A Brief Review Of “Deion And Pilar: Prime Time Love”
The great Pat Jordan wrote a piece on sports journalism for Slate last week. In it, he detailed a meeting he had with Deion Sanders. Here’s the money quote.
He was a sullen, unpleasant, nonverbal man. I thought maybe I could break down his reticence by taking him and his girlfriend out to dinner. She ordered for him, then cut up his steak and fed it to him.
Read that a few times just to digest it. This was a grown man so emotionally stunted he needed his girlfriend to cut up his food and feed it to him. Jesus. So, as you can imagine, I tuned into “Deion & Pilar: Prime Time Love” on the Oxygen network (Oxygen: It’s Lifetime, Without The Beatings!) the other night expecting one thing: to see Pilar cut up Deion’s food and feed it to him like the goddamn retard that he is.
Instead, I got Pilar scheming with a friend about what to do with “spousal allowance”. She settled on getting a chef and a nanny. Because she doesn’t like doing anything, you see. Watching this show is about as interesting as watching my dick go limp.
I got a better idea, Pilar. How about you used that thoroughly unearned money to buy your husband a training spoon, a burp cloth and a pack of Luvs. Then I can watch you try and keep him from being a drooling idiot. CUT THAT MEAT, GIRLFRIEND! CUT THAT MEAT!
Tags: Bill simmons thinks it's better than Animal House, horrible TV, I don't even know what this show is supposed to be, we watch so you don't have to, worse than Living Lohan
May 29th, 2008 at 3:09 pm
I met Neon Deon twice and he as a douchebag both times… I’d like to feed him some rate poison
May 29th, 2008 at 3:17 pm
Seriously, why does anyone watch these reality shows? Is that interesting to watch rich people spend their lives on petty bullshit?
May 29th, 2008 at 3:44 pm
I remember one time, years ago, when the Cubs played the Giants, Deion was in the batting circle. Well, I was drunk enough to be yelling at Deion (like 15 feet from him) the entire time he was warming-up. He never flinched. Until now, I thought it was stoic professionalism. But I now realize it could have been that he’s an addle-brained moron who apparently can’t even feed himself. That was a good game - almost got thrown out of Wrigley…
May 29th, 2008 at 3:49 pm
I just took a shit.
I’m gonna try to get it its own show on E! next season.
May 29th, 2008 at 3:53 pm
Bill Simmons wrote something?
May 29th, 2008 at 4:08 pm
Hey, he was smart enough to dump a bucket of ice water on Tim McCarver. Not the bucket of shit McCarver deserves of course, but you go to war with the bucket you have, not the bucket you wish you had, or something.
May 29th, 2008 at 4:14 pm
I’ll bet right now on Oxygen or Lifetime there’s a movie with Meredith Baxter-Byrnie getting beaten by her husband or coping with breast cancer. I’d check, but I think my TV would refuse and then call me gay.
May 29th, 2008 at 4:16 pm
i’d like to hear a conversation between deion and devin hester
May 29th, 2008 at 4:38 pm
The show can’t be any better than keeping up with cardassians. I find it amazing that they could have that many retards in one family. I would have thought Darwinism would have taken care of all them by now.
May 29th, 2008 at 4:54 pm
KKK’s late dad Robert Kardashian was on OJ’s defense team, so those girls must have inherited some industrial-strength sleaze in their DNA that counteracts their stupidty.
May 29th, 2008 at 5:02 pm
I feel bad for Bruce Jenner, it’s sad to see a great American hero get into that family. I find it funny that you never see any of his children from the previous marriage.
May 29th, 2008 at 5:10 pm
@Kyle - Except for Brody on the hills.
/Is not gay at all…
May 29th, 2008 at 5:18 pm
Bruce Jenner looks like an old lesbian.
May 29th, 2008 at 5:37 pm
The show can’t be any better than keeping up with cardassians
Star Trek characters have a reality show now too?
WTF?!?!?!
May 29th, 2008 at 5:40 pm
Holy Shit! Are you guys really worth $1,265,046???
http://juicedsportsblog.com/2008/05/top-100-valuable-sportsblogs.html
May 29th, 2008 at 5:50 pm
Holy fuck. You guys aren’t as stupid as you seem. So whose mother’s basement will get renovated?
May 29th, 2008 at 5:51 pm
Oxygen: It’s Lifetime, Without The Beatings!
Well said. I’ve never understood why a channel aimed at female viewers consists of nothing but women getting the ever-loving shit kicked out of them.
May 29th, 2008 at 7:15 pm
Holy Shit! Are you guys really worth $1,265,046???
Apparently, not to people who have $1,265,046 to spend.
May 29th, 2008 at 7:37 pm
Denton should be gargling Will’s balls around the clock.
May 29th, 2008 at 7:47 pm
I inadvertantly caught a bit of this. It’s like the Hulk Hogan show, except everyone’s black. And all i could think about was how the once-spectacular Deion Sanders was absolute shit with the Ravens. Youd’a think he’d have learned from Jerry Rice.
May 29th, 2008 at 8:15 pm
I give Deion props, at least the bitch is hot. Nothing I hate more than ugly chicks with attitude problems.
May 29th, 2008 at 8:37 pm
I feel bad for Bruce Jenner, it’s sad to see a great American hero get into that family. I find it funny that you never see any of his children from the previous marriage.
I think they used their skin to pull off his Joan Riversesque face lift.
May 29th, 2008 at 10:43 pm
So… you’re saying you watch Living Lohan?
May 30th, 2008 at 1:38 pm
Pilar = totally bangable.
June 4th, 2008 at 12:22 pm
You clowns have never played a down in your life, you jealous fags, I will whip your candy asses, Deion is 10 fold the man you will ever be. Terds