus. How about I mix you a shot of my taint sweat along with some left over Paris Hilton post coital drip?

    Get the fuck out of here douchebag.

  202. Pemulis Says:

    can i have one of those?

  203. Byron_nyc Says:

    Everclear and grape kool-aid powder. Yeah, boy!

  204. Otto Man Says:

    How about I mix you a shot of my taint sweat along with some left over Paris Hilton post coital drip?

    Hey! Are you authorized to give away the secret recipe for Coors Light?

  205. TDub Says:

    omigodomigodomigodomigod, Vanilla Stoli and OJ…

    “Is that a orange-vanilla pushup that you’ve melted down and are drinking?”
    “No Sir, it just happens to be the most refresing cocktail of all!”
    And yes, I am a dude that loves the taste of summer!

  206. porky1 Says:

    The “Free” Bar Mat shot has a lot of names. I believe one of the most popular names for the garbage concoction was the “New Jersey.”

  207. porky1 Says:

    Vanilla Stoli + OJ? Isn’t that how double homicides happen?

  208. jujrok Says:

    jack daniel’s & 7up. the only liquor my sainted dad would drink, and how he introduced me to the concept that the only thing more certain than a quick drunk when mixing booze with sweet shit is an exponentially worse hangover – the latter of which i’m not in the market for at my age.

    /reaches for tumbler of oban on the rocks.

  209. Upstate Underdog Says:

    Dark and Stormy = Goslings Black Seal rum and Ginger Beer, wedge of lime optional.

    If you’ve been to Bermuda you know what I’m talking about.

  210. TDub Says:

    Otto Man,

    you brought your A-Game with the gimlet.

    Refined, a perfect portion, bang for the buck. Excellent choice.

  211. TDub Says:

    Porky,

    The OJ was framed by Fuhrman, and the Vanilla had some shit comin’ her way.

  212. jackin'4beats Says:

    @devang: thanks for helping me throw up in my mouth a little. Funny shit.

  213. James Valente Says:

    Brass monkey…the funky monkey…

    For clarification, that’s a 2/3 Malt Liquor and 1/3 Sunny D.

    JV

  214. Caveman Captain Says:

    Salty Dog.

    Vodka and grapefruit juice, glass rimmed with salt.

    Better than air-conditioning.

  215. devin hester's speech coach Says:

    I can’t believe I haven’t seen it anywhere, it has to be in here somewhere, but if not, I will go with jungle juice.

  216. Otto Man Says:

    Otto Man, you brought your A-Game with the gimlet.

    Thanks. I probably haven’t had one of those in almost a decade, but it’s a winner.

  217. bigslow Says:

    I have to say steal of the draft, my favorite drink, The Green Dinosaur:

    2 oz vodka
    2 oz gin
    2 oz rum
    2 oz Midori® melon liqueur
    2 oz triple sec
    2 oz sweet and sour mix
    2 oz 7-Up® soda

    It is a better version of a Long Island Iced Tea

  218. AshyLarry Says:

    Robitussin and gingerale (Canada Dry, because I’m classy)

  219. grande77 Says:

    AMF – Audios motherfuckers – i buy em at a hole in the wall bar. Triple sec, vodka, gin, mixed in equal parts in a big fucking glass. then topped off with some blue curaco and sprite. a couple of those and i am done

  220. SonOfSpam Says:

    Blue Hawaii

    All-you-can-drink at a luau in Maui while on my honeymoon? Um, ok.

  221. porky1 Says:

    I’m shocked that no one’s taken Purple Drank (aka Sizzurp)

    Prescription Cough Syrup (with Codeine), Sprite, and Jolly Ranchers served in a ice-filled styrofoam cup. Has caused several deaths but mmmmm good.

  222. King Shit Says:

    Hypnotiq and Malibu = Perfect breakfast on Maui

    Mixed 50/50 over ice in a big plastic glass. Plastic so you can have it by the pool. If you can avoid losing it, then after 3 you’ll be jolly as hell.

  223. booger Says:

    Rootbeer Floater
    Vanilla Sky and rootbeer. Ah, to be twelveagain.

