YA FAHGAT ABOUT WEL-KAH!!!
12.18.07
Ya gutta be fackin jokin, right? You mean to tell me Dr. Underneath and his 1,000 yards receiving and, most importantly, his luscious white skin isn’t good enough for your precious Pro Bowl squad, NFL? Somebody get Goodell on the phone. I feel like bellyachin’.
What’d I only buy two versions of his fackin jersey for, then? Because I was saving room for the Wes Wel-kah Pro Bowl jersey. My regular rotation goes: Papelbon All-Star jersey, Scalabrine jersey, my “Charles River Not Charles Drew River” shirt, ” and my “Celtic Green Not Pumpsie Green” hoodie. This woulda fit in perfect.
Three of the Pats eight Pro Bowlers are coloreds. That’s almost half! That ain’t right, I tell ya. I got half a mind to go back to not giving a damn about this team. Did me okay from 1960 until 2001.
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I think my family tree is a few branches short of full bloom.
having only lived in three places- maine, massachusetts, and north carolina- I’d have to say north carolina is by far the most racist. percentage of minorities definitely does not inversely correlate with racism.
I’ve lived in Boston since 1997, and by far the most popular althlete since I’ve been here is Pedro. Yes, the Boston media is probably biased toward white players, but as far as the general fan base goes, that is definitely not true.
Barry (aka still dickless asswipe who’s now so lame that he also needs to steal Drew’s lines),
I’m talking about the culture of the place, you rhetorically challenged fucktard, not whether individuals deserve to be called Americans (as citizens, they obviously are). As I pointed out, there’s no other place in America where you see such pathetic, hopeless, European-style obsession with ethnic segregation and class identity (though the NY area has some of this too).
Even a shit-for-3-brain-cells tool like you could pick up on that much.
@eric – AKA eric_the_viking_boat_cum_queen@rehiremiketice.com (that’s a before and after, Sajak)
It appears you may be on to something. That something closely resembles a sybian machine.
Are you trying to say that people who’s families have been here for 6 or 7 generations are not yet Americans, or don’t ‘deserve’ to be called Americans? What does it take to become an American in your (bloodshot from cum) eyes?
Where do you live? When was the last time you were in Boston?
My favorite comment was the one about how randy moss is only as open as he is because wes welker draws coverage underneath. Because, as we all know, slow white possession receivers scare DCs a lot more than fast guys who can score from anywhere. “NO URLACHER NO WAY” is a close second for hilarious racism.
Just as a side note: Everyone living in the MA-RI area isn’t a Patriots fan, thank God (this week was the first time and maybe only time I’ve been glad to meet a Cowboys fan). So the argument about black people living there is a straw man anyway.
@ Peter
I don’t know what “strongest” black communities means, but I’ve been to Taunton. Nice try. It seemed significantly whiter than any place I’ve been in my life. Anyway, I don’t think a list of towns in Massachusetts that contain black people proves much of anything, other than that there’s pretty prevalent de facto segregation.
Barry (aka lame, dickless asswipe that needs to come up with stupid-ass fake e-mail addresses to feel cool),
Any city that insists on having such ridiculous ethnic ghettoization even among white people who are 6th or 7th-generation American citizens doesn’t deserve to be called American. And let’s not even get started with all the pathetic class obsessions, like the upper classes insisting on speaking with different accents and showing different mannerisms than the lower classes, and vice versa. Thoroughly British.
@eric (AKA cum_dumpster_eric@freewheelingcocktwinks.com)
“Boston’s too European in its sensibilities to be called truly American”
Are you serious??? Boston is not truly American? What the fuck is it then? Where do you come up with this shit?
Um, peter, I think you missed the point.
@crazy little thing
Ah-HA!! So it is YOU who is showing your true, racist colors. So everyone who lives in New Hampshire just MOVED their to get away from minorities? You are presuming that there is something bad about minorities that people should want to get away from…interesting…..
Really, Jake? I think the idea of “Irish” and “Italian” neighborhoods (quotations marks needed since the ancestors of these people came across the pond more than a century ago) would seem pretty ridiculous in Dallas, Phoenix, Seattle, etc.
Boston’s too European in its sensibilities to be called truly American. So is Manhattan, in its own way.
