KSK Commenter Draft: Irrational Hatred

At KSK, we revel in the full breadth of antipathy, whether it be aimed at deserving targets like Peter King, the city of Indianapolis, Carl Peterson and Carson Palmer. Or really deserving targets like Patriots fans, Patriots players and Patriot Pat.

What gets lost in this festival of rancor are (What? Love? The fuck is that?) those people you hate deeply and irrationally, whereas the consensus of them is frustratingly positive. These are people (Tina Fey) that everyone seems to love and, on the surface, seem decent enough but just happen to rub you the wrong way (Tina Fey) to the extent that you’d like to cast them into the most gator-filled pond you can find. (The gators have a taste for female comedians also).

These need not be sports figures, per se. I find it’s not difficult to find easy justification to hate an athlete. Maybe they don’t exhibit outward obnoxiousness, but do they play for your favorite team? No. Welp, there you go. I justified my hatred of Marcus Allen for years with that one.

My opening pick: Mary J. Blige. (Tina Fey is too easily justified)

Good gracious, this woman is a warbling bag of annoying. “Family Affair” just won’t leave the goddamn radio, will it? Yes, Mary, I have plenty of hateration. And I don’t even have to go to a fucking dancery to have it either. What was that album called? “No More Drama”? Nice away message for 6th grader. DIE.

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583 Responses to “KSK Commenter Draft: Irrational Hatred”

  1. Otto Man Says:

    Mike Krzyzewski.

    And if I have to explain it to you, then fuck you too.

  2. devin hester's speech coach Says:

    Miguel Tejada. Get fucked you clap-happy sonofabitch!!

  3. Otto Man Says:

    Maybe they don’t exhibit outward obnoxiousness, but do they play for your favorite team? No. Welp, there you go. I justified my hatred of Marcus Allen for years with that one.

    I almost needed a therapist when Allen went from the Raiders to my Chiefs. It was like emotional whiplash.

  4. Biggus Rickus Says:

    Janeane Garofallo: Too easily justifiable?

  5. Derrick in SD Says:

    I’m gonna go out on a big limb and say George W. Bush. From the first time I saw him on TV, there was something just not quite right about him. I think mainly it’s that he wears suits with shoulder pads to make himself look bigger and struts around like he’s actually accomplished something.

  6. ABM Says:

    Casting Director for “That 70’s Show”
    probably a good person but I shouldn’t have to spell it out

  7. Ryno Says:

    Kwame Kilpatrick.

    Arguably the worst American mayor in the last 50 years and absolutely will not step down while facing an almost certain perjury conviction.

  8. dougery Says:

    Just so we’re clear, I take it we are supposed to pick things that most people like, but we hate AND there is no good justification for the hatred.

    I’m just spelling this out because I’m already seeing things that nobody likes AND can be hated for so many perfectly rational reasons.

  9. TDub Says:

    Will Smith. Arrogant asshole, I think.

  10. The Last Unitard Says:

    Motherfucking god-damn Joan Cusack.

    I hate her, so much… That… it… it… flam – flames. Flames, on the side of my face, heaving… breath – , heaving breaths. Heaving breath…

  11. camcam Says:

    David Terrell. I once witnessed him catch a 6-yard pass ,(his first catch of the game…in the third quarter) get up, and proceed to do a dance more elaborate than the “Ickey Shuffle”

  12. TDub Says:

    Unitard, you have to be chewing on your own mouth when you say that.

  13. Otto Man Says:

    I think Dougery makes a good point. I hesitated on Coach K, but then I remembered that fucking commercial with him where a day in his presence becomes some kind of baby boomer circle jerk.

    But picking George W. Bush when he’s got the approval ratings of airborne syphilis is just too easy.

  14. buzz Says:

    will leitch

  15. Lil Lebowski Urban Achievers Says:

    All of you.

    Just kidding. I kid because I care.

    Blood drive telemarketers

    If it’s gotta be irrational, I’m going with the American Red Cross volunteer that calls me every month tricking me into giving blood. Yeah, I’ve got O-, but f___ if you don’t sell 80% of donations to research companies that can buy that stuff.

  16. G.G. Says:

    Jared from Subway. Too lazy to make your own goddamn sandwiches? OK: here’s a lifetime endorsement, love Subway.

    Eat shit.

  17. POD Says:

    Kobe Bryant…such a douche

  18. devin hester's speech coach Says:

    Rachael Ray. She seems like a nice lady, and she’s hot enough, but her voice makes my skin crawl. Are we allowed to irrationally hate-fuck our draft picks?

  19. smurphette Says:

    While there is certainly justification for hating David Wright (douchebag!), I’ll pick him because the extent of my hatred is probably a little irrational. I fucking hate that asshat. YOU ARE NOT A GOLD GLOVE THIRD BASEMAN! bYou and Lo Duca were
    made for each other
    . Die.

  20. porky1 Says:

    Sarah Jessica Parker. Can I get an “Amen?”

  21. Chocolate Construda Says:

    Tawwwmy Brady.

    Nuff said

  22. Upstate Underdog Says:

    the fat bitch from Barefoot Cuntessa on Food network. my wife watches it.

  23. Yinzer Greco Says:

    Fergie. I can’t stand this pig whore. She keeps popping out terrible catchy songs that are constantly played on the radio. She thinks she’s hot when in reality she looks like Corky from Life Goes On. Lets not forget she pissed herself herself on stage. I liked to set her face on fire and put it out with a pitchfork.

  24. Biggus Rickus Says:

    Raphael Nadal: Yes, I watch tennis sometimes (I’ll let you all decide how gay that makes me), and I want this man to tear his achilles tendon everytime he steps on the court. I don’t really think I have any justification for this feeling.

  25. Chocolate Construda Says:

    Can I have sloppy seconds on the Rachel Ray hate-fuck?

  26. jd Says:

    charlie brown.

    pathetic fucking loser.

  27. Lil Lebowski Urban Achievers Says:

    Every single fantasy football expert.

    You are all full of shit. (except you, Football Outsiders, I love you)

  28. Jay Says:

    Either Tim Buckley or Paris Hilton

    …I think I’ll go with Paris

  29. TDub Says:

    Joe Lieberman, mostly because he sounds like he’s burping every time he talks. That’s the irrational part. The rational hatred comes from the fact that he’s a flip-flopping chicken-hawk.

    There, I feel better.

  30. Slash Says:

    I don’t know if it’s irrational, per se, but the best I can do right now:

    I hate those fucking Salvation Army bell ringers. I’d offer them money to stop ringing that goddam bell while I’m anywhere near or in the store, but they wouldn’t take it. Lots of other people seem to think they’re a jolly, merry harbinger of the holidays, but they just annoy the fuck outta me. More and more every time I hear them.

    One day, I will probably be arrested for grabbing the bell away from one of them and flinging it into traffic.

  31. denvergodfather Says:

    First I am with porky1 big time.

    My pick that cumguzzler Tim Duncan. He has never fouled anybody. I hope the mutt enjoys his summer.

  32. Snowflake the Dog Says:

    Oprah. Fuck her.

  33. Slash Says:

    Everybody hates Rachael Ray. I’m pretty sure even she’s sick of herself.

  34. Mike Says:

    Good Charlotte. Your a god damn pop band, ur not even the least bit badass, so easy with the tatoos and what not. And that god damn whiny voice is like nails scratching a chalk board

  35. TDub Says:

    Stop saying mutherfucking EVOO!!! Saying “olive oil” takes less time, Rachel!

  36. DC Says:

    Dane cook…and i know everyone that’s smart hates him too, but apparently, there are waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay more dumb people in this country and that’s how this dumb dick has a career.

  37. Hank Scorpio Says:

    Nickelback – die in a fiery bus crash you poseurs.

  38. Ssswayze Says:

    The fat kid from Superbad. God I want to punch him.

  39. Oz Says:

    Everyone who is on Chuck Norris’s balls

    Fuck ‘em.

  40. porky1 Says:

    Wow a lot of Rachel ray hatahs here. Neat.

    Kevin Garnett.

    Stop popping your jersey and screaming KG. You still ain’t never won shit.

  41. devin hester's speech coach Says:

    Brett Favre. No explanation necessary.

  42. Biggus Rickus Says:

    Chris Fowler: Never heard anyone criticize, but he seems like a fucking smug douchebag to me.

  43. porky1 Says:

    FUCK, DC I totally forgot about Dane Cook. SJP must have blinded me with pick #1.

  44. Lil Lebowski Urban Achievers Says:

    American Broadcating Company

    8 months til the next episode of LOST. FUCK YOU.

  45. manchoi44 Says:

    Tom Colicchio from Top Chef. IT’S JUST FOOD!!!

  46. TDub Says:

    Not sure if Bill Belicheck is preclued from selection because of the opening Pats salvos. If not, I’ll take double B for the win. I only hate him because… I really have no idea why.

  47. camcam Says:

    Willem DaFoe. Seems like a good enough actor, just bugs the shit out of me for some reason.

  48. Grimey Says:

    The New Radicals. Fuck you and fuck your collection of bucket hats.

  49. rusrus Says:

    @Unitard: that was Madeline Khan from Clue…

    Bobby Flay. I’m sure he’s a great guy, but WTF? That fucker’s everywhere on the Food Network. They push one star to the limit and then you’re hated by the world, and they dump you…

  50. crazy joe davola Says:

    Donald Trump. Don’t want him dead, but probably would risk the jail time to kick him square in the nuts. Lousy businessman with a great PR machine, hair that just defies logic and physics, and won’t fucking stop breeding. It’s just disgusting at this point.

  51. smperk Says:

    JK Rowling.

    I could’ve done that shit.

  52. Chocolate Construda Says:

    Kevin Costner. The Willem DaFoe (who I’m cool with) pick reminded me how much I hate Costner

  53. DC Says:

    Shia Lebouf…could someone seem like they’d be less likeable in person than this kid?

  54. camcam Says:

    @ rusrus – I agree about Flay, except I’m sure he’s an asshole.

  55. Mr. Bentley Says:

    Do I have to wait a full 50 turns to knock out the entire cast of “the view”? Yes? Okay, then it is my duty to waste my day doing so.

    First: Elizabeth Hasselbeth, the brainwashed, kinda-sexy-if-she-wasnt-crazy-and-fucking-annoying, with of a backup quarterback.

  56. Or Says:

    I can’t believe I’m the first to list Oprah.
    Her associate (lackey?) Dr. Phil is next.

  57. Otto Man Says:

    Larry the Cable Guy.

    Not only painfully unfunny in a Branson Missouri All-Star Revue kind of way, but he’s not even a genuine redneck. He grew up in a middle-class suburb in Nebraska and went to private school. His whole schtick is a white trash version of blackface minstrelsy.

    You and Carlos Mencia need to have a murder-suicide pact. Git-R-Done, assclowns.

  58. Lil Lebowski Urban Achievers Says:

    Bridgette Moynihan

    You’re cute, but did you really need to provide Brady with a fertile womb?

    No. No you did not.

  59. TDub Says:

    Or:

    Oprah is off the board

  60. DanGleesack Says:

    Kanye West

    Pompous, and for no good reason.

  61. porky1 Says:

    Tyler Perry.

    Not only do I have to deal with your newest race-diminishing portrayal of Madea or cookie-cutter shit ripoff of Waiting to Exhale polluting the poster frames at the local theater EVERY SIX MONTHS I have to watch the puke-awful promos for House of Payne during every TNT playoff game.

    Not. Fucking. Funny.

  62. dougery Says:

    as a kid my top irrational hatred was of Sundays.

    In theory, its a weekend day, and since my folks were not religious, there was nothing scheduled, a free day to do whatever i wanted. Sounds like heaven. But school was right around the corner, spitefully making me hate a perfectly good day. All i wanted to do was play with transformers, or later video games or my friends, but no. all the fun was tempered with unease as the awfulness of Monday loomed over me mocking my Lego castles, saved princesses, or time spent hanging out in the woods (if we were really lucky with our hands on beer or boobs or both).

    fuck Sundays as a kid. way to ruin half the weekend you stupid… day of the week.

  63. Upstate Underdog Says:

    the entire cast of Friends. how the fuck did that show last so long while Arrested Development last 3 seasons?

  64. Biggus Rickus Says:

    Anyone who drives the actual speed limit (or inexplicably under it): I’ve got places to be people, and you’re adding minutes to my trip. I guess this isn’t that irrational on its face, but my murderous thoughts certainly are.

  65. Naptown Drew Says:

    Dave Matthews. Please die quickly and take your fans with you.

  66. TDub Says:

    The dude with the big mouth from the “carhop” commercials.

    Anyone? Is this thing on? Tap tap tap

  67. sdbruin Says:

    all four of the Sex in the City bitches. Get ‘em out. Each and every annoying one of ‘em.

  68. Veritas Says:

    Gotta go with Jerry Seinfeld. Everybody loved Seinfeld, but whenever I watched any part of an episode I want to strangle the whole lot of those worthless fucks.

  69. TDub Says:

    From your mouth to god’s ears, dougery.

  70. Mr Snrub Says:

    +1 to Unitard’s Clue reference.

    Seth McFarlane. I don’t actively hate anything he’s done, but fuck him anyway.

  71. devin hester's speech coach Says:

    That little shithead kid on the one commercial that comes into his parent’s bedroom and lectures them about investment strategies. I LOATHE YOU.

  72. Biggus Rickus Says:

    @dougery

    I experienced that same feeling of Sunday dread.

  73. Mike Says:

    Howard Stern, used to be good but he’s a douche now

  74. 85 Says:

    Journey. Fuck fucking Journey. I hate them. Fuck Journey.

  75. Naptown Drew Says:

    Bill O’Reilly. I have never witnessed a man more in love with himself.

  76. 85 Says:

    @dougery

    You think your Sundays were bad? Just imagine if your parents were religious.

  77. Lil Lebowski Urban Achievers Says:

    Dave Chappelle.

    Your absence leaves the door open for the redneck comedians and Mencia. Come back and all is forgiven.

  78. camcam Says:

    People who walk their cats on a leash. You know who you are.

  79. TDub Says:

    @Naptown

    any hatred of BOR is exceedingly rational, so I’m not sure if it qualifies for this draft

  80. slothrop Says:

    Van Morrison.

  81. porky1 Says:

    Irrational hatred to a “T”….

    Michael Jordan. Fuck em’.

  82. Lil Lebowski Urban Achievers Says:

    @camcam

    The wizard cat gets what the wizard cat wants.

  83. TDub Says:

    The inventor of th baby bjorn.

    You’ve turned millions of infants into yuppie scumbag accessories.

  84. Upstate Underdog Says:

    Keith Olberman. He was cool on Sports Center, now he is just a douchebag that calls everyone that disagrees with him the worst person in the world. fuck off.

  85. mini dagger Says:

    will ferrell – used to like him back in the 90’s on his early days of snl. now I wish he would die.

  86. Biggus Rickus Says:

    Along the lines of TDub’s pick, parents who dress their babies in political t-shirts. Congrats, fuckface, you just turned your baby into a protest sign.

  87. porky1 Says:

    Lil Lebowski…that is the very definition of irrational hatred. Love so much that you hate. Hater of the year.

  88. devin hester's speech coach Says:

    Ray Romano. Everybody might have loved Raymond, but I sure as fuck didn’t.

  89. Upstate Underdog Says:

    @TDUB, amen. my next pick was going to be people that only dress their infants in name brand clothes that they will outgrow in a month. Note to parents, 9 month olds do not care if there cloths come The Gap or Wal-Mart.