  224. Chiswede Says:

    Ugh, there’s nothing left, so how about SoCo and Dr. Pepper. Give it a shot.

  225. Freak Power in '08 Says:

    @porky1:

    just to clarify, proper purple drank/lean/sizzurp must be made with promethazine-codeine cough syrup, not just codeine.

  226. el domingo Says:

    @ upstate underdog – i already picked dark and stormy – my first one.

  227. porky1 Says:

    I stand corrected!

  228. BigTravATX Says:

    Hey Caveman nice fuck up again. Gin and Juice is already taken, because you added salt doesnt make it not still Gin and fucking Juice.

    There isnt anything left that I would drink so I am taking my choices and retiring to my deserted Island until the final remains of my liver are pissed out and I drop dead with a glass in my hand.

  229. futuremrsrickankiel Says:

    Who on earth are all these cranky-ass commenters? It’s the Friday before a long weekend, kids. Chillllllllllllllllllllllll.

  230. Upstate Underdog Says:

    sorry el domingo, I should have hit F3 and searched for it. Dark and Stormy is all yours.

  231. dick_gozinia Says:

    My buddy used to make something called a “House Call”.

    1/2 Dr Pepper
    1/2 Dr Mcgillicutty’s Cherry Schnapps

    Good stuff. The most difficult thing to do is actually find Dr. McGillicutty’s at the liquor store.

  232. BigTravATX Says:

    Sorry Future… doucebag called me a queer… I dont judge anyone for what adult beverage they drink, we are all drunks lets live in Inebriated harmony!

  233. Rocco Says:

    Similar to “the New Jersey” I believe is the bar rag, wringed out into a glass and served. Name anyone? Said friend of the above Apple Pie drank this on a bet once. He is now a high school teacher.

  234. Freak Power in '08 Says:

    @futuremrs:

    seriously, “please, people, this is supposed to be a happy occasion…let’s not bicker and argue over who killed who”
    i’m gonna take my gay bellinis and french 75s, fill up a gin bucket, and head to the outer banks tomorrow morning

  235. Jefferson Short Bus Says:

    Holy shit. My first pick is still on the board.

    Kamikazes. By the pitcher.

  236. Smurftastic Says:

    Icebomb.

    2 shots UV Blue Vodka
    2 shots lemon vodka
    2 shots regular vodka
    mix with sprite, or if you really piss intensity, Smirnoff ice.

    I hate vodka, but my favorite bar in college used to serve these for $4 every Wednesday. Nothing like blacking out for $12.

  237. devin hester's speech coach Says:

    Phillips Union cherry whisky and coke. Mmmmmmmmm good. Best served @ The Berg in Arthur, IL.

  238. jenny Says:

    since the screwdriver and ice pick was taken off the board way early, i submit the mountain stream: aquavit, vodka, sprite. mmmm. lunchtime.

  239. bob Says:

    Dark & Stormy – Goslings rum and ginger beer

  240. Man Bear Pig Says:

    Easily the steal of the draft…

    A black and tan.
    One half Guinness, one half Bass, blend together.
    Though if you didn’t already know that, you deserve a smack upside the head.

  241. johndewar Says:

    I can’t read any more of these. I’m getting the DTs or something.

    /needs a drink NOW

  242. SonOfSpam Says:

    Going out with a thud…

    Gorilla Fart

    1/2 Wild Turkey
    1/2 151

    G’nite.

  243. Pemulis Says:

    has anyone taken The Incredible Hulk yet?

    Hynotiq and Hennesy

  244. Uncle Jesse Says:

    Not sure if it qualifies…

    I’ll take Dave Attell’s favorite drink… A LOT.

  245. jackin'4beats Says:

    Agent Orange when you’ve got to get hammered right.

    1 oz Yukon Jack® Canadian whisky
    1 oz Jim Beam® bourbon whiskey
    1 oz apple schnapps
    1 oz vodka
    1 oz light rum
    1 oz triple sec
    1/2 oz grenadine syrup
    2 oz orange juice

  246. jackin'4beats Says:

    @Pemulis: Good call, forgot about that one. I took the Hpnotini. I know it’s gay, but according to FMRA, models sleep with guys that drink it so that’s good enough for me.