Let’s ignore for a second that generalizing about a group of people because of their geographic place of origin is almost as bad as generalizing based on the color of one’s skin, and take a look at this post from a different angle.
Was it supposed to be funny? “You’re all racists lol”. Was it the mass-hole voice that was supposed to do it?
Generally this blog is pretty damn funny. This one left me scratching my head.
@burma jones: “It seems like people who live in more diverse areas feel like it’s somehow a badge of honor like X-mas Ape bragging about his 45% black high school. Who gives a fuck? There are probably more racists in an area like that simply due to more interaction and more room for bad experiences.”
Wow, way to show your racist colors. Living around black people is certain to make a person racist, so you live in New Hampshire to get away from it all.
The most popular player other than Brady on the Patriots? Troy Brown. There are way more Moss jerseys than Welker, and more Seymour jerseys than Light or any of the white OL.
People love to pretend Boston is somehow as racist as the South because there is an Italian area, some Irish neighborhoods, Jewish neighborhoods, and black neighborhoods. Problem is, thats how it is in every city. Its just that Boston was such a leader in making sure fire hoses and nooses weren’t what maintained those neighborhoods in the South that insecure people like to pretend Boston neighborhoods are somehow morally different than Harlem, Chinatown, Little Italy, etc.
What? Ray-Ray is Jewish? Uh, I was just kidding about that racist comment… I love Jews! And Blacks! And Murderers! And Teams that lose to the Dolphins! Go Ravens!
It’s nice that a post by a whiny Steelers fan who has realized over the last two weeks that his team has NO chance prompted an actual discussion about race issues.
So New England is the only place in the U.S. where racism exists? I didn’t realize that.
It’s true. I live in Boston and I’m racist… but against the Jews not the Blacks. The only reason I love Welker is because he’s the closest thing to Troy Brown we’ve got these days.
Last night on ESPN Mike Golic claimed that Wes Welker was “the MVP of the Patriots’ offense” this season. Huh. Really. Not the two sure-fire Hall of Famers that light it up every Sunday? Nope, it’s Wes Welker.
So clearly we have moved into Eckstein Country with the Wes Welker love fest. Welker is pretty much the textbook definition of “nice player,” no more than that. Get a grip.
u.u- not one, but two
maybe you didn’t realize dcd was a Massengil b/c (a) he’s black and (b) his name isn’t Marky, Ricky, Danny, Terry, Mikey, Davey, Timmy, Tommy, Joey, Robby, Johnny, or Brian.
they probably elected the brother just to ‘prove’ they’re not racist. as though being next to Maine wasn’t evidence enough.
I can’t believe not one Mass-hole has not pointed out the fact that the governor of the state is a black guy.
wow, I would think that would be the first bullet you guys would use to defend yourself against the charge of racism.
@burma-shave: ok. ? no black people=no racism.
is that your final solution to the problem of racism in America?
@chip f.u.: all true xcept 5). some of my best friends are black Patriots fans.
Reading this post makes me fack up some smaht kids.
To answer everyone’s questions and wrap up the discussion: 1) massholes are racist, 2) no one in New England cared about football before 2001, 3) no one in New England knows anything about football now, 4) Wes Welker doesn’t deserve the Pro Bowl, and 5) there are no black Patriots fans.
Thx.
True story, I was at the Rangers game last night sitting in front of a Bostonian family. They commented about how shocked they were that “those kind of people” came to hockey games, when a black couple walked by. Later they asked my girlfriend about hotels that aren’t in more “urban” areas. But again, not a lick of racism up there.
yeah, Lost, I mean, I think that’s kind of my point. In certain places in the country, race issues simply don’t come up. Lots of New England is like that because the population is overwhelmingly white. That doesn’t mean people are racist. It just means its not something that affects people’s daily lives.
Burma-Shave.
We’ve No Race Problem…
No Racism Here…
I live in New Hampshire and 97% of the state is white. I know very few racists.
uhhhhh…..
fuckit. nevermind.
I don’t wear it as a badge of honor. It was a middle class school regardless of its racial demographics . It was wasn’t the hood, but it certainly wasn’t some tony private school like Sidwell Friends either, which is what Andrew was trying to say was my background.