  90. Mr Snrub Says:

    Warren Buffet- for calling himself “The Oracle of Omaha.” What a stupid fucking nickname.

  91. Naptown Drew Says:

    @TDub

    Fair enough.

    50 Cent. G-G-G-G-G-G-G-Grow up and make some meaningful music rather than try to convince us that you “Still Kill.” Your bodyguards are laughing at you.

  92. TDub Says:

    UU,

    but if the child doesn’t learn how to dress to succed now, when will she?

  93. porky1 Says:

    Brett Ratner.

    Fuck that guy. Anyone of us on this board could just tell the cast and crew “let’s just do what it says in the script and go home.”

  94. slothrop Says:

    I was going to go with Jim Kramer, but he was on AD which earns him grace points for life. So Suze Orman. STFU you fucking hag, I’m only checking on PBS to see if The Civil War or The War is on, I don’t need your shrill voice in my head for one second.

  95. porky1 Says:

    Sorry, didn’t wait my turn…just really wanted to get that one out….will forfeit one pick…

  96. Upstate Underdog Says:

    good point TDub

  97. crazy joe davola Says:

    @naptown 50 making a comeback. Burned down his baby mama house this morning rather than let her live there. Well done and welcom back

  98. Auksyte Says:

    ANYONE who pronounces the word nuclear “nuke-you-lar”. its “nuke-lee-ar”. makes me want to rip my ears off when i hear it.

  99. Otto Man Says:

    Jimmy Buffett.

    Where I come from, sunburned beach bums who sing shitty songs about booze and cheeseburgers are properly known as “homeless people.”

  100. Otto Man Says:

    Sorry, Auksyte, George W. Bush has already been taken.

  101. TDub Says:

    now that’s funny

  102. cannon fire Says:

    This pick would have been perfect about 2 years ago. Katie Couric.

    I got so sick of hearing about how great she is at interviewing. No, she sucks. Now that she’s mired in last place, I feel that my hatred is vindicated. It might even be rational at this point, but I’m sticking with it.

    And porky1’s pick of Tyler Perry is brilliant!! An absolute steal.

  103. Mike H. Says:

    Tony Parker. Easy.

    TP and I have the same birthday; he is exactly one year older than me. Look at what he’s got – multiple rings, Eva Longoria – and look at me.

    Personally, I think this is pretty rational hatred.

  104. camcam Says:

    Adam Sandler. Stop talking like a fucking six year old.

  105. Upstate Underdog Says:

    emo kids. stop fucking crying, you live in the suburbs.

    great pick Otto, with Jimmy Buffet.

  106. Naptown Drew Says:

    Alfonso Soriano. Just because you’re using a telephone pole for a bat doesn’t mean you need to swing at every pitch. And stop it with the fucking hop already. Also, Big Brown called. He wants his teeth back.

  107. Lil Lebowski Urban Achievers Says:

    The Eagles.

    @Mr. Snrub: I really doubt he gave himself that nickname. Seems like the most down-to-earth billionaire we’ll ever see in our lifetime.

  108. TDub Says:

    Christiano Ronaldo.

    I just flopped and threw my laptop four feet in the air.

  109. cannon fire Says:

    slothrop. Fantastic pick on Suze Orman. I absolutely loathe her, and she was next on my board

  110. Tech N9ne's Tribute to Falco Says:

    Eddie Vedder

  111. Rutang Says:

    Flavor Flav…I guarantee Martin Luther King would hate Flavor Flav.

  112. manny fresh!! Says:

    not clear on if i have to choose a person, or can i just hate anything??

    so, 2 options –

    mayonnaise. just the sight of it makes me wanna set fires.

    or…

    mariah carey. bitch is not cute. achieved penultimate hatred watching her throw out that ‘pitch’. and listen, celebrities. if you know your ass is going to be nationally televised throwing a ball to a guy, does you think that it behooves you to try it at home once or twice so’s you don’t look like a total fucktard?

    but yeah, fuck mayo and mariah.

  113. Auksyte Says:

    i know GB is taken, but i take everyone else off the board who pronounces it that way. i will now add people who pronounce the “t” in “often”. its effing silent people.

  114. Dr. C Says:

    Anyone who fucking stands on an escalator. IT’S NOT A FUCKING AMUSEMENT RIDE. GET ON AND KEEP MOVING!

  115. Mr Snrub Says:

    @ Lebowski. I’m sure he didn’t, and he does seem fairly down to Earth in interviews, but this is irrational hatred, not “perfectly acceptable reasons for hating” and I still think it’s a dumb name.

    If he had any balls he’d order death squads to eliminate anyone who called him that, but he doesn’t so he must like it.

  116. Slash Says:

    I’m pretty sure I’ve mentioned this in other drafts/hatefests, but I fucking hate people who back into parking spaces. Nobody ever has to leave a place so fast that they can’t take the time to back up. They take twice as long to back into a parking space (and still can’t manage to take up less than 1 1/2 spaces) as they would just pulling in the regular way and then backing out when they leave. Backing into a parking space has replaced the popped collar on the polo shirt as the premier signal of the Assholius Americanus species. Every time I see a vehicle that’s been backed into a space, I feel nothing but contempt for the (usually) unseen driver.

  117. Jeff K Says:

    Pedro Martinez.

    I’m pretty sure everyone likes him (even most Red Sawks and Yankee fans), but I loathe the man. He’s just a jerkass who doesn’t give a fuck about his team, he only cares about himself. When the Mets signed him to a FOUR YEAR DEAL, I screamed in agony. I just knew he was going to spend almost the entire time on the DL from random bullshit injuries while cashing the checks from his house in Panama.

    Fuck him in the earhole.

  118. rusrus Says:

    Jimmy Fallon – especially since he’s going to take-over for Conan who’s taking-over for Leno.

    Fuckyou – you’ve been auditioning for the job since you used to throw pencils at the camera during Weekend Update on SNL – shitty Letterman ripoff!

  119. claude balls Says:

    Bon Jovi. The whole fucking band, but especially those John and Richie douchebags. How does that band have any credibility? Uninspired, mediocre bullshit. Yet, lots of people love them, I mean, LUUUVVVV them. Argh.

    Do I have to wait 50 turns to add their entire fanbase to the list, or can I include them all in one big Fuck You?

  120. TDub Says:

    gaht-dammit manny, Mariah was mine. I know african-american men everywhere hate me when I say this but she looks atrocious

  121. Rocco Says:

    Lost. Fuck that show.

  122. Lil Lebowski Urban Achievers Says:

    Mark Cuban. Try being more like Warren Buffett.

    @ Mr Snrub. good call

    @ Mr. Buffett, I will join the impending death squad for $2000/hit. Cash please.

  123. slothrop Says:

    @Slash: Preach it brother. I have to restrain myself from keying cars backed in.

  124. hardawayhatesyou Says:

    Jay fucking Leno.

    He’s not funny, he’s never been funny, and the fact that his show consistently beat Letterman’s shows what morons most people are.

  125. dougery Says:

    pink floyd. Bunch of my friends say i would like them if i just gave them a listen, but absolutely refuse. I’m sure I’ve heard some of their songs on the radio or at parties, etc, but I wouldn’t be able to distinguish them from any of the other songs by bands I don’t know.

    hows that for irrational? I hate something and I don’t even properly know what it is.

  126. TDub Says:

    ooh-ooh-ooh… Tom Cruise. No explanation needed.

  127. Stankonia Says:

    Hillary Clinton.

    I agree with most of her policies, even more than Obama, and she seems like she could do a good job. I just can’t get over the fact that I hate her for no reason at all…

  128. Ted Kennedy's Oncologist Says:

    Wanda Sykes.

    stupid.
    annoying.
    unfunny.
    cunt.

  129. smurphette Says:

    now he is just a douchebag that calls everyone that disagrees with him the worst person in the world

    So he’s the mainstream media version of Drew and Ufford?

    My next pick is Senator Susan Collins. I fucking hate her and her “bipartisan friendship” with Joe Lieberman, and her stupid voice that takes for fucking ever to complete a sentence. Eat shit and die.

  130. Killer of Whales Says:

    Tom Colicchio is a talentless judgemental prick who makes me want to… I dunno, march in a Gay Pride Parade, maybe?

    /seriously, fuck you, Tom Coliccio

  131. Snowflake the Dog Says:

    American Idol. It’s more than a thing, it’s a hate.

  132. manny fresh!! Says:

    @ TDub

    i did my research. of three black dudes polled outside my house this morning, 66% agree while the remaining 33% would fuck her anyway. but that guy was the neighborhood rapist and a former baltimore ravens special teamer.

  133. hardawayhatesyou Says:

    Kids aged 7 and up.

    You’re not cute anymore.

  134. Jeff K Says:

    @Slash

    The “back in” is bad, but I hate the “pull through”. You’re about to pull into a spot and someone takes it from the OTHER SIDE as they pull all the way through so their car is facing outwards. God I can’t stand that.

    And while I don’t hate Tina Fey, I just don’t see what’s so funny about her. She’s just a zero.

  135. claude balls Says:

    I am with Mr. C and Slash, but there is nothing irrational about your respective hatreds. they both are perfectly justified, as would be any murders that result therefrom.

  136. ognihs Says:

    soulja boy – go away. do not come back.

  137. porky1 Says:

    High five, dougery.

    I respect 3-4 of their songs but people who put them up there with the Beatles and Zeppelin are out of their fucking minds.

    And with that, my next pick: Ringo Starr.

    Ringo actually had the balls to imply that since the Beatles may have been the greatest band of all time, and he was the drummer for that band, then he was the greatest rock and roll drummer of all time.

    And he WILL be the last surviving Beatle, put money on it.

  138. Rocco Says:

    @Slash: some people may have pulled through you know.

    Fuck you people who speed and are always in a rush. I’m the guy who drives 55 in the left lane just to piss you off.

    Julie Roberts.

  139. TDub Says:

    @ smurphette,

    and I picked Lieberman, so I think we’ve formed some sort of ineffective alliance against their bipartisanship, or something.

  140. slothrop Says:

    FIGJAM. David Feherty can’t mock him enough in that Crowne Plaza ad.

  141. Dutch Says:

    Chris Berman. The man has never had an original thought in his broadcast career and is a fucking caricature.

  142. DC Says:

    girls with big sunglasses…no one finds it cute that you’re covering up 60% of your face…i’ve made it a policy to automatically assume that there’s something wrong with your face or you have a lazy eye that you don’t want anyone to see. Even worse is the cute girl who wears the big sunglasses…why waste what god gave you?

  143. Biggus Rickus Says:

    Hunter S. Thompson: Sure he’s dead, but he lives on through his works. And I fucking hate, hate, hate his works. I hate everything about his style.

  144. bfreakin3 Says:

    Brett Favre is taken, so i’m going to go to my next NFL pick — Steve Smith (from carolina). initially, it started off as purely from a fantasy football stand point, but when i was forced to defend my stance regularly to some friends, it evolved into full-on hate for the man along with the fantasy football numbers.

  145. Rocco Says:

    Edit: That’s Julia Roberts.

  146. mini dagger Says:

    judd apatow – fuck you and your shitty-ass movies

  147. BigTravATX Says:

    Man i get in late and still get my number one pick:

    Michael Mann. Fucker.

  148. devang Says:

    Bill Maher. Preachy smug asshole who thinks he’s better than the rest of us. News flash douchebag, you’re not. C’mere and lemme show you my Louisville Slugger

  149. smurphette Says:

    @TDub: Wordsies. I hate him, too, but my (or any Dem on the Hill’s) loathing for him is pretty justified.

  150. Naptown Drew Says:

    Larry Bird. Great career in Bahston; but ummm thanks for fucking the Pacers up beyond repair. I routinely turn down free tickets to the games now. And your face looks like a PSA warning about inbreeding.

  151. Juice Springsteen Says:

    Hipsters. Originating from Brooklyn, they came like a swarm up north in their skinny jeans, wolf t-shirts and 80s-era Ray Bans and turned my college campus into a wasteland of ironic detachment. FUCK YOU for making me wade through a wall of cigarette smoke every night just to get to the library. FUCK YOU for scheduling TV on the Radio as a concert. FUCK YOU for not participating in any class I ever had with you and just sneered at everyone who actually gave a shit. I want to take your fucking neck bandana and ram it down your throat.

  152. TDub Says:

    @ Manny,

    those special teamers… they’ll screw anything!

  153. Voice of Unreason Says:

    Just a thought: I’m noticing that a lot of these hate picks are completely rational.

    It should be someone that’s pretty universally liked; there are plenty of people who hate Rachael Ray, Jimmy Fallon, Adam Sandler, etc.

    And wasn’t the idea of the draft to pick individual people, and not “pet peeves”
    (the back-in parker, the cat leash owner) or things (Sunday)?

  154. Lil Lebowski Urban Achievers Says:

    Fast food workers & managers.

    When I ask for ketchup, I expect more than 3 packets you cheap ass punks.

    I’m done irrationally hating….
    Blood drive volunteers
    Fantasy football experts
    American Broadcasting Company
    Bridgette Moynihan
    Dave Chappelle
    The Eagles
    Mark Cuban
    Fast Food workers

  155. Louis Says:

    fucking ray lewis

  156. Slash Says:

    I kinda hate dudes who, when getting off an elevator and see that I’m getting on same elevator, stand there and “hold” the doors open. I guess they think they’re being polite, but a lot of them seem to expect me to express thanks for doing what amounts to standing. The elevator doors aren’t going to immediately snap closed when you step off the elevator. Just fucking get out of the way and I’ll take it from there, thanks. Just for the record, I don’t have a problem with people (men) holding a door open for me, if said door could possibly swing closed and hit me in the face or crush an appendage, thanks for doing me a solid, but the elevator door thing, totally not necessary.

  157. porky1 Says:

    Here’s irrational:

    Bugs Bunny.

    I always wanted Yosemite Sam or Elmer to just splatter his brains.

  158. Stankonia Says:

    @Juice Springsteen

    Amen. That was my next pick.

  159. donkeypuncher Says:

    Jennifer Aniston

  160. camcam Says:

    Plenty of people may hate Adam Sandler, but not nearly enough.

  161. porky1 Says:

    I just realized I picked Bugs Bunny and Michael Jordan. Hmmm.

  162. devang Says:

    Here’s irrational:

    Bugs Bunny.

    I always wanted Yosemite Sam or Elmer to just splatter his brains.

    So says someone named Porky.

  163. slothrop Says:

    Naptown Drew: Value Pick. especially good if you had made a deal to pick him today, but not actually hate him for a year.

  164. RexyBack Says:

    Even though it is not so much as irrational than justified, I am taking the steal of the draft this late into it:

    Dick Cheney.

    1) He once tried to convince the American public he is NOT part of the Executive Branch, being President of the Senate
    2) His Halliburton stock has gone up 3000% in the last year
    3) He, along with Rumsfeld and the Pentagon, convinced George Bush to invade Iraq, while Colin Powell and the CIA were screaming for continuing in Afghanistan and into the Pakistan border
    4) Did I mention his Halliburton stock has gone up 3000% in the last year, helping this cabinet to become the first ever Billion Dollar Cabinet only AFTER becoming elected?

    Despite getting his own monument and dedicated east wing in Hell, I still somehow have an irrational hatred too great for this man.

  165. dougery Says:

    cheese. with the caveat that it is not warm or melted onto something (a la pizza or grilled cheese). cheese is just clammy and cold and it is milk that has gone bad and don’t even like milk that is still good. Oh, so it is goat’s cheese and that will make it better? fuck you.

