Real name

Heather Rothstein _____________Ronald Dietz

Age

Old enough to know better _____________ 14 (but an old 14)

Height

5′ 7″________________4′ 10 1/2

Weight

Not telling _________ However much he can push

Drink of choice

Ejaculate laced with urine____ Jolly Rancher soda laced with construda

Dislikes

Eagles, apparently _______________ Mark ass tricks, trick ass marks

Favorite Movie

Eagle vs. Shark” ____________________”Run, Ronnie, Run

Hero

GoDaddy.com girl__________________MarHar/Icy Hot Stuntaz

Goals for the season

Uhhh… fuck some eagles?_____Transition smoothly from Lil’ to Yung Ad’lt

Misconceptions

Not blonde ___________ Really the Maj in an alternate universe

Finishing move

“Fleur-de-lick” ______________Ankle biting

Your thoughts in the comments about about who wins this clash of the sideshows, maybe even who wins this contest of footballery they’re holding this evening. Haven’t had one of those in a spell. I’m going Saints, 33-27.

This week, we’re holding the first annual KsK Kares Charity Drive for Fisher House, which supports disabled veterans and their families. You can donate directly to FH here.