These race/Boston posts always go over so well. I really don’t understand what racial demographics have to do with racist attitudes. I live in New Hampshire and 97% of the state is white. I know very few racists. But you can’t expect people to apologize for where they live or what the racial breakdown of their community is. It seems like people who live in more diverse areas feel like it’s somehow a badge of honor like X-mas Ape bragging about his 45% black high school. Who gives a fuck? There are probably more racists in an area like that simply due to more interaction and more room for bad experiences. I prefer KSK posts that are funny and lead to funny comments.
Fairfax is conservative because it’s full of spies, and they like to be paid. Monty County is liberal because it’s full of people who are afraid to live in DC but don’t approve of Ffx. PG is a great place to get shot by a cop. What do I have to do to start a MoCoFlaWa?
Now that the Celts don’t suck anymore, I’d hope most of their fans would want to fill Scalabrine’s roster spot with someone more useful, like maybe a fluffer for Garnett.
@unitard- by ‘you people’ do you mean Massengil idiots who use their butt-buddy’s first name as their own?
Why the hell does anyone over the age of 12 wear a replica jersey anyway?
Jesus Assfisting Christ! That was horrifying.
I think we need some sort of gate to keep “you people” out.
lack of minorities does not equal racists, dumbasses.
Since that is what nearly every commentor used for evidence of racists in the population, i now understand why most of you think NE is full of racists.
Its because you are all fucking stupid.
By the way miami diesel, MLK went to BU, dipshit.
Ape, you forgot to mention the throw back Neely, Bourque, and Orr hockey jersey that Pats, Sox, and Celtic fan also has in his wardrobe rotation.
I just would like to know what thebigo thinks.
@ dcd: you must of have missed the crucial sentence that said, “You know who else they elected?”
@ Tecmo: That it is, you are right, but damn if those woods don’t house alot of fuckin hippies and plant workers.
miamidiesel@ Actually, George Allen was a senator that made the racial comment, you’re thinking about Douglas Wilder who was Virginia’s black governor, and he didn’t say any such thing. And I’m not trying to pick a fight or anything like that, because every one has their own experiences which are valid, but I just think it’s sad so many people, minorities and otherwise feel that Boston has three K’s stamped on top of it…I’m especially surprised your relatives that were in the college communities, typically very liberal areas, felt the sting…
Anyway, throw some boobs up here or something Ape…we can all agree on a fine pair of tits…
Gah, sorry. You’re right, that’s probably a joke. If I wasn’t on a vampire schedule right now my brain would probably work better. Damn exam week.
@ nhz
I think that was the joke :)
@ twoeightnine
10 feet is pretty fuckin huge. Could you lift it? No. i don’t think so.
Scalabrine sucks. He was every celtics fans’ scapegoat until this year when playing along the likes of greats like KG, Sugar Ray and The Troof have made it easier to mask his thousands of weaknesses. I haven’t been to any games this year but I have been told that the cheers you hear when he enters the game are mostly sarcastic and I really, really pray that that’s true.
ryan – The NHL doesn’t have very many black players to begin with…
It’s why the Bruins don’t have a single black player on their roster.
They built a huge statue of a fictional character in the middle of town? Really?
The “huge statue” barely stands 10′ tall. The “huge statue” that they built is actually a movie prop that Stallone donated to the city to thank them for allowing him to film there. The “huge statue” in the middle of the town actually sat 6 miles south of the middle of the town, in the no-man’s land of the sports complex for the past 23 years until the black mayor decided to move it to the Art Museum to use as a tourist attraction.
Philadelphia might have its race problems like all cities but using a statue as an example of that is quite possibly the stupidest argument that I’ve ever heard in my life.
The argument that Scalabrine relates better to his black teammates than the city of Boston was pretty good too. Just because someone was born in Long Beach doesn’t mean that they grew up in the hood. Scalabrine grew up in Enumclaw, Washington with it’s whopping .3% black population.
lol @ Miamidiesel
the notion of philly being less racist is hilarious. That city built a HUGE statue of a FICTIONAL CHARACTER in the middle of town when it was the city that raised one of the greatest boxers who ever lived just coz he’s black and everyone in that town seems to just be fine with it!