  166. Mr Snrub Says:

    @ Juice: Hipsters didn’t originate in Brooklyn. They may have a large presence there, but that’s because hipsters, like ancient Hebrews, are a pastoral nomadic people. They roam the country raising their smug douchery (instead of sheep) in certain locations before eventually leaving for a more fertile ground. No one knows where they originate, but they’ll likely be heading to Boise, according to their migratory patterns.

  167. Jersey Says:

    The whole blood giving industry. From the jerkoff nurse who stabs the needle’s with extreme force, to the jerk off who wears the “I just gave blood!” sticker with his arm wrapped in pink prewrap for 2 weeks.

  168. TDub Says:

    pseudo-intellectual College Freshmen.

    Just because you read a little bit of Descartes this semester does not make you any smarter than you were last year when you shelled out 200 bucks for a Jostens class ring.

  169. devang Says:

    To all the incarnations of SuperMike. Fuck you.

  170. crazy joe davola Says:

    People who order cosmos. appletinis and the such. Ties up the god damn bartender when all I want is a beer.

    And related, bartenders who have no fucking clue how to pour a Guiness. If I want that much head, I will go to Hunts Point.

  171. John S. Says:

    Hard to parse out the rational hatred from the irrational hatred, but, I am going to give it a stab:

    David Cross

    His stuff is really funny. He seems like a likable guy in that “nerd friend who can get on your nerve a bit” kind of way. In fact, he was even on Arrested Development, but, for some reason, I LOATHE this guy. Don’t know why, but, when I hear his voice, I cringe.

  172. devin hester's speech coach Says:

    Ugg boots. Is Ugg short for fucking ugly, because that is what those are. 10 years from now chicks that wear those are going to look back and wonder what the hell they were doing.

  173. superguard9 Says:

    Chipper Jones

    Fuck you for naming your kid Shea.

  174. devang Says:

    @crazy joe davola

    Spot On.

  175. Dan From Chicago Says:

    Every pro player who in the middle of their contract wants more money and says they won’t play/report/show up until they get it – you know what, fuck all of you in the ass with a giant red wood tree. In the real world, the boss would tell you ok, don’t bother coming back. Greedy pricks.

  176. camcam Says:

    Wyclef. Just seems like an asshole.

  177. Rocco Says:

    @RexyBack: I know of no one who likes Cheney. Justified? Yes. Judges ruling?

  178. Mr Snrub Says:

    @John S. Great pick, I think that counts as irrational.

    Next pick is Jon Stewart. I enjoy The Daily Show, but Stewart’s just been rubbing me the wrong way for awhile now.

  179. Slash Says:

    RE Jeff K Says:
    The “back in” is bad, but I hate the “pull through”. You’re about to pull into a spot and someone takes it from the OTHER SIDE as they pull all the way through so their car is facing outwards. God I can’t stand that.

    I actually don’t mind the pull through, I do it myself sometimes. And you can tell the difference between someone who’s pulled forward and someone who’s backed in. The backed in vehicles are almost always crooked.

    RE Voice of Unreason: I specified “people who do these things.” The guideline didn’t say the hatred had to be of famous people. I just can’t think of any beloved celebrities that I hate or celebrities that haven’t already been established as worthy of robust hatred (Trump, O’Reilly, Bush, Rachael Ray, Mariah Carey, Hilton, etc.). I dislike most of those people too, but they were taken.

    I know we’ve done a peeve draft. If I can come up with a famous person I really genuinely hate that isn’t universally despised, I’ll put it up.

  180. futuremrsrickankiel Says:

    I fucking hate Scarlett Johansson. Staring vacantly at the camera with your mouth open is not goddamn acting, you vapid dipshit. Oh, and you ain’t fooling me. I know you’re not a natural blonde. She’s very pretty, but I simply CANNOT fathom how this dumb piece of shit somehow weaseled her way into “serious actress” status.

  181. Joel Says:

    Bill Paxton. How an actor his worthless has been in so many big hits and now his own HBO series just makes me wonder, who do you have to blow to get gigs like he’s gotten, in Hollywood. Answer: Ask Bill Paxton.

  182. Rocco Says:

    Ugg boots have to be the ugliest things ever, don’t look good on anyone, and should be banned.

  183. dougery Says:

    @ Voice of Unreason.

    am completely with you on the most of these picks being perfectly rational. But I just shrug and say give the people what they want, a thread to express their hatred for sometimes obvious things.

    Regarding your other point, when the post mentioned the entire city of Indianapolis I first read that as the physical entity, its people and architecture and everything, so I figured Sundays and Cheese were fair game. I have since re-read the original post at definitely does seem more geared toward individual people or groups of similar persons. So I may be in the wrong…

  184. johndewar Says:

    Sports: The show “PTI”. Most. Overrated. Shit. Ever.

    Non-sports: Please, please, PLEASE stop forcing Sarah Silverman on me and telling me she’s funny.

  185. TDub Says:

    @ Rexy and Rocco,

    I’m gonna say it doesn’t count… if you can make a cogent argument for why he’s so hateful (and you can), I’m not sure it fits in this draft. Same reason as Bill O’ Reilley

  186. ognihs Says:

    gregg popovich – eat dick, robot

  187. slothrop Says:

    Sure to popular with CC, but here goes: Scarlett Johansson. Go away and stop fucking up Waits’ music.

  188. Rocco Says:

    Can we draft soon-to-be ex-wives? Or is that too rational?

  189. Joey Jo-Jo Jr Shabadoo Says:

    Wow, no one took Coldplay? I can’t believe people actually like this shit they call music

  190. crazy joe davola Says:

    Men who wear crocs.

  191. Upstate Underdog Says:

    @futuremrs, I think Ufford (Captain Caveman) may have just crossed you off his Christmas card list.

  192. The Incredible Fulk Says:

    I know everybody hates Derek Jeter, so it might not qualify, but since I am a diehard Yankee fan, my hatred of Jeter should certainly qualify. I hate his perfect reputation and automatic first-ballot HOF assumption, meanwhile he’s nothing but a glorified singles hitter. All he does is bang tons of chicks and skip out on his taxes, yet he’s a hero to millions of kids. He’s got nothing remotely half-interesting to say to anyone on any subject. Everybody talks about moving him off SS, but he doesn’t have the bat to play anywhere but 2B, and Cano is already better than him, early season slump notwithstanding. His stupid overexaggerated ass bend at every slightly inside pitch. Oh yeah and FUCK “are you suuuuure you’re not a shortstop” and “Jeter? Oh he’s DEFINITELY got an Edge.” But what I hate most about him? That I have to root for him.

  193. Juice Springsteen Says:

    The Allman Brothers Band.

    Now, I do like the Allman Bros. What I can’t stand is how they take four minutes to finish every song they play. End it already! How stoned do you think I actually am?

  194. Mr Snrub Says:

    @ futuremrs: Good one, she’s become incredibly overrated since Lost In Translation. Go back and watch Ghost World, Thora Birch completely owns that movie in every way, yet she can’t seemingly get work anymore while Scarlett becomes the symbol of a generation of dumb cokehead hipster bitches. I don’t understand it © L.

  195. MDZ Says:

    LeBron James. Even though he’s one of the top 3 players in the NBA, he’s squandering his talent. The guy can not be guarded in the paint. He has good post moves, but is way too content to fire up guarded threes. Sure he’s young, but he’s wasting his career. Plus, his sycophantic attachment to Jay Z is disturbing for a guy trying to become the next great one. Sure, MJ had Nike, but the difference is that MJ made Nike a corporate powerhouse instead of just being Phil Knight’s lackey.

  196. futuremrsrickankiel Says:

    Or really deserving targets like Patriots fans, Patriots players and Patriot Pat.

    I feed off your hate.

  197. slothrop Says:

    @futuremrsrickankiel–shit. f5, fucker.

  198. TDub Says:

    Dovetailing with Johndewar’s point… I’m going with the irrational hatred of this new “forced argument” phenomneon on television shows. Stop screaming. Stop always somehow landing on opposite sides of a topic. These assholes could find a way to argue about whether World War II worked out for Germany.

  199. el domingo Says:

    if i ever saw hilary swank i would probably stab her while like in a momentary blacked out stupor and them come to, covered in blood and handcuffed being dragged somewhere and say “wait – what happened? where am i?”

  200. denvergodfather Says:

    The Road Runner. As a child it would ruin my day that the fucking coyote couldn’t catch that piece of shit.

  201. Rocco Says:

    Jason Whitlock.

  202. Naptown Drew Says:

    @futuremrs

    I was just about to draft her. For the record, I don’t really think she’s that pretty. She kinda looks like a rat, but with big boobs. Also, she gave up her life of whoring to marry Van Wilder (almost a certain douche), and she obliterated Tom Waits songs.

  203. fatboyslim Says:

    Shaq.you are not funny you fat fuck. Make a goddamn freethrow!

  204. Ssswayze Says:

    Florida. The whole state.

  205. futuremrsrickankiel Says:

    Can I draft the entire cast of “Friends”? And by “draft” I mean “kill via poisoning with polonium-210, which is what the KGB uses to kill dissenters and is reputedly extremely slow-acting and agonizingly painful”?

  206. Upstate Underdog Says:

    celebrities that threaten to move to Europe or Canada if their presidential candidate loses. Please leave.

  207. Slash Says:

    Still trying to come up with a well-known person to hate, but in the meantime, I fucking hate people who say “We just” when they pray. I am not often in the company of religious people (by choice), but sometimes they can’t be avoided, such as at family holidays/gatherings. I dislike the praying thing before a meal anyway, but it’s usually brief, so whatever. But then the asshat doing the praying throws in “We just” every 5 words: “Father, we just thank you for this food and this day, and we just pray for the health and safety of everyone here today and we just…” I cannot figure out why they do this. It doesn’t even make any goddamn sense.

    My mother does this. And every time she says “we just,” I inwardly cringe and long to tell her to shut the fuck up if she can’t talk normally. Lots of people do this, they must learn it at some fucking Jesus freak seminar. I hate every one of them.

  208. Naptown Drew Says:

    Madonna. You can’t sing, your acting sucks, and you suddenly have a British accent? Go adopt AIDS.

  209. Juice Springsteen Says:

    @ Fulk: I completely agree as a Yankees fan. Ever notice how last playoffs everyone harped about A-Rod’s classically shitty performance, and yet Jeter actually had a worse line and got a free pass? He hit into three double plays against the Indians and everyone still slobbered his knob.

  210. Upstate Underdog Says:

    sorry futuremrs, I drafted them with my 2nd pick at 11:38am

  211. Mr Snrub Says:

    David Chase. Not for the ending (which I liked,) but for the whole show really not being that good to begin with. And because he seems like a douche, but without enough credibility to be one (like David Simon.)

  212. Otto Man Says:

    A subset of UU’s last one, let me pick Jane Fonda.

    No one on your side of the political divide gives a shit what you think, and your asshattery only pisses off the other side. You’re not helping.

    Sit down and shut up, or we’re going to force you to return to that weed-whacker haircut you had in “Klute.”

  213. TDub Says:

    Slash,

    maybe “we just” is the “um” of praying. But thank you for making me notice that now… Thanksgiving is gonna suck now.

  214. Joey Jo-Jo Jr Shabadoo Says:

    That stupid Domino’s Pizza Noid. When I was younger I wanted to kill that thing. They even made a video game after this stupid character, worst game ever!

  215. Dr. Fünke’s 100 Percent Natural Good-Time Family Band Solution Says:

    Anybody that doesn’t pull out into the intersection when they’re making a fucking left. Pull out bitch, that way I can put 1 inch of my car past the stop bar, and be totally justified when I turn on red.

  216. futuremrsrickankiel Says:

    Ohh denvergodfather that was a NICE pull. That smug stupid bird. I hate him too!

  217. SonOfSpam Says:

    Michael Jackson.

    Great artist and all; there’s just something a little unsettling about his fascination with children. I mean, I’m probably being paranoid, but I don’t think I’d want my kid staying at that ranch. Sorry if that sounds racist.

  218. Otto Man Says:

    Denvergodfather: I always felt the same way about Jerry from “Tom and Jerry” as a kid.

    You’re a diseased rodent stealing food from this family and tormenting their pet, and I’m supposed to root for you? WTF?

  219. Mike Says:

    Damn, it’s late and I can still get my first choice: Ellen Page. This is pure, full-blown irrational hatred. Juno grates on my soul. “Look at how indie I am! And quirky!” I spent the entire movie mocking her and hoping for more bad things to happen to her. This nearly ruined a friendship, because one of my female friends who was watching with me loves the movie and Page. Goddammit, I’m getting worked up just thinking about it. Want to punch that bitch in the face.

  220. Juice Springsteen Says:

    Kevin Faulk, RB, NE.

    You don’t bang supermodels. You don’t target married MILFs. You don’t appear in unfunny Visa commericals. You are nonwhite therefore not a fan favorite of the NE faithful. You don’t mention the construda. By all accounts, you should be the most likable Patriot around. But because you reliably murder my team two sundays a year with inexplicable first downs, I hope your bone marrow turns into steamed okra.

    Besides, isn’t he the only patriot left who we haven’t hated on here?

  221. DanGleesack Says:

    Kark Malone

    I know I should probably show him some semblance of respect for being the only black man in Utah for over a decade, but I can’t bring myself to do it.

  222. wrecking_ball Says:

    “I loove black people, but I haaate ______s.”

    /Chris Rocked

  223. DanGleesack Says:

    Karl*

  224. Rocco Says:

    Organized religion.

  225. The Incredible Fulk Says:

    @Springsteen: 3 for 17 with no walks nor extra base hits, my friend. But of course, the best was the great A-Rod choke of 2004, when Derek tried to carry the team on his back with his 200/333/233 line. If not for A-Rod’s 894 OPS that series, they surely would have won the title. Oh, and while looking that up I saw Jeter’s middle name is Sanderson. That’s it, final strike. I am now openly rooting against him.

  226. putridstinkstar Says:

    Aerosmith

  227. futuremrsrickankiel Says:

    Sorry, UU! Can we keep the plutonium-210 poisoning, though?

    Um. I don’t want to look like I’m just shooting down all the hot chicks. But I hate Erin Andrews. Bitch openly admitted she didn’t know her shit when she got her first reporting gig. Goddamn it, there are plenty of chicks out there (AHEM) who DO know their shit and would fucking kill for your job. You do us all a disservice by publicly airing your ignorance. Oh, and if you weren’t on TV no one would notice you because you look like a soccer mom/diner waitress/chick who was hot in high school but then married too young and now has no life. I don’t want her to, like, DIE, but I don’t want her to have a fucking job anymore ever.

  228. Slash Says:

    I don’t think this is irrational, and probably lots of people would agree, but I do hate Willard Scott. What the fuck is he still on TV for? To wish happy birthday to really old people and… that’s it? Goddamn, he’s creepy. If he were one day arrested for some loathsome sex offense, it wouldn’t even surprise me.

  229. Joey Jo-Jo Jr Shabadoo Says:

    People who pop their collars aka douchebags…I know this is an easy one, but fuck them.

  230. devin hester's speech coach Says:

    Alf. Absolutely no rational explanation, but he annoyed the shit out of me.

  231. Otto Man Says:

    I second the Willard Scott pick. He’s always given off a John Wayne Gacy vibe.

    To steal a line Bill Hicks used against Jesse Helms, when he dies his wife will tell the press, “you know, I always wondered about Willard’s collection of little shoes…”

  232. porky1 Says:

    Jessica Alba. Even more than Scarlett.