  247. Upstate Underdog Says:

    @ Man Bear Pig, don’t you dare call it a Black and Tan in front of an Irish man. especially if he supports the IRA. call it a half and half. Also, mixing an Irish beer with an English beer might also piss of a few Irish.

  248. Upstate Underdog Says:

    /not Irish, but have plenty of friends who are

  249. Tuck Fexas Says:

    I’ll also take a Scooby Snack on the side…another oh so good shot!

  250. SonOfSpam Says:

    @UU: Irish people drink??????

  251. Auksyte Says:

    BDD: im going to one up you and put adios motherfucker on the board. its a long island iced tea but instead of a splash of coke, you add blue curacao.

  252. Man Bear Pig Says:

    @UU:

    Yeah, that’s what I hear. But ’round these parts (California), it’s a Black and Tan.
    I’m of Scottish ancestry, anyhow.

  253. Greg Says:

    Tequila and diet coke. I started drinking it when we ran out of bourbon (well, Jim Beam) one night, and never looked back.

  254. Man Bear Pig Says:

    I think I’ll go again:

    Brandy stinger.

    Couple variations of this, but the one I drink is:

    2 parts cheap brandy (E&J, Christian Bros), 1 part cheap Peppermint Schnapps (I use Dekuyper), served by the glass — no ice.

    I’m a broke ass, so this is a nice, inexpensive way to lose brain cells.

  255. grande77 Says:

    Beer margaritas – 8 cans of cheap beer (natty light works the best) 1/2 a half of tequila, and 1/2 a can of limeade concentrate. mix and get fucked up

  256. CJ Says:

    No name to date for me but we’ve been calling it a ‘Ghetto-rita’

    Tequila
    Grapefruit Juice
    Splash of Sprite.

    Awesome without infringing on masterbation from fingers sore from squeezing limes.

  257. Rocco Says:

    @grande77: 1/2 a cup tequila? I’ll have to try me some of those.

  258. grande77 Says:

    not half a cup but half a fifth, my mistake.

  259. Killer of Whales Says:

    Forgive me if taken – I came late to the party:

    ONE Camel Back

    TWO Bottles of Gatorade (I prefer rain or G2 to avoid all the syrup)

    ONE 375 of Everclear

    TWO Cans of Redbull.

    Ladies and gentlemen, prepare for the greatest 4 hours you’ve never remembered. …and a stomach pump.

  260. some folks call it a kaiser blade Says:

    @Auksyte
    I thought Ecto Coolers had to include at least a splash of LSD.

    Ill take a jar of peach moonshine. The peaches count as mixer, right?

  261. Rocco Says:

    @Killer of Whales…

    Assume you’ve found this out already, but just in case: Anything other than water in a CamelBak reservoir tends to linger. Recommend dedicating a separate reservior for booze, unless you like your water to taste like booze, which isn’t really a bad thing.

    Note: Jack & Coke in a Camelbak while skiing not always a good idea.

  262. Oats Says:

    back in the late HS days and early college years, i would make a punch that wasn’t named – until i stopped making it. blackouts every time.

    2 packages of tropical punch koolaid
    4 zima’s
    2 shots 151
    sugar to taste
    (makes about a gallon or so)

    stir, chill, stir, and serve. (drank this in 3 hours once…worst next 3 days of my life).

    I think it was appropriately named “date rape punch”

    /shows self the door

  263. devin hester's speech coach Says:

    Malibu rum and blue raspberry slushie mix from the local convenience store. Was I really 16 TEN years ago?

  264. Dickens Cider Says:

    @ Some Folks

    Never had peach moonshine but the grape and Lemon are really good.

  265. jenny Says:

    @ oats

    hahaha. zima. hahaha.

    /cracks open a smirnoff ice

  266. aaron Says:

    Talk about a steal …

    Turkey Squirt.

    1 part Wild Turkey.
    1 part Squirt soda.

    Drink it up!