@john john: western mass is basically just the woods though. Everything west of Worcester is basically North Connecticut.
the racism in Boston thing is a classic stereotype that nobody ever seems able to prove but people like Mike Wilbon love to throw around like an incend. grenade into any conversation and can never provide even anecdotal evidence. Oh those wily racists, never around when you need ‘em!
Fair point, Ape, but that’s kinda like saying the Vikings aren’t that bad, considering they’re in the NFC. (No offense, Drew. No disrespect to Purple Jesus, of course.)
That’s probably pretty accurate. MoCo is pretty blanketly liberal, but NoVA isn’t all that conservative, y’know, considering it’s part of Virginia.
Good to know, Ape. I guess I always just thought of both counties as having way better schools than the rest of their respective states, and that the main differences were political/racial demographics rather than economic.
@miamidiesel – Thanks :)
So the assumption that all Massengills use their real names on blogspot because they lack creativity and diversity in their lives is proven true once again.
Great job boys.
Avenue Q doesn’t really lie about anything, actually.
And that includes being as loud as the hell you want when you’re making love.
Everyone’s a little bit racist.
So Avenue Q didn’t lie to me?
seriously, other than catches, there is no statistic that welker is even in the top 4 for. His touchdowns only happen cause moss is always doubled and tom brady has gets about 30 seconds of time from his line to complete a pass. possession receivers dont belong in the pro-bowl period.
Everyone’s a little bit racist. This is not exclusive to Boston area sports fans, or white people. Arguing over what places/cities are more racist…well, you’re arguing about the worst part of the given place. It’s not surprising that no one’ll come out of that conversation happy.
There’s a guy on there that was pissed that Braylon Edwards got in. What a dipshit.
Dude, I just read that article that was linked. First they talk about Welker, then a bunch of them praise Vrabel for making it. THEN to top that off, someone says something about Matt Light getting the respect he deserves, and then this gem.
“NO Urlacher! NO WAY”
Someone try and tell me that Boston sports fans aren’t racist in their own way. Please.
mmm… gotta love the obligatory, lets sh** on Boston because our own city/franchise is abysmal post.
/dick joke
Christmas Ape, go to bed. You can’t please everybody.
(That said, I was going to go to bed and then read all of these fucking comments. Jebus. The whole fucking country is racist. You’re right about New England. Mail Simmons a Moss jersey for Christmas. I’m going to bed.)
As a fantasy owner of Wes Welker for the weeks before he started blowing up and scoring 30 points a game, I say no, he doesn’t deserve to go to the Pro Bowl.
As a fantasy owner who traded Wes Welker right after he started blowing up and scoring 30 points a game, I deserve to be forced to watch the Pro Bowl.
Now can we get some motherfuckin’ Buccaneers on the NFC squad?
Not to turn this into a rational discussion, but I think Pats fans should take much more pride in that 3 freaking offensive lineman got named to the team. Honestly, if Brady doesn’t have 5 fucking minutes to pick apart teams, Welker wouldn’t have those gaudy numbers as a slot receiver. The rest of the media is too busy circle jerking Brady and Belicheck, at least loyal Pats fans can give the O-line their due.
@smurphette: thanks. +1 for watching the Boondocks. And another +1 for being a chick that watches the Boondocks. I salute you.
It depends what part of the county you’re talking about, smurphette. MoCo is just like D.C. in that everything west of Rock Creek Park is all rich whiteytown. I grew up near the PG County border, which is pretty diverse and working to middle class.
@miamidiesel – +1 for the Boondocks reference. That show is the balls.
@xmas ape – I have always supposed that MoCo is basically like Fairfax County (where I grew up), but with greater diversity and fewer Republicans. Your high school numbers certainly seem to reflect that.
On an unrelated note “Celtic Green not Pumpsie Green” and to an even greater extent “Charles River not Charles Drew River” are both fucking brilliant.
Well, that sucked.
Also, being born and having half my family live in Western Mass, I can attest to the fact that regardless of our sterling history (You are welcome for W.E.B. Dubois) There are about as many black faces around there now as in a Friends episode.
Oh and I haven’t got any statiscal data to back that up as I am drunk and my Wiki searches right now are reserved for finding out the hometowns of my favorite pornstars.