    At least Scarlett occasionally picks good projects. Alba’s got the double whammy of Can’t Act/Shit Flix. Seeing her glaze-eye her way through the Fantastic Four movie looking like the “blonde” Latinas I see at the swap meet was infuriating…

    …hey wait, can I change my pick to the douche from Nip/Tuck who made Dr. Doom look like a metrosexual cocknobbler?

  233. Clare Says:

    227 comments and nobody’s made my pick yet? YES!

    Paul Fucking McCartney. I hate that douchebag and his terrible eye job, ridiculous dyed hair, cunty ex wives, and whiny vegan daughter. It doesn’t help that all his Beatles songs suck, too.

  234. Brady's a Douchebag Says:

    I’ll take Mel Kiper, Jr. and his never out-of-place hair and shove him up Chris Mortensen’s ass. I just hit a real value pick–the cocky douchebag exacta.

  235. Mr Snrub Says:

    Zach Braff. And I like Scrubs and enjoyed Garden State, but fuck this dude. He annoys me to no end.

  236. Upstate Underdog Says:

    @futuremrs, the Po-210 stays or any other similar alpha emitting radioisotope will suffice. radiation poisoning is a bitch.

  237. porky1 Says:

    Clare: I vacillated between Ringo and Paul, especially since Paul upped his “douche factor” when he switched songwriting credits on his live album to “McCartney/Lennon.”

    I went with Ringo because Paul DID write “Blackbird.” Can’t fault him for that.

  238. superguard9 Says:

    Tweety Bird

    Not for the stupid shit he did to the cat but for those awful t-shirts ugly fat chicks like to wear that say things like “Don’t go there, girlfriend!” or some other inane phrase

  239. Billg Says:

    If allowed, I will go with all of the no talent, golddigging, attention whores like Lohan, Hilton (already chosen), etc.

    Where do they come off that they are so great…….you are drunk, coke-heads. Get over it!

    And I will included all of their fans who’s lives would end without them!

  240. TDub Says:

    Slash,

    I think that Willard Scott is a necrophile, hence the birthdays and the creepiness.

  241. Cheech Says:

    drew barrymore. absolutely awful.

  242. Brady's a Douchebag Says:

    While we’re at it-Mr. Oreo Doublestuff himself, Wayne Brady. Could also add Bryant and Greg Gumbel to that description and let them fuck Brent Mussberger up the ass.

  243. TDub Says:

    THANK YOU CHEECH, Drew Barrymore has never been hot, NEVER! She looks like she tried to run a 40 yard dash in a 30 yard gym.

  244. denvergodfather Says:

    @ Otto man – You are right on about the litte rat. I also rooted for Tom to eat him for lunch. Freaking Tweety bird too. I think I watch too many cartoons as a kid.

  245. jenny Says:

    i would’ve taken joe buck, but apparently there’s nothing irrational about wishing the guy chokes on it on live tv. instead i’ll go with nic cage – i fear the day he and tom cruise appear in a movie together. and if they already have, don’t tell me. their lives may depend on it.

  246. Smurftastic Says:

    Jennifer Garner

  247. nashville steeler fan Says:

    Terri McCullough..i just want whack him upside the head every time he says..we can still win…

  248. TDub Says:

    Tucker Carlson.

    Fuck your bowtie.

  249. Billg Says:

    F Mrs. Jennifer Garner too!

  250. Veritas Says:

    Kevin Smith. I’m begging you, just stop making movies.

  251. Upstate Underdog Says:

    Matthew Broderick, he just seems like a little pussy not to mention he chose to bang horse face Parker for the rest of his life.

  252. Kccal Says:

    Amy Poehler is easily the most annoying entertainer in the world.

  253. A Fastidious Hat Says:

    @Mr. Snrub, don’t go back and watch Ghost World at all because it’s a long, dumb, boring fucking movie that I hate almost enough to be on this list. My hatred of that movie is not irrational, though.

    I can’t stand Uma Thurman. Just can’t fucking stand her for no goddamn good reason.

  254. porky1 Says:

    Seth Green. Or Jamie Kennedy. What’s the fucking difference???

    Fuck it, they’re the same guy, both unfunny, annoying, and somehow successful. I declare that this counts as one pick.

  255. Joey Jo-Jo Jr Shabadoo Says:

    Starbucks. Coffee sucks, and the people that go there who act sophisticated because they paid nine dollars for a fucking coffee can eat a dick

  256. Smurftastic Says:

    Oh Uma Thurman is AWFUL! Good call, A Fastidious Hat.

    I was going to take Tobey Maguire with my next pick, but instead I shall take everyone involved in any of the Spiderman movies and the nerds who got super nerd boners over the movies (after the first one… which was watchable, but not great). Spiderman is a pretty awful superhero, and Tobey was pretty much the worst person ever to have been picked to play him.

  257. Dan From Chicago Says:

    Al Gore – Mr Fucking Global Warming if there was global warming, your wife’s ass would thaw out in a heart beat – lying bastard – The next time it hits 20 below, I’ll think of you as I shovel my snow or the next time I have to sit and watch a baseball game wearing a winter coat, hat and gloves. Your bullshit ideas have been debunked to the Nth power – now go back to doing what you do best, acting like a F’n Cigar Store Indian.

  258. sdbruin Says:

    all political bumper stickers. I don’t fucking care if you think Bush sucks or that I shouldn’t blame you because you voted for Gore. Fuck off, go die. In fact, eliminate ALL bumper stickers. They make your car look like the equivalent of a neatly pressed white dress shirt with a massive coffee stain down the front.

  259. Juice Springsteen Says:

    This was a wavering pick, but I have to go with “Baba O’Reilly” by the Who in a squeaker over “Sweet Home Alabama”. I remember in my senior year of high school, that song became the designated pick for the Ugg and miniskirt crowd to sing–just to prove that they weren’t ass-slaves to Top 40 radio. “Ohmigod! I love ‘Teenage Wasteland’! Bummmm……bum bummmmmmmmm!” Stupid bitches. It’s the weakest song on “Who’s Next”. Die.

  260. denvergodfather Says:

    How about Britney Spears. What the fuck. Used to be hot now i wouldn’t hump her for money. She walks around in her cloud of crazy like she owns the world, I can’t wait for her to die in a car accident or a drug over dose. Can’t wait.

  261. Mr Snrub Says:

    @ Fastidious. Ehh, I liked it. Buscemi and Thora were both lights out and there were enough funny lines to get through some of the dumb shit.

    Cameron Diaz. Hasn’t been in anything good since Something About Mary, hasn’t looked good since The Mask. Also, seems retarded.

  262. Rocco Says:

    Tim Hortons. The Starbucks of WNY and Canada. I hate coffee and I hate coffee drinkers. Especially coffee drinkers who want to give me tips on exercise and healthy eating. YOU DRINK 9 FUCKING CUPS OF COFFEE A DAY! Fuck you. I’m still in shape 8 years after college. And your fucking 30 car line in the morning fucks up the right lane on every street in town. Fuck you Tim Hortons.

  263. Gregathon Says:

    Myself.
    I mean, I am a great guy and everything.
    But when I catch a glimpse of this dude in the mirror and I just want to fuck him up

  264. Jackson Says:

    Can I pick Dan from Chicago? There’s no way anyone that stupid is real.

    By your “logic,” night doesn’t exist because it’s sunny out right now.

    And by “debunked to the Nth degree,” I assume you mean “99% of accredited scientists agree with Gore and two Exxon-funded quacks disagree.” Take off the tinfoil hat, buddy.

  265. Slash Says:

    K, I didn’t used to hate Kim Kardashian, but now I do, since she’s everywhere. And because her undeserved fame gave them an entrance onto the national stage, I hate her whole fucking family too, including Bruce Jenner. What a waste of oxygen all those people are. Jesus, is she really famous for having a giant ass? By that rationale, half the women in America should have a show on E.

    I don’t hate her dead father. So he was OJ’s lawyer, big fucking deal. Someone had to do it.

  266. futuremrsrickankiel Says:

    I hate Christmas Ape.

  267. Dan From Chicago Says:

    I hate when Hines no smire.

  268. Global Warming Says:

    Al Gore…don’t know why

  269. Joey Jo-Jo Jr Shabadoo Says:

    @ Dan

    Good pick I can’t believe I forgot to pick Al Gore

  270. Otto Man Says:

    I have to call a foul on Jaime Kennedy. I’ve never met anyone who likes him.

    I can only assume his Hollywood career is due to the fact that he has pictures of studio heads blowing goats.

  271. Hollywood Says:

    Phil Jackson.

    The “Zen Master?” Hey Phil, fuck you and your stupid goatee.

    Don’t get me wrong – I’m quite happy that the Lakers eliminated the fagtastic Spurs…mainly because I’m done having to watch Tony Parker flop around like an Italian Soccer Player every time someone breathes on him while Tim Duncan whines incessantly at the officials.

    But, I’m sick of the verbal fellatio that all these guys give Phil Jackson: “he’s the greatest coach ever” etc. Tell you what, I could have coached those Bulls teams to championships and here’s what my huge inspirational speech would have been:

    “Hey Michael, go win the game.”

    Simple enough.

  272. Smurftastic Says:

    Quentin Tarantino.

    OK the movies are entertaining, and every guy I know is OBSESSED… but seriously. How can you see the guy and hear him talk and not want to shove a redwood up his ass?

    False, his ass can stay clear… but good god we need to do something to keep him from opening his goddamn self congratulating coked out mouth.

  273. mr. incognito Says:

    Barrack Obama

  274. porky1 Says:

    Then Seth Green it is, Otto.

    Robot Chicken is Not Fucking Funny.

    And with my next pick, speaking of Not Fucking Funny, I cannot believe I get the steal of the draft…

    Ashton Kutcher.

  275. Billg Says:

    Romo……another Crowned Loser

  276. Rocco Says:

    Kim Kardashian’s ass is nightmare fuel. Her Playboy pictorial was just wrong.

  277. Ryno Says:

    The motherfucker that adds 15 different types of protein powders to his smoothie at Smoothie King.

    You fucking loser, Turbinado isn’t going to get you an audition on “So you think you can dance?” Just order your strawberry orange smoothie and let me order.

    Jesus tapdancing christ…

  278. Mr Snrub Says:

    @ SMurftastic: Good pick, I forgot about Tarantino because most people I know can’t stand him anymore, although he still does have a ton of fans (see, anywhere on the internet that talks about movies.)

  279. Upstate Underdog Says:

    @Rocco, black coffee is a relatively healthy drink. I love black coffee, but I agree with you a little bit when it comes to people that order that flavored bullshit coffee that is like drinking a liquid candy bar.

  280. Global Warming Says:

    kutcher should have gone #1 if not for the fact that a lot of the hate is rational…dropped his draft value

  281. Dan From Chicago Says:

    @ Jackson – no. You may not. A generation ago, it was global cooling – did someone turn up the thermostat and make things warm? I don’t want to get into an intellectual debate as this is not the forum – unless it involved intellectual dick jokes – if there is such a thing. As for the foil hat, not my style, I’ll leave that up to the junk scientists.

  282. TDub Says:

    @ Jackson,

    I kind of agree with you. I don’t get how something that has scientific backing is so politically polarizing BUT FOR the fact that Al Gore is the drum-banger on it. That’s why I excuse Dan a little bit. Al Gore is hateful because he only brings the issue up when there are no political reprecussions stemming from it, that’s a dickless move.

  283. denvergodfather Says:

    Brian Griese. Fuck off second stringer.

  284. Peter North Says:

    Lexington Steele. Anyone ever seen any of his movies? Guy is hung like a baby’s arm holding a softball but, holy shit, do we need the 2 straight minutes of groaning at 120 decibels?

    Ya, we get it, you just tore that poor asian chick apart, but enough already.

    Also, anyone else in Canada ever heard those radio ads where the guy goes “Hi, this is Matt from in-charge debt solutions and I can help you get out of debt.” If I ever meet Matt, he’s fuckin’ done son. What an annoying asshole.

  285. Gregathon Says:

    Oh yeah;
    and fucking Ice Cream Trucks…
    destroying my sleep at 1 o’clock in the afternoon with ‘Music Box Dancer’ and ‘Turkey in the Raw’.
    There’s even one where when the music stops, an Ethel Mermanesque voice goes ‘Helloo?’…
    All for a $3 fucking soft-serve cone.
    Fuck Brooklyn

  286. TDub Says:

    And boobies and ass

  287. Upstate Underdog Says:

    Keith Olberman has just named Dan from Chicago the “worst person in the world.”

  288. Francois Leroux Speedskater Says:

    Ben Roethlisberger. Guy put my favorite team on his back all the way to the SB and managed to get out of the way enough for them to win it…but all reports I’ve heard from Average Joes in and around PGH say that he is a douche of epic proportions. I’m inclined to agree.

    Oh, and if he embellishes another injury to make it look like he’s playing through a goddamn leg amputation I will finish the job that Chrysler LHS started. Cock eating fuck.

  289. Mr Snrub Says:

    Jamie Foxx. Yeah, you need to go now.

  290. Dan From Chicago Says:

    @ UU – Thanks – can’t wait to see what the trophy looks like.

  291. porky1 Says:

    I make my SECOND steal pick before lunch…just call me Jerry west.

    Justin Timberlake.

    Nice little career Timbaland eked out for you, eh?

  292. jenny Says:

    @ smurftastic

    as a girl, i do have to own up to a tarantino obsession. however, the guy needs to keep his mug out of his own movies.

  293. Smurftastic Says:

    Angelina Jolie.

    Guys think she’s hot because she looks like a stripper who would give you a beej for an extra $1. Just because you have 17,000 kids (twins born today too) and are a UN Ambassador doesn’t make me forget that you once wore a vial of Billy Bob Thornton’s blood around your neck, you skank.

  294. Steve Says:

    William Shatner. Go fuck yourself. That guy is such a corporate whore it’s not even funny. I swear, he’d go on TV and do a commerical for maxi-pads if someone paid him. Someone tell him that he stopped being Captain Kirk decades ago and now he’s a fat useless fuck.

  295. Otto Man Says:

    There’s even one where when the music stops, an Ethel Mermanesque voice goes ‘Helloo?’…

    Holy shit, there’s one of those that circles our park too. It’s so fucking annoying I actually went out and told the guy to turn off the music.

    If Hell has a theme song, that’s it.

  296. Slash Says:

    I kinda hate Hugh Hefner. Not because he objectifies women or bangs women who could be his great-granddaughters (on the first, who doesn’t, and on the second, who wouldn’t if they could?), but because everybody kisses his ass and acts like he invented pictures of naked women. There have been pictures of naked women since there were naked women, he didn’t invent anything. He’s not a pioneer, just a high-end smut peddler.

    Also, take off that fucking cap. You’re not Thurston Howell III. And the robe bothers me, too. Would it really kill you to put on a goddam t-shirt?

    And last, you’re not hot and never were, even when you were young. The only reason you get 20-year-old ass now is because you’re rich.

  297. TDub Says:

    The 4 guys playing in a barn from the Viva Viagra commercial. Are they playing this song before they engage in a six hour long orgy in the barn… I just don’t get it.

  298. Billg Says:

    The entire cast of that horrible show “Saved by the Bell”. Especially that Dustin Diamond. Way to milk a crappy character for the rest of your pathetic life!

  299. Chris - Bess Mervin Says:

    Whoa I step out to look at some porn and come back and the whole damn thing is almost over with.

    Well I am going to take David Blane – Fuck You and your guyliner.

  300. Gut Out Says:

    Ken Burns – I’ve never seen one of his pretentious, boring, nancy-boy shows, and I never will. But I hate him just the same. I’d kick him in the crotch if I ever saw him and then give him a wedgie and a nougie.