  267. Monkey Business Says:

    Gin and sprite. Twist of lemon. Splash of pineapple juice. The nice thing about it is that the more you drink, the cheaper they get. You just have to tell the bartender to start replacing the Bombay Sapphire (and you ARE using Bombay Sapphire) with whatever cheap shit bathtub moonshine they call gin.

  268. Lucky Like Little Says:

    The steal of the draft – the Third Reich!

    - 1 shot Jagermeister
    - 1 shot Rumplemintz
    - 1 shot Goldschlager

    My Jew friends love it!

  269. Tech N9ne's Tribute to Falco Says:

    The Alaskan Ice Tea

    Make a Long Island without the coke, add blue curacao, more booze, and it’s blue!

  270. Karen Says:

    Amaretto Sour. Makes the panties come off.

  271. Ben Says:

    Mexican coffee (coffee + a splash of Kahlua) always is a good start to my morning

  272. Auksyte Says:

    @ tech 9 – thats an adios motherfucker. which i already took :)

  273. dickey simpkins Says:

    Liquid Cocaine. Not only is it a highly comical drink name to say at the bar…it tastes like fun.
    1 shot Bacardi 151
    1 shot Jaeger
    1 shot Goldschlager

    Also, if you are trying to be a gangster, the Incredible Hulk (equal parts Hipnotiq and Hennesey) is quite fun.

    Also, if anyone has ever visited/attended University of Illinois in Champaign, the Ice Bomb is quite ridiculous and popular on “Bomb Night.”
    2 oz UV® blue raspberry vodka
    2 oz orange vodka
    2 oz vodka
    1 – 2 oz Sprite® soda

  274. jackin'4beats Says:

    Red Devil

    1 1/2 oz vodka
    1 1/2 oz peach schnapps
    1 1/2 oz Southern Comfort® peach liqueur
    1 1/2 oz sloe gin
    2 oz triple sec
    2 oz orange juice
    1 splash grenadine syrup

    Mix alcohols into an ice-filled cocktail shaker. Add the juice and grenadine, and shake. Serve in a 10-12 oz. glass.

    I had a few of these in NJ once…ONCE.

  275. jhey Says:

    / crtl-F “lawnmower”
    / “Phrase not found”

    Well then… the Lawnmower.

    Vodka + wheatgrass. A favorite of Ron Howard.

  276. kang+kodos Says:

    Crunk Juice + Hennessey=memories of being a douchebag drunk in high school

  277. permanentginbreath Says:

    hendricks’s, a little bit of soda water, and a couple of ice cubes. the perfect drink.

  278. Dutch Says:

    Singapore Sling, and who ever suggested a Turkey Squirt should be prosecuted by the Wild Turkey Corporation. That’s just a travesty.

  279. Rocco Says:

    @Lucky Like Little:

    3 shots in a row, or all mixed together as a drink? Much interest from the friends on this one. Thank you kind sir.

  280. Juice Springsteen Says:

    The “Fish in the barrel”

    vodka+cranberry juice+rohypnol

    Hey, nothing in the draft rules said I personally have to drink what I order.

  281. Francois_Leroux_Speedskater Says:

    @twoeightnine

    Your Skippy Get Naked was my Yank Me Crank Me…and we put two 2 liter Sprites in as well. I know–we were pansies.

    Also, I can’t believe that that came off the board.

  282. smurphette Says:

    @UU and Man Bear Pig: Actually, MBP is correct. It’s a Black and Tan because Bass is English beer. The superior version, a pure Half and Half, is made with Guinness and Harp. And I’ll draft it now.

  283. Chamomiles Davis Says:

    Gin and tonic = my go-to wedding drink.

  284. smurphette Says:

    Um, where do I sign up for this “gin bucket”? It sounds tremendous.

  285. Sooze Says:

    a tall Jameson 7 with a lemon, served by the hottest bartender I have ever seen in my life, not appropriately named Ginsy.