I mean… having spent all of my 23 years in Boston I’d say it’s safe to say that not everyone in Boston is racist in the same way that not everyone in Boston actually speaks with the much-caricatured accent. That being said, there are dumbasses everywhere, and I’m pretty sure I heard this exact conversation or something approximating it on the orange line this afternoon, AND I thought this was facking hilarious even though I sleep in a Patriots shirt. And that’s what’s important.
And the most frequently spotted sports jersey anywhere in Boston is that of Jason Varitek, who’s awesome and is also a big fat white guy. So there ya go.
Now, now boys, if you can’t get along we’ll have to call BDD to come in and give you all a spanking. Or may the Major would like that better since he’s finished his wack-off moratorium and could fully enjoy it.
Let me make it easy on you. You all suck, wherever you are from sucks, your families suck, all your teams suck, life sucks, this blog sucks.
That being said…
You’re hilarious. Great post, and overall blog.
Would you be able to link on over to http://www.tittlemyweeney.com?
I’d really appreciate it.
(and oldy but a goody)
@dcd: my moniker aside, I’ve lived in or around New York City pretty much my entire life. The only other place I’ve spent a significant amount of time is Philly, and while it has a shit-ton of other problems, I wouldn’t say it’s a racist city. I’ve had two close cousins go to Boston schools (Tufts and BU), and another who married a guy from Harvard. Not to get all Wilbon on you, but I’ve spent a good amount of time in Boston, I’m a minority, and… let’s just say I didn’t feel as welcome there as I do back home in NYC or in Philly, and that’s regardless of whether or not I’m wearing anything indicating my Giants/Yankees/Knicks ties. As for electing the only black governor in the US right now, you know who else did that? Virginia in 1989. You know who else they elected? George Allen, a dipshit who unapologetically referred to a member of my community as “macaque” and still almost got re-elected. I don’t look at politics – especially in the US – as an indicator of progress in race relations, because so much of politics in this country is about special interests and making the rich guys who pull the strings richer or keeping those in power in power to satisfy their ego trips (and I’m not just saying that because I’ve been binge-viewing Season 4 of The Wire on DVD). If Barack Obama were elected President, would that be a sign that the US is a more racially tolerant place than… err.. I don’t know how to finish that sentence either. You get the point though. Sorry for veering off the normal course here at KSK…
/dick joke
It has nothing to do with whining. The post was inspired by a Pats fan who sent us the link complaining about how embarrassed he was about all the Welker comments to the Globe post.
Yeah, the Pats have owned the Steelers since about 2000. Doesn’t make any of the points addressed in the post or the comments any less true.
And of course by the time my slow-ass types, the point’s already been addressed. Guhhhh…
Oh my gosh, you like, TOTALLY got me. The best part about this article is that it is just residual whining from the Pats wiping their asses with the Steelers last week and OWNING them for the last six years.
I’d check the census to see what percentage of Pittsburgh is black, but since people are moving out of the city so quickly there probably isn’t an accurate one available.
@andrew:
From D.C. Steeler Nation:
Born in Allentown, Pa. and raised in the D.C. ‘burbs, yet a lifelong Steelers fan. How bullshit is that?
Get your shit straight and know your target before you attack. That said, I agree that Shittsburg is a total shithole and isn’t exactly… err… I have no idea how to finish that. What place exactly qualifies as a model of racial harmony? Anyways, as a minority, I’d still feel a helluva lot safer banging a white woman (or 2… or 3… or god-willing as many as I could handle at once until my nutsack cried “No more!”) in Pittsburgh than in Boston; statistics indicate I’d be 8798% less likely to have a shotgun shoved in my face in Pittsburgh for socializing with a white woman, and 12979% less likely to have a shotgun shoved in my face for being a minority in general. So go suck out that Brady-Belichick-Welker “chowdah” left in the shag of your carpet from last Sunday and shut your cankhole…
miamidiesel@ I actually find it funny that someone potentially from Miami is the resident race relationship expert of Massachusetts. I’d also like to remind you that Massachusetts is currently the only state in the country with a black governor, and considering how seriously we take our politics, that’s saying something…Boston is like any other urban city, race is not necessarily the issue, success and socio-economic status is…
@Jelly B. Good: You may be right about Scal…but have you been to the Garden recently? It’s takes more than 500 guys from Southie to make that kind of noise…
My high school was 45 percent black and 15 percent white, actually.