  301. TDub Says:

    @ Billg:

    BLASPHEMY! that show taught generation Y how to grow up, and how to love. It taught us how to be cool, man.

  302. Slash Says:

    Just remembered how much I hate the fucking OxyClean guy. I hate him so much. I really kinda wish he would die. Why does he scream?

  303. devin hester's speech coach Says:

    The University of Michigan Marching Band. I fucking hate “Hail to the Victors.”

  304. futuremrsrickankiel Says:

    Bravo, Gut Out. The “Jazz” series was one of the biggest loads of musical horseshit I’ve ever seen. Including swing music and barely mentioning, say, Oscar Peterson? That’s like making a series about country and hyping Tim McGraw over Uncle Tupelo. I liked “Baseball,” but he should have quit after that.

  305. Otto Man Says:

    I’ll agree that Al Gore is a horrible face — a fat, horrible face — for the global warming issue, but if you somehow think it’s a hoax perpetrated by “quack scientists,” then yes, you are in fact an unbelievable idiot and you deserve to be mocked as much as someone who believes in alchemy or leeching or Matt Millen.

  306. Brady's a Douchebag Says:

    How the hell are Double J and Marmalard still on the board–those smug, self-righteous, cocky motherfuckers.

  307. Chris - Bess Mervin Says:

    anybody that went to LSU

  308. Otto Man Says:

    Whoa I step out to look at some porn

    You have a special room for that? Well, lah-dee-dah, Mr. Too Good to Use the Public Library.

  309. Rocco Says:

    Chriss Angel. I don’t know if anyone likes him but he can get off TV.

  310. Brady's a Douchebag Says:

    @Otto Man
    Your face would be terrible as well if you had to fuck Tipper. Not that Al isn’t a fuckwad anyway well before he got on his high horse.

  311. sdbruin Says:

    this one might hurt a few of you, but irrational is irrational: Reggae. Hate hate HATE it for no real reason. Everyone loves it, and it all sounds the same to me. Sometimes I think people listen to it because they feel they HAVE to in order to be thought of as peaceful and just. Every Bob Marley record could disappear and I’d have no problem with it.

  312. Smurftastic Says:

    Ok. Definitely going to hell for this pick.

    Lance Armstrong.

    Yes, I’m glad you beat cancer. And yes, I once even owned a livestrong bracelet. But holy overexposure Batman! Now this guy is buddy up w/ a shirtless Matthew McCon and making out with an Olsen twin in a bar? SERIOUSLY? WHO WATCHES BIKE RACING ANYWAY!

    However, I will take him out in a nonpainful way to acknowledge his super chill cameo in Dodgeball.

  313. denvergodfather Says:

    ladainian tomlinson. Little cry baby bitch. I hope he breaks both of his legs.

  314. denvergodfather Says:

    I am not waiting beacuse I will forget. Andy mother fucking Dick. Isn’t he due for an overdose of cocaine and cock.

  315. John John The Bastard Says:

    I pick Kevin O’neill for fucking up a potentially great Arizona Wildcats basketball team by trying to slow them down and have them play possesion basketball. That team was a track team goddamit!!

  316. Hollywood Says:

    Oh oh oh, Wilford Brimley! Fuck I hate you for making Cocoon 2…and for your Quaker Oats commercials.

  317. mini dagger Says:

    the guy from the UPS whiteboard ads.

    I’ve heard that advertising campaign been described as brilliant. fuck. that. everytime I see that shit-for-brains I want to duct-tape him to a chair, shave his stupid hair off, and shove magic markets down his throat hole. why? I have no idea., but I suppose that’s the point.

  318. Dan From Chicago Says:

    @ Otto – Careful in the library – never know when Carl Monday will be around.

  319. Kyle Orton's out of work mach3 Says:

    Led Zeppelin, seriously I just don’t get why evryone is on their jock the entire first cd was ripped of soul music. whatever though

  320. TDub Says:

    Kathy Griffin. FTW

  321. Otto Man Says:

    Your face would be terrible as well if you had to fuck Tipper.

    I still have nightmares about their kiss at the 2000 DNC. *shudder*

    Oh oh oh, Wilford Brimley!

    If you’ve never seen the “Strangers with Candy” episode with his audiobook, go find it now.

  322. Rocco Says:

    Ohio State University.

  323. johnny Says:

    Any celebrity with a cameo on Engtourage. What’s that Snoop, you bumped into Vinnie Chase at the mall? Why not give him a 5-step handshake and tell him you should collaborate on some new material?

  324. Mr Snrub Says:

    Kurt Loder. He knows why

  325. Smurftastic Says:

    @Rocco… that was next on my board… nice pick. Anyone who puts THE in front of your name deserves to die… especially those cocky douches from OSU. Congratulations on your substandard education at THE OSU, douchebags.

    For my next pick, I take Ellen Degeneres. I have no hard feelings, and she seems to be the unassuming anti Oprah (PS suck a dick, Oprah), but the dancing. It’s the dancing that puts her on my list.

  326. Otto Man Says:

    Ohio State University.

    If only for the cockgobblers on MNF who stress the “THE” when they give their school.

    Hooray, you’re attending the main state university in Ohio. Why not brag about fucking the hottest chick in the special ed class while you’re at it?

  327. Kyle Orton's out of work mach3 Says:

    Judd Apatow and his whole troupe. 40 year old virgin= hilarious. each other movie just got less and less funny and while i am on director’s M. Night Shyamalan and Spielberg too

  328. Chris - Bess Mervin Says:

    @Otto – By step out I meant opened another tab in firefox.

    Also( and I know I am going to get kicked in the balls by smurphette for saying it this way) that Mexican or Indian looking chick from the office. I hate you.

  329. Tech N9ne's Tribute to Falco Says:

    @ Smurftastic – you don’t “beat” cancer unless you’re Russell Crowe.

    I take U2’s The Edge.

    “Ooh I’m so whimsically taciturn”

    Fuck you.

  330. Jim U. Says:

    Steve Jobs – Enough with the turtlenecks you self-righteous doucebag.

  331. TDub Says:

    Sorry Kyle, Apatow’s off he list. You pick worse than you throw!

  332. Kyle Orton's out of work mach3 Says:

    @ TDUB – my fault came in late to this one, and even i don’t want to see myself start this season.

  333. Hank Scorpio Says:

    Kyle Korver – a cross between Ashton Kutcher and Billy Bob Thornton.

    MMMmmmm, I think I’ll get AI some french fried pertaters…

  334. Tech N9ne's Tribute to Falco Says:

    Republicans that listen to Phish.

    Anyone that takes kayaking seriously.

  335. smaaron Says:

    The Al Gore pick is great. Incovenient Truth wasn’t about the climate and the earth and global warming.

    It was cock full Al Gore and Al Gore doing a PowerPoint presentation.

    Make it about the issue and I might care. Make it about yourself and you get people like me wanting to pistol whip you while wasting energy.

  336. cannon fire Says:

    Joe Gibbs. I’m not sure why. I’m not sure if it’s the NASCAR connection, the reach around from the DC press, or the whole JC freak thing. But I hate him.

  337. Foozer from Calgary Says:

    I’m thinking I’ve got a fantastic late round steal with:

    Nancy Grace.

    Take your fear mongering, fake hate and shove it up your ass

  338. Smurftastic Says:

    Per special request from my friend who works at a real job where he can’t participate, I take Rod Stewart

  339. TDub Says:

    Foozer=draft winner

  340. acewhiplash Says:

    Steve “Get Smart” Carell.

    Not only is he overexposed and starring in horribly named films that co-star Dane Cook (Dan in Real Life), but I hate that in his leading man movie roles he uses the same mannerisms as Michael Scott, but whereas in The Office they reveal what a horrible douche and tyrant he is–in the movies they are supposed to be charming and quirky.

    Steve, Will Ferrell just called. He wants his one-trick pony back. It’s John C. O’Reilly’s turn to ride it off into the sunset.

  341. TDub Says:

    Kyle,

    as a Vikings fan, I can’t wait til you start underthrowing four yard fade routes.

  342. Rocco Says:

    Rod Stewart reminds of another pick I wanted to make…Neil Diamond. You suck. Go away.

  343. Tuck Fexas Says:

    Bill Simmons…nuff said

  344. Hakim Drops the Ball Says:

    Really surprised nobody mentioned George Lucas yet.

    The guy hasn’t made a good or great movie since 1983 for fuck’s sake, ruined one of my beloved film franchises and helped turn Indiana Jones into mediocre dreck.

    I’d choke the man if I only I could fit my hands around his bulbous neck!

  345. Joey Jo-Jo Jr Shabadoo Says:

    @ Mini Dagger

    Great pick

  346. johnny Says:

    The band Phish.

    Jam bands suck as much as raggae (hell of a pick by whomever took it, by the way). They always seemed like another excuse for Deadheads to get high while eatinng shitty grilled cheese sandwiches.

  347. Billg Says:

    Andy Dick

    Not funny then, not funny now

  348. denvergodfather Says:

    The Grateful Dead and all of the smelly fugly fans that their shitty music spwaned.

  349. hardawayhatesyou Says:

    Message boards and their posters/commentors.

    Not us, mind you (we are cool). There’s a difference between blog commenters and what I’m talking about. I’m talking about the morons on tWWL and imdb, to name a few.

    I dont know if that is a irrational hatred or not……unsure as to how many other people hate them.

  350. cannon fire Says:

    Toby Keith. I can’t stand that hillbilly retard

  351. Smurftastic Says:

    Back to talk show hosts.

    Montel. He’s like the male Oprah… but with a psychic who he thinks is NOT full of shit on every month.

    You = awful, you pretentious ass.

  352. Hakim Drops the Ball Says:

    Damnit, how could I forget Simmons! Will, am I allowed to go after his intern (the second one)? Or do I have to wait 10 picks or something?

  353. Rocco Says:

    Steve Carrell was on my list, mainly because of The Office. Worst. Show. Ever.

  354. Hakim Drops the Ball Says:

    Well, not Will.
    Corrected.

  355. Mike Says:

    Jagerbombs. As a college student, I hear a lot of people raving about them, and it’s really fucking annoying. It’s a shitty liquor…in a shitty mixer! Con-grat-u-fucking-lations, you can drink dog shit! I was fortunate enough to be started on scotch at 14, and though whiskey costs more, it’s completely worth it.

    Oh, and futurems., ignoring Peterson was a crime, but I don’t think the Tupelo/McGraw comparison’s really fair. McGraw, while not the most talented artist, is a country legend. I’m not a huge fan of Tupelo, but they were a good band. Not legendary though, and certainly nowhere near as influential as McGraw.

  356. Ryno Says:

    Al Sharpton.

    I only have so much guilt to give.

  357. Hank Scorpio Says:

    Michael Brown, former head of FEMA.

    What’s that? New Orleans and the Gulf Coast got blown to smithereens by a storm? Nah, we don’t need to do anything. It’ll dry out within a week.

    As someone who did 4 relief trips to rebuild that area since Katrina, I offer you a hearty fuck you.

  358. hardawayhatesyou Says:

    @foozer: While I fully agree with you (I’ve wanted Nancy Grace to develop a painful disease/sickness for some time), I don’t think its an irrational hatred.

    I think anyone with a working brain hates her.

  359. Rocco Says:

    I’m surprised Phish/The Grateful Dead etc. lasted so long. Possibly because so many people really do hate them.

  360. claude balls Says:

    Stephen Colbert. Dude, you make enough money; get that ear fixed.

    How does selecting Nancy Grace entitle one to the win? That may be the most rational hatred named today. She’s a fucking cunt. Everyone hates her. Seriously, name one person you know who actually likes or respects her.

  361. Tech N9ne's Tribute to Falco Says:

    The Love Guru

  362. Kyle Orton's out of work mach3 Says:

    @Tdub Tell me about it, Bad Quarterbacks are the Bears fan’s curse though. Tarvaris Jackson ain’t a whole lot better. I am waiting to see if purple jesus gets hurt again, or when Jared Allen gets suspended for the year for his third substance abuse violation. You guys would be a lot more dangerous given a better quarterback. I have this bad feeling the lowly Lions could pull the division off this year.

  363. Ryno Says:

    That ugly slit Laura Ingram.

    We get it, nobody wants to touch your Pink Taco. Stop being bitter and shoving your born-again values down my throat.

  364. devin hester's speech coach Says:

    @ mini dagger: A-motherfucking-men my friend. I hate that pompous dick.

    Dur, I can draw. Big deal you floppy haired fuck.

  365. The Big Hern Says:

    @sdbruin — good call on reggae. I hate that shit.

    I’m picking David Archuleta. I just want to punch that little douchebag in the face. And fuck all those teenage girls that love him because they’re too stupid to realize that he’s obviously gay.

  366. Rocco Says:

    Jess Jackson. Extort some more companies you racist. Keep segregating yourselves.

  367. TDub Says:

    The management at CNN, Time Warner cable, the people on the view, and others all seemingly love Nancy Grace, otherwise she wouldn’t be getting paid to spew swill on a daily basis.

    I will, however, concede that it is a rational pick, so maybe gets DQ’d. I was just so amazed she fell that far/I didn’t pick her. She should be thrown in jail for her behavior during the Duke rape case.

  368. Tech N9ne's Tribute to Falco Says:

    Poor People

  369. Smurftastic Says:

    OH MY GOD I CAN’T BELIEVE THIS IS STILL ON HERE:

    Perez Hilton

    I know that most people who read this site (aka non-douches) hate him… but sitting in the back of a law school class… at least 70% of the computer screens show his site in each class.

    “OOOH I know how to use Paint and write stuff like a 3 year old. Sometimes I call celebrities fat. Tee hee, I’m such a rebel!”

  370. claude balls Says:

    Please excuse me while I change my screen name to futuremrfuturemrsrickankiel.

    Seriously, you like football and Uncle Tupelo? I just made a mess in my pants.

    The front of my pants.

  371. John John The Bastard Says:

    Dave The Wave – Commenter on NOIS. If you don’t know why you don’t deserve to.

  372. jenny Says:

    i don’t know who they are but these people who clog up the l.i.e. (long island expressway) every friday during the summer to go out to the hamptons and then clog it back up on sunday to go home. where the hell do they all come from? stay the fuck off long island and give me back the road.

  373. Otto Man Says:

    Since Nancy Grace is gone, I’ll complete the pairing with Glenn Beck.

    Look, I’m all for hiring the mentally retarded, but there’s no need to put them in front of the camera.

  374. Lil Lebowski Urban Achievers Says:

    The guy held captive in my basement.

    \won’t put the damn lotion on his skin.

  375. Ryno Says:

    Kirk Cameron

    How can you give up all the fame and glory from Growing Pains to spend time spreading God’s word?

    There are legions of 30 something women out there who would volunteer to be your slam-piece if you’d only let them!

  376. Jefferson Short Bus Says:

    Julia Roberts. I’ve hated her for 20 years, for no good goddamn reason.

  377. TDub Says:

    @ Lebowski,

    Give him the hose, then.

  378. ognihs Says:

    al davis – i’ve never actively cheered for anyone to die, but there will be dancing and drinking when this fucker is buried.

  379. Joey Jo-Jo Jr Shabadoo Says:

    Wanna-be hippies. I am sure everyone here knows one. The dipshits that wore Abercrombie & Fitch in high school who come back after one semester in college and all of a sudden they have fucking dreadlocks and don’t bathe and act like they care about the enviornment and hate “The Man”, even though they still drive that H2 Hummer their parents bought them and they go to Starbucks. Fuck you hippies!!!