  286. Dr. Quim Snaggletaint Says:

    The Diver Down from Silky O’Sullivan’s in Memphis – a gallon of liquor, mixers, beer and wine, all served in an attractive yellow bucket

  287. Auksyte Says:

    a magnum hurricane (something like 93 shots of 151) from patty obriens in memphis. 8 of us drank that thing in under a half hour. the people who ordered one at the table next to us nearly a half hour prior didnt even come close to finishing. http://flickr.com/photos/moacir/381266540/in/set-72157594520290260/

  288. Auksyte Says:

    the finished product: http://flickr.com/photos/moacir/381267658/in/set-72157594520290260/

  289. gamebl0uses Says:

    double whiskey coke, no ice.

  290. miamidiesel Says:

    Because I’m preposterously late to this draft (seriously WTF KSK, when big shit like this is going down you need to give people some advance notice), and because a CTL+F search didn’t turn up anyone as having drafted these drinks, and the fact that I’m about to head out for the long weekend, here’s three picks at once. The first two will cost you a bit at the bar, but they taste fantastic and will absolutely kick your ass.

    Lucky Seven
    1/2 shot each – sloe gin, triple sec, amaretto, southern comfort, skyy vodka, jack daniels, and bacardi 151
    1 part each – orange juice, cranberry juice, lime juice

    Spring Water
    4-5 shots vodka, shaken over ice with one part each club soda and tonic, a splash of sprite, and a lemon twist

    The last one is for the ladies – I’ve never encountered a woman who didn’t love this drink, and it will get you laid if you play your cards right

    Hazelnut Martini – a vodka martini with a half-to-full shot of Frangelico.

  291. KidLump Says:

    When I was bartending and people said “surprise me” I’d make a Snotty Brat. Shot glass, one part Jim, one part Jack, one part Cuervo, one part Jager, poured in that order. Wow, the face they make when it first hits is just like a baby with a problem, then the Jager takes over and their sense of relief washes over their face, just like an infant.

    And I started my shift with a Raging Bull: rocks glass, 1/2 Red Bull, 1/2 vodka

    I have issues

  292. Westbrook Is My Anti-Drug Says:

    My grandmother’s drink of choice was the Manhattan. At her funeral last month, we all had one in her honor at the luncheon. I took one sip and three inches of hair grew on my back. I would have drunken the rest of it, but I had to drive home. That day, I had a newfound respect for my grandmother, who’d drink about six or seven of them and still be coherent enough not to fuck up Thanksgiving dinner.

    Aaanyway, my only pick of this draft is the Chuck Norris. It’s a shot of vodka with a Chuck Norris spinkick to the face as the chaser. It only takes one to put you on your ass.

  293. Rikadyn Says:

    @Lucky Like Little: Seig Heil!

    @ottoman: Absinthe is hard to get…just little pricey…

    So with that I’ll go with a Green Vesper

    regular vesper except with absinthe and lime instead of kina lillet and lemon

  294. Otto Man Says:

    Amaretto Sour. Makes the panties come off.

    Or, if a man is drinking it — on.

  295. devin hester's speech coach Says:

    Dr. Quim Snaggletaint, I hear you my friend. Those buckets take you to a whole other level of retarded.

  296. Naptown Drew Says:

    Dammit.

    Tequila and Squirt. The Latinos here love that shit. Now so do I.

  297. Chamomiles Davis Says:

    Westbrook,

    My grandmother’s funeral was yesterday. In her honor I knocked back a shot of Jameson’s. (My younger sister and cousins, however, insisted on drinking for their toast some monstrosity called a “Surfer on Acid.” Kids today…)

  298. Lucky Like Little Says:

    @Rocco

    Mixed together, taken as a shot. I gave it to the lead singer of a band in suburban Minneapolis during a break in his set, and instead of singing the words he just yelled “Lucky, what did you give me?” over and over again…

  299. Spicoli Says:

    Too lazy to read the list… My picks

    Irish Carbomb (NO not a boilermaker)

    if thats taken….

    I’ll draft.

    The Jedi Mind Trick
    1 oz. Cinnamon Schnapps
    1 oz. Baily’s Irish Cream
    1 oz. Melon Liquor
    and a splash of rum
    Mix with ice and serve

  300. Oats Says:

    i will also take a mac & water (macnaughton’s) – or Jameson & water. not because i’m a puss, but b/c it’s a tribute to my now passed grandfather.

