Another Seven-Diamond Specimen, Governor Spitzer?
I know what it’s like to be a man of integrity. Despite what the papers and, on occasion, the authorities have had cause to say about me, I’m an honest businessman and, you, a servant of the people.
It appears our arrangement may have landed you in a spot of hot water. For this, I am sorry. When entering into such a transaction, I’m afraid there’s the expectation of a considerable amount of risk for someone of your position. Xiochita tells me of your many positions.
You have been a valued customer, to be sure. Your night-long sessions with the Diabolical Diana at $5,500 an hour put me in pink Gators for life.
I hope with arrival of your sudden legal trouble there won’t be the temptation to tell the authorities of our dealings. It would accomplish little to palliate your predicament. I also think the consequences could be somewhat dire for your loved ones, as well as your friend and fellow client, Mr. Umenyiora.
Many have called you something of a latter-day Eliot Ness. I suppose I should have foreseen this being something of a problem. There can’t be two of us, you see. I mean, look at my hat! The role was clearly mine for always.
Tags: silky garrard, xmas ape
March 10th, 2008 at 3:43 pm
Many of called you something of a latter-day Eliot Ness
“Let’s do some good… hookers.”
March 10th, 2008 at 3:48 pm
Damn you quick. It’s almost like you had the inside information on him hiring a girl to visit him when he was in DC.
March 10th, 2008 at 3:53 pm
“There can’t be two of us, you see. I mean, look at my hat! The role was clearly mine for always.”
So very true, but Elliot Ness wore Burgundy color shoes.
/well, they looked that way in The Untouchables
March 10th, 2008 at 3:56 pm
Today, thousands of people around the country are celebrating Client #9!
March 10th, 2008 at 4:03 pm
I love my pink gators.
March 10th, 2008 at 4:08 pm
Anyone know the conversion rate between diamonds and smirres?
March 10th, 2008 at 4:13 pm
If Spitzer had dealt with I’m a Pimp Named Slickback, none of this would’ve happened.
March 10th, 2008 at 4:14 pm
Not by coincidence, the diamond rating was established by determining just how many diamonds you have to buy Mrs. Spitzer after the press conference.
March 10th, 2008 at 4:19 pm
I think Kobe set the base line for Diamond buying.
/realizes basketball reference, but only way to make the point
March 10th, 2008 at 4:22 pm
client #8 was…..Bill Belichick
March 10th, 2008 at 4:42 pm
Ahh, the heterosexual heir to the McGreevy throne…
March 10th, 2008 at 4:59 pm
I guess, unlike Wade, the Guv WAS VERY COMFORTABLE at a club. The Emporer’s Club, that is.
/TOUCHABLE
March 10th, 2008 at 5:22 pm
Love the possible irony of Spitzer getting slammed with RICO charges, since that was probably his most powerful tool during his career as a prosecutor. Also, love Eliot Ness in The Untouchables with the 3-piece suit.
March 10th, 2008 at 5:25 pm
Love the possible irony of Spitzer getting slammed with RICO charges, since that was probably his most powerful tool during his career as a prosecutor..
he blatantly abused his power in my biz…heres a makers on the rocks to you..elliot, we hardly knew you!
March 10th, 2008 at 8:03 pm
@nashville
Bellichik only goes for the married ladies…
If it ain’t cheating, it’s not worth doing.
March 10th, 2008 at 10:15 pm
(Bleep)ing Giants fans!!! Win the Super Bowl and just lose all sense of everything. Spitzer is a putz.
March 10th, 2008 at 10:34 pm
Sonofabitch looks like Marlo Stanfield.
/pisses on Cheese.
March 11th, 2008 at 12:00 am
You’re with me hooker.
March 11th, 2008 at 9:29 am
Question- What does $5,500/hr get you?
And would you be spoiled for regular sex afterwards?
March 11th, 2008 at 9:34 am
How much spritzer could Spitzer swallow, if Spitzer could swallow spritzer?
March 11th, 2008 at 9:59 am
You’ve got to love how Silky keeps popping up. It’s last year’s Off Season Adventures of Michael Vick. When OSAoMV started he was just a moron who smoked weed. He blossomed into a full recuring story. I feel like Silky has the same potential.
Anyway, it’s quite ironic that after Spitzer resigns (I’m sure he will), all the governors in the tri-state area will have originially gotten their position because their boss resigned.
WV: jovpee (I dont even know what to make of that)