  380. POD Says:

    Beyonce. Stupid Cunt.

  381. ognihs Says:

    hippies > wanna-be hippies
    they burn cleaner and faster

    for those of you who can’t tell the difference, the real hippies have black soles when barefoot.

    /santa cruz hippie hatred expert

  382. TDub Says:

    Clint Eastwood.

    His movies are fucking dribble. Seriously, they are so bad I can’t take it.

  383. Tech N9ne's Tribute to Falco Says:

    Pat Sajak. I have a friend with a lake house within a stone’s throw of Sajak’s. Literally. Like all we need are some stones.

  384. Joey Jo-Jo Jr Shabadoo Says:

    I am going to take a stab here and say Otto man isn’t a Republican??

  385. Smurftastic Says:

    Amy Winehouse.

    Right, she’s a crackhead so most people judge her… but what’s with all the obsession over her music? Again, I don’t get what all the fuss is about.

    And the beehive? REALLY? A-it doesn’t look good, and B-pockets are much more practical for hiding drugs, or so I’m told.

  386. Kccal Says:

    Anyone who works at google. I use it, you use it, God uses it, but just because you work there doesn’t mean that you have a badge that says “I get to act like an ass for the rest of my life.” Anyone from the bay knows that Mountain View is a breeding ground for the next generation of douchebags. All we need is Shia or Zach Braff to move there to seal the deal.

  387. Hank Scorpio Says:

    This is local but Fox 29 in Philadelphia correspondent Julie Kim.

    For an Asian gal, her eyes are way too far apart. Looks like a grey alien with a human mask on.

  388. Chris - Bess Mervin Says:

    Shane from the shield, always hated that pussy.

  389. Rocco Says:

    @Jefferson Short Bus…took her early in the draft. Still can’t figure out why everyone loves her, why people go to her movies, or why she makes what $20M per? She’s ugly.

  390. Otto Man Says:

    hippies > wanna-be hippies
    they burn cleaner and faster

    Does the patchouli smell better when they burn? Because as Patton Oswalt put it, regular patchouli already smells like dirt that’s been fucked by a hobo.

  391. Billg Says:

    @ Hank Scorpio

    I draft Gary Pappa. Just read the damn sports script!

  392. Otto Man Says:

    I am going to take a stab here and say Otto man isn’t a Republican??

    So many comments coming to mind here, but I’ll leave it at a civil “no.”

  393. Pemulis Says:

    im super late here because its friday and my boss is out so ive been busy doing nothing ni other peoples offices all day, but CTRL F tells me no one has taken barry bonds yet. yoink! and fuck him in the face.

  394. Tech N9ne's Tribute to Falco Says:

    Dr. 90210

  395. Joey Jo-Jo Jr Shabadoo Says:

    @ Otto

    haha fair enough

  396. futuremrsrickankiel Says:

    Mike, I see your point… I think if you understood how rabidly obsessed with Uncle Tupelo’s music I am, you’d see why I equate their talent with Peterson. McGraw is cool — I listen to him, just like I listen to Benny Goodman — but musically there’s no comparison, say I.

    claude balls, clean yourself up! We’ve got company coming over.

    /tosses you a rag

    Incidentally, I saw Jay Farrar and Son Volt in Boston this past weekend and it was unbe-fucking-lievable. He ended with “Are You Sure Hank Done It This Way” by Waylon Jennings and I almost dropped dead.

  397. sdbruin Says:

    @ Big Hern – thanks for the props, and for mentioning David Archuleta. I’ll go one step further and draft his dad, Papa Joe, Billy Ray Cyrus, and every other overbearing parent who feels they need to manage their kid’s business affairs, even beyond the age of maturity. You are all greedy leeches looking to capitalize on your offspring for financial gain. Go fuck yourselves.

  398. Lil Lebowski Urban Achievers Says:

    Chris Hansen.

    /For depriving so many kids of alcohol and stuffed animals.

  399. Oats Says:

    i’m taking that loud mouth asshat – stephen/steven a. smith. stfu, buddy.

  400. smaaron Says:

    Megan Fox.

    Sure, she’s attractive with clothes on. But stop trotting out your tatoo covered body. You look like recovering addict Josh Hamilton with all that sanscript on your torso.

  401. Cock Flashy Says:

    Cheryl David. Fucking whiny, spoiled, complaining, pampered waspy bitch who only married Larry for the money, never backs him up, always sells him out, and is just generally a shitty wife. Call me crazy, but I’d rather be married to Susie than Cheryl. At least with Susie you know what you’re in for.

  402. Jefferson Short Bus Says:

    @Rocco: My bad. I missed that. Let’s try this instead:

    Terry McMillian. Fuck you, and fuck Waiting to Exhale, with its perpetuation of the stereotype that all Black men are worthless. If anyone deserved to be left by their husband because he was secretly gay, it’s you.

  403. Gut Out Says:

    Harrison Ford – Comb your hair you douche!

  404. Smurftastic Says:

    Conan O’Brien

  405. The Incredible Fulk Says:

    That was a genius pick, Cock Flashy. (A sequence of words I have never expected to say in my lifetime). Even better that she’s not even real, but a character. I hate that bitch.

    I have to choose suped up Long Island shit car owners. You think squealing around in your C3PO-color-spray-painted Saturn Ion with the spoiler twice as high as the car itself means you are cool? Take some of the money you blew on making your car look “cool” and invest it in a decent car. I can at least respect assholes racing fast cars, rather than douchebags making shitty cars look like they should be fast but arent.

  406. dick_gozinia Says:

    The Menards Guy.

    I hate his crooked-ass smile and his creepy hair.

    http://www.menardsguy.com/

  407. Mike Says:

    futurems.: Oh, I fully understand. I feel precisely the same way about Johnny Cash. Insulting him around me is a quick ticket to a stabbing.

    Metallica. Loved by fucking everyone, but so damn annoying. Plus, they completely betrayed their original ethic. I’m not going to demand that artists never do videos or sell products, but if it’s part of your credo that you’re non-commercial, then you turn around and sell yourself like a $3 whore, you should get plenty of shit for it. Add in the fact that I don’t like their music, or see anything particularly special about it, and you have irrational hatred in spades.

  408. kushiro Says:

    Joss Whedon.

    Loved, LOVED Firefly/Serenity (and Buffy was good). But this earnest male-feminist takes himself too goddamn seriously. Plus he’s got the most unreasonably rabid, loyal cult fanbase that laps up every word of his overwrought empowerment blog posts and so-boring-I-want-to-scrape-by-brains-out-of-my-skull-with-a-rusty-spoon DVD commentaries.

    Just. Hate. That. Guy.

  409. Joey Jo-Jo Jr Shabadoo Says:

    Country music. I know it’s not a person but I hate it so much I have to rant about it. I have lived in the South my whole life and I can honestly say I have never once liked this shit. People ask me all the time “why don’t you like country music, you have lived here your whole life and you were born in Tennessee?” I say it’s because it fucking sucks. Just because you live in Oregon am I suppose to assume you are some hippie dispshit?? Oh and another thing why do so many people from the North like this shit?? That baffles my mind. Also fuck NASCAR. I had to get that off my chest.

  410. porky1 Says:

    Stella Artois.

    The official beer of douchebags who pretend to like good beer.

  411. Hank Scorpio Says:

    Mimes.

    Doesn’t matter if they’re doing that “trapped in a box” or “walking against the wind” shit, I just want to set them on fire when I see them.

  412. Chris - Bess Mervin Says:

    Allison Krause and Robert Plant – I like both of them separately but Christ together they sound like nails on a chalkboard to me.

  413. Rocco Says:

    @Joey: We like it because it’s good-old American music. None of that rap shit you kids listen to. Which reminds me…

    Rap music. Fuck rap and fuck hip-hop. No talent assholes.

  414. futuremrsrickankiel Says:

    Haha Joey JJ Jr. S… we would NOT get along, dear. I’m a born-and-raised Boston gal with an inexplicable love of both [good] country music AND stock-car racing.

  415. crazy joe davola Says:

    Don’t think I have seen him yet… Rudy Guiliani. Fuck him and his exploitation of the worst day in my life. Put your command center in the middle of the biggest terrorist target. Veto spending so fireman can have up to date radio equipment. Pay cops so little that the average guy leaves in 3 years. If hate were people, I would be China.

  416. jujrok Says:

    the rolling fucking stones. you fuckers have been embalmed for going on 40 years now. just disappear and live off royalties like normal people, you addled yapcunts.

    people who work in the media and don’t know it’s a plural noun, which leads them to locutions like: the mainstream media is unanimous in its praise for senator obama. you illiterate photogenic fucks, may you be defaced in a car wreck.

  417. Stev D Says:

    that asshole from diners, drive-ins and dives. Him and his stupid wristband can fry in kitchen of some incredibly quirky restaurant outside of charleston sc.

  418. Cock Flashy Says:

    Every single Black person who ever told another Black person that studying, doing well in school, speaking proper English, and success and achievement was not keeping it real. You, not insufficient affirmative action programs, are personally responsible for delaying racial equality by another generation. Fuck yourselves.

  419. porky1 Says:

    @rocco: I guarantee joey was referring to the Garth Brooks/Shania Twain era and everything that followed, when Country”Music” went from guys like Waylon and Willie to unimaginative cocks and cunts who were nothing more than Bon Jovi/Lita Ford with fiddles and cowboy hats.

    Most modern country hits are built around a chorus hook taken from bumper stickers found in a random Wal-Mart parking lot.

  420. Smurftastic Says:

    Chris Paul.

    FUCK. OFF.

  421. Naptown Drew Says:

    Value Pick: Justin Long (the Apple guy)

    Somehow manages enough douche to make the PC guy look cooler than him.

  422. jenny Says:

    @ the incredible fulk

    but how else will those tokyo-drifting douchebags make their saturday night bar runs if not for racing light to light on rt 25 showing off their neon ground effects and slut-whore girlfriends?

  423. Joey Jo-Jo Jr Shabadoo Says:

    @ Rocco I hate rap with a passion as well…I don’t really classify rap as music.

    @ Future- haha sure we would, I have a lot of friends who love country music but I have learned to go to my “happy place” when either that or NASCAR are on TV, radio, etc. It’s the only reason I am not locked up in jail.

  424. Joey Jo-Jo Jr Shabadoo Says:

    @ porky1

    exactly…the new shit is what I meant.

  425. Grimey Says:

    The song “Sweet Home Alabama.” I was born in Alabama, and I HATE this song. Mostly because almost every person who sings along with that song is not from Alabama. Posers.

  426. porky1 Says:

    @ Naptown:

    Troo dat. Does ANYONE have sympathy for the Mac side? The PC dork is just so much more likable. “I’m a snotty Gen-Y tool.” “And I’m a PC.” What marketing genius would want “PC” to seem like the BUMBLING UNDERDOG in a comparison? That’s how we got 8 years of Bush for chrissakes!

  427. Rocco Says:

    FutureMrs you’re getting the boys all riled up…country and NASCAR? How does this all fit with your mixed-drink selections?

  428. Rocco Says:

    @porky & Joey: You must be referring then to Rascal Flatts, etc. Sometimes I can’t tell if I’m listening to the country stations or the Top-40 station.

  429. Gut Out Says:

    Is it irrational to hate everyone from Nebraska?

    Pick up the fucking pace!

  430. porky1 Says:

    Rascall Flatts…exactly. Winger with cowboy hats. Fucking lame.

  431. Rocco Says:

    Thursday in the Square. A local Buffalo thing. Used to be cool. Huge outdoor free concert with beer tents. Then it got popular and every asshole started coming and it’s a total cluster F.

  432. Westbrook Is My Anti-Drug Says:

    Jesus Tittyfucking Christ, you need to do these on days when I’m in my office at my computer all day!

    Anyway, my first pick is Giada DeLaurentiis. Stupid bitch thinks she can flash her titties and make up for her Skeletor-like mouth and annoying personality? A pox, I says!

  433. Klak Says:

    Oh goddammit. I read every one of these posts only to be denied my pick at the last minute. The PC vs. Mac commercials are fucking horrible.

    That said, I’ll draft Mac users as a whole. Macs are computers for retards who don’t know how to use computers. If you want to be unique, try Unix. Otherwise, stfu, nobody cares.

  434. Voice of Unreason Says:

    It says in the post “those people you hate deeply and irrationally”. I took that to mean people, not “PTI” or “rap music”. Gee, that’s so irrational since everyone likes rap music. Huh?

    This draft is all over the place, but there are some good ones for sure.

  435. sdbruin Says:

    Switzerland. Pick a freakin’ side already.

  436. Rocco Says:

    Tatoos. Great. You have a tatoo. Or multiple tatoos. Yes, they look cool. Does that make you cooler than me? Go fuck yourself.

  437. porky1 Says:

    Charles Bukowski.

    I have a friend who thinks CB’s the greatest writer ever, you need to read this, read this, read this…

    I don’t need to read this. Let me sum it up.

    “Chinaski” gets a job.
    “Chinaski” gets drunk.
    “Chinaski” pisses off his boss.
    “Chinaski” gets drunk.
    “Chinaski” fucks an ugly broad.
    “Chinaski” gets drunk.
    “Chinaski” gets fired.
    “Chinaski” gets drunk.
    “Chinaski” gets dumped.
    “Chinaski” gets drunk.

    The End.

  438. futuremrsrickankiel Says:

    Ha! Not sure what to tell you, Rocco. I’m a complex gal, I suppose.

  439. alx Says:

    Radiohead. Mostly because of people who claim that “You’ll like them if you just give them a chance! I mean… they single handedly changed music!” Fuck you and fuck your band.

  440. cannon fire Says:

    Value pick: Jeremy Shockey

  441. Rocco Says:

    Edit: people with tatoos. Or people who make/produce/listen to rap music. Sorry Voice of Unreason.

  442. Pemulis Says:

    no ones chosen the nyc homeless yet? mine!

  443. dick_gozinia Says:

    Anybody with an abortion-related sticker on their car.

    Pro-lifers & pro-choicers both suck my dick. You’ve taken a single campaign issue and turned it into the thing that decides who you vote for every election. Education? Economy? Foreign Relations? Individual Rights? Who the fuck cares about those issues? I just care about abortion.

    If abortion is your #1 issue no matter your side, you’re a fucking moron. Thanks for telling me this while I’m stuck in traffic.

  444. pimp named slickback Says:

    neil young. if Dana Carvey can replicate you EXACTLY in both singing and playing the guitar, you fucking suck at your job. And don’t tell a southern man how to live his life you fucking Canadian.

  445. porky1 Says:

    High fives to alx.

  446. Westbrook Is My Anti-Drug Says:

    Next pick… Heroes. I’ve never watched the show, thus making my hate for it irrational. I just hate that they’re trying to imitate the ZOMG mysterious ensemble cast show from LOST so hard and the whole superhero thing at the same time. Plus, I hate how every other fucking week they have a new catchphrase for the show. Fuck ‘em. And fuck Hayden Panetierre (literally and figuratively… I’d do her so hard, but GOD DAMN she’s too fucking perky)

  447. Lil Lebowski Urban Achievers Says:

    Whoever pretends to be a guardian of Wikipedia entries. Congrats on your self-named custody of Barbaro’s page. You will surely find happiness on the other side of the Rainbow Bridge.

    \affirmed

  448. Mike Says:

    @porky: I don’t think anyone has sympathy for the Mac guy, but they pity the PC guy. The Apple marketers are making him a pitiful object; it’s hard to associate with that. Hodgman makes him likeable, but he can’t keep him from being pitiful, and no one wants to be associated with pitiful.