  301. make it snow Says:

    It’s a mark of how late I am that I’m forced to take Kahlua and hot chocolate with my first pick. Damn good for after-ski though.

  302. Westbrook Is My Anti-Drug Says:

    Chamomiles

    I doubt your grandmother would have been caught dead drinking that. Here’s to our family matriarchs being less pusstastic than their supposedly more masculine grand-offspring!

  303. Westbrook Is My Anti-Drug Says:

    The Surfer on Acid, that is

  304. Spanky Datass Says:

    Late and lazy as well so I’ll act an ass and draft a
    Toronto (Its the Manhattan of the north don’t-cha-know, eh?)

    Canadian whisky (correct spelling)
    sweet vermouth
    bitters
    m cherry
    dick joke

  305. KidLump Says:

    Pink gin:
    Rocks glass, rocks, gin, dash bitters

  306. Wooderson Says:

    Animal mother you bastard you stole my drink. However, a Red Death has Sambucca in it, which is the most godawful liquer on panet earth. The Red Devil is the one you’re tinking of.

    I guess since all the good stuff has been taken, I’ll have to go wit the Italian Iced tea:
    Bacardi Limon
    Disaronno Amaretto
    Cranberry juice.

    Yes, it tastes very good. Yes, it’s extremely fruit, but I’m 300 commetns behind, and the good stuff has all been taken.

  307. Dave Chappelle Says:

    Grape Drank.

    Sugar. Water. Purple.

  308. Not a Gunslinger Says:

    Hpnotiq and Redbull, only way to make hypnotiq tolerable

  309. Jesus Blowjobbing Christ Says:

    The Skynyrd – Sweet Tea and Beam
    Perfect for when you run out of Coke and haven’t moved on to the “just pour it in my fucking mouth” phase.

  310. 12 Pack Abs Says:

    I’ll take a “Why I Live in California”.

    1 16 oz mug of Sierra Nevada
    1 shot glass of Jameson

    Drop shot glass in mug, garnish with a HEALTHY pinch of medicinal grade chiba.

    Watch ballgame until 4th inning.
    Nap.

  311. Kaz Drunkard Says:

    252
    1 part wild turkey 101 proff
    1 part bacardi 151

    Don’t remember anything else the rest of the night.

  312. dmtt Says:

    Polish buffalo grass wodka–chilled and straight.

  313. Zack Says:

    I can’t imagine anything good is left this late in the day (this is what happens when you spend your afternoon auditioning Thai prostitutes for a snuff film) so I’ll go with a Snowshoe, which is:
    1 part Wild Turkey
    1 part Peppermint Schnapps

  314. Zack Says:

    And since nobody has posted for over an hour, I’m going to cheat and make my second pick a Flaming Homer.

  315. nundy Says:

    snake bite: drop a shot of cuervo in a beer of your choice. the shot is topped off with tobasco sauce.

  316. dinosaur Says:

    Well, I’m waaaay late, but this draft could have gone on for three days and my drinks would have never been chosen.

    1) Pisco and Coke. Preferably Capel brand pisco, but Alto del Carmen is acceptable. No Peruvian pisco, though, that stuff tastes like ass.

    2) Santori whiskey and Coke. For relaxing times, make it Santori time.

  317. deafjeff Says:

    chambord and gingerale

  318. Rae Carruth Says:

    Optimus Prime:

    2 oz Hpnotiq liqueur (Pour into glass first)
    1 oz Gin
    1 oz Rum
    1 oz Patron Tequila
    1 oz Vodka
    Top off with some Grenadine

    Good stuff

  319. Matty L-Train Says:

    In honor of Woody Boyd, Sam “Mayday” Malone, and the greatest beer drinker in history, Norm Peterson:

    The Screaming Viking
    2 oz vodka
    1 oz dry vermouth
    1 oz lime juice
    1 celery stalk
    1 spear cucumber (slightly bruised)

  320. Medical Professional Says:

    My parents are from Cuba, they have most my extended family still there. On mother’s day, my Dad will make a phone call to my grandmother still on the island. But sometimes…my alcoholic uncle will pick-up the phone. Tio Alcolico invented a drink on the island that’s supposedly popular but I 100% doubt that:

    “Las Estrellas” (translation, The Stars)

    1/5 Rubbing Alcohol
    4/5 Water

    God, what a miserable country. Please lift the embargo before my uncle loses his eye sight.

