Hines Ward Takes The Culinary Tour
04.16.08New skedurre lereased yesday and I go to see shitty we pray in foll new season. Look foll prace make fun in week befoll game. No need go Creverand, since me know is Mistake by Rake.
I go first Furryderphia. We pray there Numbell Shree Week.
Furryderphia have many things rike scalee peeper who thlow battlee at Annual Gift Man. And eat thing like sclapper.
Sclapper not make smirre.
But they eat also cheesestick.
Maybe get Furryderphia cheesestick.
WHAT THIS!?
IS SO LACIST!
No way I get cheesestick now!
“Fuck you. We getting steak.”
Who that?
“Your black half. The one who don’t be jumbling all the L’s and R’s. The one who been trying to repress ever since you tried to connect to your cornerstore owning, police calling, landlording heritage. And I didn’t come all the way to gat damn Philly to not get some steak.”
I so confuse!
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Beginning a site like this one led me to start some research and I found your post to be very helpful. My site is centered around the idea curing cancer by stopping the angiogenic process. I wish you good luck with your writing in the future and I’ll definitely keep an eye on you.
Any chance we can get a Hines Ward/Marmalard Crossover Extravaganza?
I give this tree smirre.
YA BETTA ASK SOMEBODAYYYYYYYYY!
to all commenters who feel the need to call this racist:
Is this making fun of Korean Americans or Korean American stereotypes?
I’ll give you a hint…it’s the latter
this isn’t funny, what are you guys talking about? I mean, it’s really boring.
10 smirre for bambi.
@ smurphette
maybe the new format brought changes to the KSK’ers, maybe UM is finally black
I’m still perplexed at the concept of buying cookies at Blockbuster? What, Hollywood Video was closed?
Why does it seem like the new format has brought out all these commenters who apparently have never read the site before today? Brady doesn’t know if Ape is Asian, BigRedMachine is apparently unfamiliar with the smirres of Hines Wald, what the hell is going on?!
Mah, I arweez rove-a deez Hinah Warr poss! Make-a raff rongtime!
+1 to Dick_Gozinia.
I’m Asian and I think we all need to lay off the Ape. He always brings the funny. I mean the guy writes touchy-feely personal interest stories in a dying medium by day and foul-mouthed, racist blog entries by night. Sounds like a superhero to me.
Anyone who uses numbers in their handle is pretty creative in my book. They sell cookies at Blockbuster?
Yay, you’re a fucking racist with a creativity deficit. Next time I come visit you at Blockbuster, remind me to buy you a cookie. Seriously, is this the best you have?
.. Now my Indian half wants some gobi ka paranta and daal roti. And I have a strange inclination to do someone’s taxes.
Neveeeeeeer……
How can it be a waste of five minutes if it was worth it?
i knew from the sight it was scrapple and… sclapper may be my new favorite word
The reference to “Annual Gift Man” alone was worth the five minutes I wasted reading this.
When Hines Ward walks into a Korean-owned corner store in a black neighborhood, he must be the most confused and conflicted man on the planet.
Wow. That is some funny shit. Awesome, Ape.
The fact that I’m Korean-American and that my grandmother still speaks like this gives me the biggest shit-eating grin every time I read these. Ape you forgot laundromat-owning. We have lots of raundlomats and do a rot of lraundly
Hines Wald make me smirre evely time. Brack Hines need to hide, beclaws that lestelaunt is so lacist! And Hines not even Chine-lese.
Is it harder to stare someone down with slanty eyes? I feel like maybe you wouldn’t get the full effect. I mean, your opponent might just think the sun is shining really brightly behind him.
@ Brady:
To be fair, though, colon cancer is pretty fucking funny.
“Sclapper” like to kill me laughing. You had to be cracking up writing this. Fucking sclapper!
Chink’s is in my neighborhood, actually. Good cheesesteak, but not great.
The best in the city is at John’s Roast Pork.
PS I find coron cancel hirarious
This piece of blog is about as funny as colon cancer. You better be a self deprecating Asian Ape or I’m going to have to stare your ass down with my slanty eyes, beat you senseless with my nunchucks, pick your eyeballs out with my chopsticks, and roll them up in some seaweed to consume with my flied lice you plick.
Ape looks a lot different without his glasses on
It’s all true. The battery barrage is why Annual Gift Man had to move to the moon.
The next Herschel Walker???
Sclorr down, Webstar
hey i just realized…where are the links on the side? you guys too good to give love to LOLjocks?
where will i get my caption humor now?
Speak Engrish sign at Geno’s Cheesestick may not be A-OK numble 1 for Mr. Ward when he comes to Furry.