    @Klak: Yeah yeah yeah, and PCs are computers for people who really like reboots and viruses. Jesus, get over the inferiority complex. Using computer choice to stereotype people is fucking retarded.

    Irrational hatred: People who define themselves or others by brand names. Hollister/Playstation/Nike are not fucking personality traits.

  449. Pemulis Says:

    anyone with vanity license plates. best one i ever saw was “RC BOATER” some one is that enthusiastic about remote controlled boating ?

  450. Joey Jo-Jo Jr Shabadoo Says:

    @Rocco

    Correct.

    What also drives me crazy is when SOME of these Northerners move down to the South and get a hard on for country music and enjoy the beaches and what not yet continue to talk shit about how much better the North is…well if it’s so great go back home asshole. I don’t want to have to hear all the time how great Jersey is, aka the armpit of America.

  451. claude balls Says:

    Gisele Bündchen.

    Fuck Tom Brady, but not me? Fuck you.

  452. Jefferson Short Bus Says:

    Women who do oral and anal and still call themselves virgins. Yup, you’ve saved your “virtue” for your true love, whom you’re going to marry someday. Hope he likes the fact that you shit pancakes.

  453. Joey Jo-Jo Jr Shabadoo Says:

    Haha Truer words have never been spoken short bus

  454. Otto Man Says:

    I have to admire how quickly this turned into a national episode of “You Know What Really Grinds My Gears?”

  455. Librarian Says:

    New Bands, I get it you’re misunderstood. I got it the first time around with Nirvana and Pearl Jam. Shut up play your songs and get off the stage.

  456. Hollywood Says:

    The hits just keep on coming. I nominate Lil Wayne for releasing that fucking “Lollipop” song. Speaking of hip-hop, what the hell has music come to when bullshit like this song and that fucking Soulja Boy song are able to dominate radio play?

    Fuck you Lil Wayne. Fuck Soulja Boy for that matter too…you fucking douchebag. Guy drives around in his parents’ Nissan Sentra but he’s a gangster? Yeah, right.

  457. smurphette Says:

    @chris-bess mervin: Haha your anticipation of my reaction is endearing, but I don’t really mind because I’m kind of over The Office and I’m not the fly-off-the-handle type of girl. And ew, she’s definitely not Mexican.

    @alx: Oh my god, WORD. I fucking hate Radiohead.

    Jonathan Rhys-Meyers. HE IS NOT HOT. Yes, I watch The Tudors, but my loathing of him is perfect for him to play Henry. He was the only thing I didn’t like about Bend It Like Beckham – THERE IS NO WAY TWO CHICKS WOULD FIGHT OVER HIM. GUHHHH.

  458. TDub Says:

    Mike kinda touched on this, but what really grinds my gears is people who think that they are expressive and creative BECAUSE they use apple rather than PC.

  459. claude balls Says:

    Jefferson Short Bus wins because that is the most irrational thing I have read today. If my wife could shit pancakes, especially if they came with butter and syrup included, I would treat her like a queen.

  460. futuremrsrickankiel Says:

    Yay my partner in hate returns!

    …and while you’re here, my dear, I’m drafting Peyton Manning. Kiss my value pick, bitches. This dipshit fetus-faced corporate shill makes me gag.

  461. Westbrook Is My Anti-Drug Says:

    Wendy’s. You’re not better than fast food. YOU ARE FAST FOOD, just more fucking expensive.

  462. John John The Bastard Says:

    Nate Dolan – The NBA creates a rule so we can get rid of Allan Houston’s giant contract with literally no repurcussion, and what does he do. He uses it to cut Jerome “JYD” Williams.

  463. John John The Bastard Says:

    Actually make that James Dolan, I think Nate Dolan was a kid I played baseball with in High School but whatever, fuck that kid too.

  464. Chris - Bess Mervin Says:

    @Smurphette – Hey I just didn’t want to offended anyone with boobs. Even if the are a colts fan.

    Anyways Baltimore can also suck it.

  465. Grimey Says:

    King of the Hill. That show blows.

    Oh wait, I just rationalized that hate.

  466. devin hester's speech coach Says:

    Taco Bell commercials. All of them. They fucking suck, especially the one where the chick has a bacon chalupa in a handbag.

  467. AndreReedRichards Says:

    Bob Dylan.

    Speak English, bitch!

  468. Kyle Orton's out of work mach3 Says:

    Girls with fat asses that wear thongs and hip hugging pants so i have to see the whale tail when they are sitting down, if you want to wear it cool but seriously I don’t want to see it.

  469. Rocco Says:

    @Otto: guilty as charged. I’m sure you saw this coming though…I’m running out of individual people who most people like but I hate for no good reason. Not a very deep draft.

  470. Cock Flashy Says:

    Um, Stu Scott anyone? Or was it too obvious? We’re like 400 picks in here, I figured he’d be in the top 10. I knew what shuckin’ and jivin’ was, but I never actually SAW it until he got on the air.

  471. Upstate Underdog Says:

    Jennifer Lopez

    someone please explain to me what her talent is?

  472. porky1 Says:

    So my 12 picks (13 minus 1 DQ) are done, I think I’ve got as good a roster as anyone this draft.

    Sara Jessica Parker (solid #1 pick)
    Kevin Garnett (a natural, if you think about it enough)
    Tyler Perry (sleeper)
    Michael Jordan (a round 4 shocker!)
    Brett Ratner (DQ’d-picked too soon)
    Ringo Starr (it’s Ringo)
    Jessica Alba (How can stupidity detract from a bimbo? She found a way.)
    Bugs Bunny (I hate that durn rabbit)
    Ashton Kutcher (Surprising he fell so low)
    Seth Green (ditto)
    Justin Timberlake (late round steal of the draft)
    Stella Artois (project pick)
    Charles Bukowski (Mr. Irrelevant)

    See y’all in the Hater Playoffs! Hate, hate, hate!

  473. GeneralKrull Says:

    Jack Kirby.

    All your drawings look like fucking squares with arms and feet.

  474. dick_gozinia Says:

    Department stores that put Christmas decorations out before Halloween.

    This has zero negative repercussions on my life, but it irritates the shit out of me. I get mad to the point where if I’m walking around Target in mid-October and I see wreaths, I yell things at the inanimate Christmas merchandise.

    /has problems

  475. Lil Lebowski Urban Achievers Says:

    Every one of those home deocrator and staging show experts. Look, I’m not looking to be entertained. I’m looking for good ideas and making drapes out of newspapers is not a good idea. Give the people some real help and leave your eccentricities to a minimum.

    “Oooh I can put a sheet over a old sofa and make it look new?” No fucking way!!!

  476. TDub Says:

    NPR’s Neil Cohnen(sp?)

    I imagine him being an incredibly pretentious asshole that loves winetasting and plays.

  477. John John The Bastard Says:

    Annnnnnnnnd I will go with Seth McFarland. I will admit, I have chuckled at some Family Guy and find American Dad pretty good, but no joke, fuck that dude and his love for musical theater. I have never seen a smugger dick in my life.

  478. johnny Says:

    People who tell me how great British comedy is and then condescend to me that I just “don’t understand it” and “if they could explain it to me” I would like it.

    Monty Python blows and the original British Office is about as funny as watching puppies be put to sleep.

  479. Pemulis Says:

    have you ever thought maybe you just don’t understand it? I’m sure someone would explain it to you… if they could.

  480. Upstate Underdog Says:

    I swear 472 must be a record for the Friday fantasy draft here at KSK.

  481. Jefferson Short Bus Says:

    I believe Josh Groban is still on the board.

    I keep stubble on my face for an extra couple of days to neutralize the metrosexual influence of people like that whiny sumbitch.

  482. Rocco Says:

    @UU: she falls into the inexplicably popular women with huge asses group alongside Kim Kardashian. Or else she’s Jenny from the block, and who doesn’t like the girl next door?

    Huge pick of the day: Elisha Cuthbert. Hot as hell, could care less if she’s a good actress or not, but dated that cock knocker Sean Avery? Cheers to the MYFO gang for thorough Avery-bashing this season.

  483. smurphette Says:

    @futuremrs: At the risk of not giving you the reaction you were hoping for, I’m not a particularly huge Peyton fan myself. I mean, I’m glad he’s our QB and all, but he’s a total douche. Partners in hate, indeed. I love the taste of haterade in the morning….and every other time of day.

    Next selection: Candace Bushnell, for writing the book that spawned Sex and the City. And really, “chick lit” in general. Fuck you, “beach read.” Go to hell spunky, whiny, contrived “heroines.” Jane Austen is rolling in her grave.

  484. Jefferson Short Bus Says:

    Smurphette wins.

  485. Way worse than Vitale Says:

    Billy Packer. What a douchebag

  486. porky1 Says:

    Not a pick…my draft is done.

    That said, I’m very surprised Miley Cyrus is still in the green room.

  487. TDub Says:

    Well, I think that oughtta cover it. Nice work everyone, I think we all feel better.

  488. Rocco Says:

    Was Miley Cyrus the “fan” that ran onstage during Toby Keith’s CMT Music Awards performace? Or was that a real fan who was really escorted off stage? I really couldn’t tell, but if that was her, I have a bit of sympathy for Billy Ray, what with the producers of the show parading his 15 year-old daughter out there to dance like a stripper.

  489. Voice of Unreason Says:

    Arcade Fire.

    Every hipster and music critic loves them, but I just can’t stand them. They’ve singlehandedly ruined the whole “indie rock” genre, because now every band getting a contract is a whiny-ass Vampire Weekend or Panda Bear or Yeasayer or whatever Pitchforkmedia.com is beating off about this month.

  490. The Pirate Sloth Says:

    The Haterade in these comments are astounding. I hate all of you for it.

  491. John John The Bastard Says:

    I pick rocco, because he called my favorite athlete a cock-knocker.

  492. Gino Tourettsa Says:

    I’m coming into this draft almost 500 picks late on a Friday afternoon and I’ve read some really good shit here but my first pick still hasn’t been taken.

    MY SELECTION: The people of Wisconsin. Fuck those obese, Miller-and-brandy-swilling, cheese-and-bacon-grease-injecting Neanderthals. Fuck the Packers, fuck Brett Favre (already selected), fuck Reggie White, fuck Bart Starr, fuck Paul Hornung, fuck Tony Mandarich, fuck Sterling Sharpe, fuck Lynn Dickey…

  493. nashville steeler fan Says:

    manbearpig…half man, half bear and half pig..and i hate me all of some man-bear-pig

  494. John John The Bastard Says:

    In all seriousness I would like to pick Sherriff Joe Arpaio, Sherrif of Maricopa County, AZ. How this dude isn’t more nationally reviled is beyond me. He started Tent City, an experimental prison facility in burlap tents in the FUCKING DESERT OF ARIZONA. Then, he makes them wear striped canvas jumpsuits and dies their undies pink? FUCK THAT!

  495. dick_gozinia Says:

    Sergio Garcia

    I can’t think of a single thing he’s ever done to piss me off, but I still hate his fucking guts. I just don’t like his stupid face. I get unnaturally excited when I see him miss shots or lose and I couldn’t care less about golf.

  496. ognihs Says:

    tom jackson – for encouraging chris berman for all these years.

  497. TDub Says:

    Congrats

  498. TDub Says:

    KSK

  499. TDub Says:

    That’s

  500. TDub Says:

    500

  501. Otto Man Says:

    Cockblocked!

  502. TDub Says:

    Posts

  503. TDub Says:

    AAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

  504. TDub Says:

    We will meet again, Otto.

  505. Rocco Says:

    JJTB: WTF? I didn’t declare myself eligible for the draft. I don’t know if we’d get along all that well anyway, seeing that after first reading about Sherriff Arpaio, I was thoroughly impressed with his tactics.

  506. futuremrsrickankiel Says:

    Rocco reads my blog so he is exempt from haterade.

  507. Gino Tourettsa Says:

    Otto Man,
    Well played, Old Sport. I’ve been enjoying your work, but since I’ve just learned TDub is a fellow Vikings fan, I want you to know this: you shall rue the day, sir.

    Also, the Chiefs cheated in the 1970 Super Bowl and Hank Stram trained child soldiers in Liberia and Sierra Leone.

  508. SonOfSpam Says:

    Terri Schiavo. Ok, we get it. You’re lazy and don’t wanna work. Why should I care???

    Also, what would it take for Smurphette and FutureMrs to hook up? Can I help facilitate this in any way?

    (Wilco > Uncle Tupelo)

  509. Naptown Drew Says:

    What would it take for Smurphette and FutureMrs to hook up?

    At least a guarantee that they would never feel creeped out about being the only two regular female commenters on the site. And it might help if they were actually lesbians.

  510. SonOfSpam Says:

    Never creeped out? C’mon…they already know about my blood-stained clown suit I wear while commenting.

    Oh right…I forgot they can’t see me…

  511. Zack Says:

    Cumulus clouds. Those wonderful puffy, cottony clouds that usually accompany fine weather, but every time one of those fuckers passes in front of the sun, it gets windy and chilly and pisses me off. Fuck cumulus clouds.

  512. John John The Bastard Says:

    @ Future Mrs.: So do I, as a matter of fact the Avery post on there is what reminded me of it.

  513. Dan From Chicago Says:

    OK over 500 picks in & I will draft Eli Manning – just because either he was not drafted or he was and I’m to lazy to read every post.

  514. Gino Tourettsa Says:

    For my next selection, I choose actor John Corbett. He played the same bullshit rugged-yet-sensitive douche bag character in in drivel like “Northern Exposure”, “Sex and the City” and “My Big, Fat Greek Wedding”. Now he’s doing voice-overs for Applebee’s and uses words like “killer app’s” to describe nachos and onion blossoms.

    I’ve always smelled a rat when it comes to that guy. I have an irrational hatred for this mincing applejohn and wish him a painful and ironic death. Any ideas, anyone?

  515. Self-Actualized Sex Kitten Says:

    Kirsten Dunst. Squinty eyes. Makes me nervous.

  516. snappr Says:

    Soda fillers who take 5 minutes for the foam to settle and don’t move their ass out of the way. People who turn out into a turn and squeeze your lane like they are driving a freaking F-350 instead of a Prizm. Repetitive use of the term “y’all”. While drinking their 10 minute soda and turning into my lane. DIE!

  517. Zack Says:

    It’s a steal to get him this late, but I’ll take Chris Kattan. All he’s trying to do is make me laugh, and it’s perfectly rational to be annoyed by him and dislike him, but the hatred I feel for this little fucker goes far, far beyond that.

  518. mini dagger Says:

    people who believe in ghosts. they are not real, but your down syndrome is.

  519. El Duderino Says:

    late to the game here, but Hilary Swank is my clear-cut number one, apparently i’m the only person on the planet who thinks she’s a terrible actress AND that she has a horse-face…if she could only have had a child with barbaro, we would’ve finally seen the unification of the best actor oscar and triple crown titles.

  520. Otto Man Says:

    Gino and TDub:

    I look forward to reviving the rivalry of Super Bowl IV. Drew and I are already wallowing in the mire, and I’m sure he’d appreciate some help, seeing how the Vikings were the suckiest bunch of sucks who ever sucked in that game.

  521. TDub Says:

    @ Gino,

    thanks for putting Otto on notice. That is one palindrome that will get what’s coming to him… you know… electronically.

  522. TDub Says:

    Drew,

    Jared Allen and his entourage of Hennepin county sherriff’s deputies will put us back on top. And you will be the ones who are the ball-lickers!!!

  523. TDub Says:

    Not Drew, I meant Otto…

    //gracefully exits.