  321. Scrumtrulescent Says:

    Transfusion (any decent bartender at a golf course will know)

    or

    Compton (40 of Old English 800, drink down to the bottom neck, fill vacated space with orange juice.)

  322. Westbrook Is My Anti-Drug Says:

    I think I’ll close out the draft with a Jersey Turnpike, which is the contents of your bartender’s rag squeezed into a shotglass.

  323. Tobias Says:

    Colorado whiskey straight up. If you haven’t heard of it you better ask somebody….

    RIP Michael Burkill d. 5/24/08 – you are loved and missed

  324. Tobias Says:

    also, if you find a bartender that will actually serve someone a jersey turnpike (aka whatever is in the mats), that fucker should be beaten severely for disrespecting their duties – the idea is to get people drunk but not by being wretched. if you want to be mean be creative….

    … like goldschlager/jack & cuervo = “mexican/kentucky gold” or the “fucked up computer monitor” which is made by spilling whiskey on your laptop (i’m guessing)

    RIP MB

  325. Tom Brady's Man Chowder Says:

    late to the party my joint is still on the board: Jameson and ginger ale.

  326. Big Jon Says:

    Chambord margarita with a silver patron floater. When an establishment limits a particular drink at three per person, you know it’s special. If you have Z-Tejas in your area, make it happen.

  327. Drave Says:

    @Stifler: Beer with a load in it.

  328. seacunt Says:

    serbian troubador
    2 part captain
    1 part kaluha
    1 part baileys
    4 parts root beer

  329. MoRic Says:

    1. Sucker Punch – Drink the neck out of a Corona, and refill with Citrus Vodka (the name is appropriate).
    2. Crown Royal & 1/2 water, 1/2 ginger (water takes the edge off the hangover).

  330. Daveybeq Says:

    Not sure if this is taken, too much to read, but I doubt it.

    Caribou Lou

    Half bottle of bacardi 151 in a jug
    One cup of Malibu
    Fill the rest of the jug with pineapple juice

    Thank you Tech N9ne…. gets you fucked up.

  331. TX Beer Hunter Says:

    There have been several mentions of different types of whiskey that I would refer to as training wheels quality (Crown, Makers, JD, etc) but none for the grand champion, BOOKER’S. Mixing with anything other than some ice would be considered a sin.

  332. Dr. Steve Brule Says:

    Maker’s Mark & Yoo Hoo
    It’s called “The Menstown.”

    Sounds gay, but isn’t.

  333. Pantalones Says:

    White Man’s Burden

    Vanilla Smirnoff
    Vanilla Coke

    Taste the guilt.

  334. BigDumbJack Says:

    I gotta go with Liquid Pecan Pie

    2 parts dr pepper
    1 part Weller’s Antique

  335. Vowelz Says:

    The T.O. : Jose Cuervo Reserva de la Familia shaken over ice with a shot of olive juice. In a rocks glass up with 3 large olives.

    With the best tequila you’ve ever tasted it’s a primetime performer but it’s gonna leave a sour taste in your mouth and just like footballs thrown T.O.’s way over the middle in crunch time you’re gonna be hitting the floor from time to time.

  336. ognihs Says:

    best. topic. ever.

    i’m surprised no one went with the classic vodka and tonic. 4 days later…

  337. miamidiesel Says:

    Also, one other one that hasn’t been taken but I order regularly:

    Hennessey, Red Bull, and Orange Juice

    Can substitute apple juice for the OJ if you want. Tastes absolutely fucking delicious either way

  338. Steven Vincent Says:

    A buddy urged me to check out this website, great post, fanstatic read… keep up the cool work!

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