Daaaahkie Day is Really Paytreeuts Day
All ya haters say we gowt a problem with tha daaaahkies in Bahstan but we elected a black gov’nah in Massachusetts and it’s nice to see the daaaahkies finally gave us something in return: A day off to celebrate tha Paytreeuts domination a’ tha Chaaaaaarjahs and a return to tha Sooper Bowl! 18-0, ya shitbawxes!
Naturally, there’s Welkah finding the endzone, like always. And Tommy Brady overcoming a few minor setbacks, nah thanks to that lazy daaaarkie Moss. What’s with being a non-factah in the playoffs, ya shiftless daaaahkie!
January 21st, 2008 at 10:52 am
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz…
January 21st, 2008 at 11:06 am
What do you mean Moss was a non-factah? The all-knowing Bill Simmons said, “Do you really think Randy Moss — someone who always shows up for big games — isn’t coming out of Round 2 with one huge play?” So of course Moss was a factah…wait, what? He only had 2 catches in two playoff games? Bill Simmons was emasculated by his hag of a wife for the 2nd season in a row and both still need to die slow and agonizing deaths?
January 21st, 2008 at 11:29 am
Moss was doing a lot of lead-blocking on those 15 yard Faulk and Welker pickups. He also had a sweet block on Castillo where he took two chargers out of the play.
Oh, I’m sorry. You were trying to be funny. I’ll show myself out.
January 21st, 2008 at 11:32 am
Manning will be in town early for the big (squash)game.
http://arizona.us-squash.org/news/2008-grand-canyon-state-games-squash-tucson/
January 21st, 2008 at 11:40 am
There are far too many R’s in this post for it to be authentic.
…should that be “faah too many aaaah’s”?
January 21st, 2008 at 11:52 am
Can we please just nuke Boston already? I mean come on now…
January 21st, 2008 at 11:59 am
By the way, any takers on the “GAY-TRIOTS” t-shirts yet?
January 21st, 2008 at 12:09 pm
I’m glad to see that Boston now refers to African Americans as “darkies” instead of “spooks”.
Progress is progress, folks.
Boston - we salute you!
January 21st, 2008 at 12:11 pm
@mike
“Spook” means “spy” now.
January 21st, 2008 at 12:28 pm
so should they change it to “spook vs. spy” so you can differentiate between the white spy and the black spy?
January 21st, 2008 at 1:33 pm
I just thought I’d point out that thebostonchannel.com (ABC affiliate here in Mass) has a story on the main page about how MLK was actually unpopular with a majority of people and not the great, popular leader we remember him as.
Awesome story to run on the day of his memory.
I fucking hate my local news.
January 21st, 2008 at 1:49 pm
As a former masshole (I moved out) it’s sad to say that the satire is pretty spot on for too many people.
The only complaint is that I have never heard a person called a shitbawx. Plenty of cars (or cahs) but no people.
January 21st, 2008 at 2:23 pm
I just finished reading “Letter from A Birmingham Jail.” It is powerful stuff. Dr. King mentions how the white religious leaders of Southern towns such as Birmingham and Albany, Georgia can overcome their apathy towards the civil rights movement and embrace true moral justice.
Then he gets around to Boston, and all King writes is, “Man, fuck those pasty micks sideways.”
True story!
January 21st, 2008 at 2:48 pm
Did you know that MLK went to Boston University for his doctorate? And that he plagiarized his thesis?
FREAKIN DAHKIE!
January 21st, 2008 at 3:50 pm
HEY APE THIS IS TOMMY FROM QUINZEE YOU FACKIN DAHKIE LOVING HOMOOOOO
COME UP HEEAH TO BAWSTON AND SAY THAT SHIT TO MY FACE, YEAH THATS WHAT I THOUGHT YA FACKIN QUEE-AH!!!!!!!!
January 21st, 2008 at 5:14 pm
It boggles the mind to think of the amount of clearcutting that had to occur to provide each and every Masshole with a stick to ram up their ass.
January 21st, 2008 at 7:05 pm
They only have one stick. They just take turns ramming it up each others asses.
January 22nd, 2008 at 11:53 am
Sharing one stick? That’s disgusting! It’s how disease gets spread. Don’t those Massholes know that it’s cold and flu season. I hope they use protection, like a glove.
January 22nd, 2008 at 6:15 pm
This isn’t funny at all. Boston has the same racism as any major city.
Sincerely,
Generic blogger name