  524. Gino Tourettsa Says:

    @TDub

    We’ll get this commenter board up to nearly 600 posts and then do something to settle Otto Man’s hash. We’ll give him the old Ragnarök Surprise, if you know what I mean.

    Also, Lamar Hunt made his fortune selling bogus Malk (with Vitamin R) to school children.

  525. Zack Says:

    Duderino, Hillary Swank went ages ago (would have been a good solid irrational pick otherwise). My #3 pick will be all Israelis. I’m not talking about Jews, I’m talking about people who are from the country of Israel. I used to work in the backpacking industry, and it seemed like every story that came down the grapevine about someone’s stash getting stolen or someone ducking out without paying their bill had to do with Israelis. Hopefully for the purposes of this draft “prejudicial” is equal to “irrational”.

  526. TDub Says:

    Well, for my thing de resistance, I choose “Otto Man” with my last selection, and I call it a day.

  527. dick_gozinia Says:

    @ Zack – What the fuck is “the backpacking industry”?

  528. Gino Tourettsa Says:

    SAVE BIG MONEY AT MENARDS!

  529. futuremrsrickankiel Says:

    John John TB, I realized that as soon as I posted! I just feel the need to shout people out :) and you know I share in your love of Sean Avery, so there you go.

    Since this thread is pretty much dead, I’ma go ahead and whisper and teeny “Go Celtics!” on it. Woo!

  530. futuremrsrickankiel Says:

    Whoa. Fuck. A smiley. I had no idea that would pop up. Cool!

  531. Francois Leroux Speedskater Says:

    @futuremrs

    Thread isn’t dead, but since the Celts can beat Kobe and Detroit can’t, I’ll say go Celts too.

  532. fangirls on helium Says:

    Carrie Underwood.

    I’m STILL pissed that she won American Idol three years ago.

  533. J.L. White Says:

    I didn’t feel like reading through 531 comments (yet) but I Ctrl + F and didn’t see see his name, so I’ll assume he’s available:

    John Elway

    The only player I ever openly rooted to get a career-threatening injury on the field (Unlike Leonard Little, who I hope gets run over by a family member of someone who was killed by a drunk driver).

  534. indywill Says:

    Natalie Maines of the Dixie Chicks.

    I have no idea why, but I just want to thwack her in the head with a crowbar.

    The thread lives!

  535. dick_gozinia Says:

    @ jl white – I’m with you 100%, but I have a reason for hating Elway. I grew up across the street from a total white trash piece of garbage kid named Ricky Hunt who looked exactly like John Elway but 15 yrs younger. So every time I would see Elway, I’d think of that punk ass Ricky Hunt and then everything would go white. So yeah…kudos on the Elway pick.

  536. Francois Leroux Speedskater Says:

    Manu Ginobili

    He plays hoops the way I did, what with the reckless abandon and high energy (plus lots more talent) but fuck do I hate it when that son of a bitch flops like he got shot with a fucking bazooka.

  537. Ryno Says:

    The entire city of Sacramento. Fucking be something already!

    LA has all the coke and hollywood
    San Diego has the hot jail bait ass and mexicans
    San Fransisco has the incredible views and queers

    WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU BRING TO THE TABLE????111

  538. Matty L-Train Says:

    Linkin Park. You’re a fucking boy band that was put together by your manager, just admit to it. Hell, so were the Sex Pistols, and 50+ year old Johnny Rotten & Steve Jones would still kick your asses, both literally and figuatively. Plus Chester Bennington (total yuppie fratboy name) sounds like Geddy Lee’s whiny effeminate kid brother, without the benefit of having real musicians behind him.

    And while I’m at it, fuck their fans who think they’re so goddamn hardcore when they’re about as dangerous as Clay Aiken.

  539. 12 Pack Abs Says:

    Kenny G. Godammit. I hate this pathetic, mousey-haired, limp-wristed, ass spelunker. If I were to ever cross paths, I would stab him in the fucking adams apple with a tuning fork.

  540. 12 Pack Abs Says:

    And another couple. Fellow Vikings fan here but I can’t help hating on the Zygi Wilf and the Brad Childress. I’ll give you this year fuckers! and if you screw it up, there’s a meat tenderizer and band saw in both of your immediate futures. God, I miss Bud Grant

  541. Westbrook Is My Anti-Drug Says:

    Evgeni Malkin, the cherrypicking, slue-footing, injury-faking, cheap-shotting Russian motherfucker that I hate more than any other hockey player in history (although he’s no high-fiving motherfucker if you ask me)

  542. smurphette Says:

    @Naptown Drew: You are a treat (and completely correct). Most of the Indy guys around here are lovely, I am pleased to say.

    @SonofSpam: While we are very good friends, that’s just not how we roll. I mean, she’s a Pats fan. I could never hook up with a Pats fan who was a dude, let alone a girl. I’m sure she feels the same way about Colts fans.

  543. Gino Tourettsa Says:

    @12 Pack Abs,
    It’s good to see another long-suffering Vikings fan here. It’s even better to see one who dreams of a world without Kenny “No Talent Assclown” G. I’m not yet sure about Zygi Wilf and Tobias Fünke Childress, but I’ll take them over Red McCombs and Mike Tice.

  544. L Says:

    Couldn’t find him, so: JJ Abrams. Trying to ruin Lost. Ruined Mission Impossible 3. I am never going to watch Cloverfield because I hate this smarmy fuck so much and all the debate over “OMG the ending was terrible!” “OMG no it wasn’t!” is pissing me off. I refuse to give him any more attention by watching that movie and forming an opinion about it.

    …and here I am calling attention to him.

  545. Gino Tourettsa Says:

    Here’s my next irrational hatred selection: the British Monarchy.

  546. Westbrook Is My Anti-Drug Says:

    Steal of the draft right here:

    The State of New Jersey

  547. Gino Tourettsa Says:

    I withdraw my last pick. Hating the British Monarchy is completely rational. USA!

  548. muchsarcasm Says:

    Steal of the draft: The Pope. You’ve got people who aren’t even catholic kneeling down and kissing his ring. What self-respecting person does that? And everybody fucking loves him, as shown by his recent US trip. Everybody ignores the fact that when he was a cardinal he sent a note to every bishop threatening penalties including excommunication to anyone who reported child abuse to local authorities.

    I don’t care if that makes my choice rational.

  549. Gino Tourettsa Says:

    I select the English. I have an irrational hatred for the people of England. The Scots, Irish, Welsh and Manx are all cool with me, but fuck John Bull and the Limeys.

  550. Sherrif Gonna Getcha Says:

    Stephen A. Smith

    or maybe that’s

  551. Sherrif Gonna Getcha Says:

    STEPHEN A SMITH!!!!!!!!!!

  552. WhatzIt2U Says:

    Mrs John McCain

  553. Johnny Spoons Says:

    I irrationally hate a lot of sports teams: the Spurs, Lakers, Yankees, Patriots, but (being Canadian) the one I hate the most is the goddamn Toronto Maple Leafs!
    Every f-ing year I have to deal with their asshole, zealot fans (who pick fights with anyone who DARES support another team). Then when the playoffs come around (which their shit team consistantly fails to make) every asshat in a blue and white jersey pretends like the season’s over! “Playoffs? What’s that?”
    WTF?
    Actually, after having read that I realize that’s a perfectly rational hatred.
    How about the entire city of Toronto? Go fuck yourself Toronto.

  554. Zack Says:

    @dick_gozinia – Backpackers lodges are basically youth hostels, except smaller and more “intimate.” Great fun for a limited period of time (~1 year) because you are living in places where gap year women are visiting while they’re on vacation. The downside is that it’s like throwing a house party in your own home every single night.

  555. Biff Says:

    Marlon Perkins. Always sticking Jim with the dirty work. Bastard.

  556. Juice Springsteen Says:

    with my mildly drunk last pick: The sticky thing on the side of newly-purchased CD cases. They have no reason for existing other than to be impossible to peel off. This is why I roll with iTunes store now. Say “good-bye” to you sticky-things and your dying medium!

    /passive-aggressive parallelism

  557. 12-Pack-Abs Says:

    &Gino Tourettsa – Good point about McCombs, but I was in Green Bay last year during the game that shall remain nameless so the hatred is still simmering.
    NEXT POINT OF HATRED – Tony LaRussa. Apart from the hilarious COPS episode, I hate this douchebag Cardinal, wearing my sunglasses-at-night, trying-to-be-hip-so-I-can-hookup-with-bloated-Midwestern-sausage-swallowing-debutants-has-been so badly that I, well apparently am over hyphenating. Is that a word?
    Damn that deamon alcohol

  558. Man Bear Pig Says:

    @Stankonia:
    I hear you on the H-dog hatred. Even before Obama stepped into the spotlight, I always hated this bitch for no reason. Now I have plenty … but I admit to having no real reasons at first.

    I’d like to nominate The White Stripes. They’re pretty talented instrumentally, they have legions of fans, their music is catchy while still having some originality…

    But Jack White’s voice sounds like nails on a fucking chalkboard. Fuck him. I hate him, his face, his music, and everyone he associates with.

    I’ll also add to this list the movie “Fight Club.” I am almost definitely the only 15-29 year old in America to hate this fucking movie. And I do … so, so much. And I can’t intelligently explain why. I just hate it.

  559. dinosaur Says:

    I can’t believe I missed the entire draft, and most of my picks are still on the board, so I’m going to pick them all now.

    1) Sean Combs. Just pick a name and stick with it, you talentless douchebag.

    2) Jimmy Kimmel. You’re not funny, and you have 1/10th of Adam Carolla’s talent, and yet you’re the one that got the late night talk show. And you’re banging Sarah Silverman. I can’t believe the devil paid you that much for your worthless soul.

    3) Jennifer Love Hewitt. It’s not that you refuse to show us your rack, it’s that your ego is so huge that you think you’re too GOOD to allow us to see your rack.

    4) Jessica Alba. I know that she’s already been picked, but I’m picking her for the same reason as my pick #3.

    And with my final pick…..

    5) Everyone who voted for Hillary Clinton…..but ESPECIALLY everyone who voted for her because “I ain’t votin’ for no Mooslim.” Everyone who sincerely believes that Barack Obama is a Muslim should be involuntarily spayed or neutered. If they already have offspring, then those offspring should also be spayed or neutered. It’s time to clean up the gene pool, people.

  560. L Says:

    @Johnny Spoons

    Amen, brother.

  561. Conan Says:

    Def f–ing leppard…… somehow i hear you made a new album and to top of that pile of sht you add tim mcgraw to it…..and why has no one mentioned indaina jones and the kingdom of crystal crap…all of them ford, lucas, spielberg shoudl burn for that waste

  562. dickey simpkins Says:

    Kevin Garnett. You are a poor man’s Tim Duncan, yet judging from your attitude it would seem like you are an awesome player. Oh wait, you’re a pussy who is afraid to take big shots when your team has a chance to win the Finals. Drive to the hoop? Naw, that’s not the RAWR I’M INTENSE way of KG, much more RAWR to pass it to Rondo who doesn’t have a prayer of knocking down a jumpshot. MVP candidate my ass.

    2nd, anyone who watches VH1 or E!. You’re either a wannabe celebrity blogger or a slut trying to get on a reality show, either way you suck at life.

  563. dickey simpkins Says:

    Jay Mariotti, those Mac/PC commercials and Blackberries.

  564. Ryan Beariot Says:

    sorry to piss off the mrs, but i gotta hate on rick ankiel. yes, good for him, he came back from being a pitcher to be an outfielder. yay. that doesnt give you the right to pretend its ok to take HGH, fucker.

    also, tony la russa can fucking die. in fact, fuck the entire city of saint louis. dusty baker too, but thats a justified hate.

    i’d add wisconsin, but its been picked already. and yes, im an irrational chicago fan. i stand by my statements.

  565. mini dagger Says:

    john cusack

  566. Librarian Says:

    Mike Myers

  567. Chico El Camino Says:

    Jeremy Shockey, Michael Strahan, and Eli Manning.

    And I’m a die hard Giants fan. I just can’t stand all of those motherfuckers.

    Shockey is a white version of TO, and suddenly he’s the most popular guy in New York. Fuck you for making us seem like Pats fans. Go to your fucking ring ceremony, you overrated cunt.

    Strahan, I love you. But make up your fucking mind, you bitch.

    Eli Manning talks like he has Down Syndrome. How the fuck did Corky lead us to the Promised Land? It’s just embarrassing having a leader who talks like a moron. Eli Manning is the George W. Bush of Quarterbacks.

  568. lowguppy Says:

    Descartes

    Fuck him and his simple location. Melting wax doesn’t tell you shit about existence, it changed from a solid to a liquid dipshit. Get out of your medieval study and meet some people. Learn about human relations. AND STOP TRYING TO SEPARATE YOUR MIND FROM YOUR BODY!

  569. Jack Brickhouse Says:

    I second the vote for Carie Underwood. I wish Jesus would take the wheel and beat her over the head with it.

  570. jenny Says:

    joe theismann – i’ve got some deep seeded ire towards the man that i can’t explain, but in this case i’m referring strictly to his stint as a commentator. the guy couldn’t ooze more bitterness as he announced the giants games.

    also along the lines of sports announcers:

    ralph kiner – professional career aside, these days when he steps into the booth as a guest announcer it’s a big huh, what did he say? put on our tuxedos? i want some taquitos!

  571. LanceOceanside Says:

    Parking checkers…..in every city…and their loved ones.

  572. Darron Says:

    Tedy Bruschi.
    I saw this fuckwad have a screaming fit into the camera (instead of answering the reporter’s question) at halftime of a playoff game about 5 years ago and have rooted for his early demise ever since.
    Then the fucker went and had a stroke. At first I felt like I should feel bad for him, but instead I cracked open a beer and toasted to his future as a drooling vegetable. Unfortunately for the human race, he recovered. I still watch Pats game just hoping that each blow to the head will be his last.

    Fuck that cocky cock-gobbling donkey fucker.

  573. Lazy Pug Says:

    @ Westbrook…
    HUGE +1 for Giada….I hate that bitch.
    HUGE -1 for NJ though.

    I’ll pick…Ann Coulter. Get run over by a steamroller, skag.

  574. jackin'4beats Says:

    Jeez…this is what I get for having to work on Friday. Fack you very much KSK, FACK YOU IN THE EYES.

    To next week’s draft…

  575. Pistol Says:

    Stuart Scott, Fuck Him.

  576. theeagleman Says:

    the most unfunny human ever created: Carlos Mencia

  577. Grant Park Braves Says:

    Bob Seager. He sings too many songs about rock and roll.

  578. sdbruin Says:

    drafts that never die

  579. Rar288 Says:

    USHER. I saw his “performance” on SNL and I wanted to stab myself in the chest.

    I’ll draft another one because this thread is dead anyways… not many people know him except people in Chicago but Mike Fontenot. He gets his share of hits and everything but I just hate his tiny guts.

  580. TommyBowlcut Says:

    Sting

  581. marmatard Says:

    I guess no one mentioned Jessica Simpson yet since it would be considered ‘rational’. I want to punch her in her retarded face.

  582. Gino Tourettsa Says:

    Here’s an irrational pick: I actually like Jim Rome (very irrational), yet whenever he refers to Boston Red Sox outfielder Manny Ramirez as “Man Ram”, I want beat him to death, slowly, with extreme brutally, with a tack hammer (very rational).

  583. Dirty Sanchez Says:

    M. Night Shyamalan and the people that encourage him not to commit suicide.

    He is not a genius with one decent movie.

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