Commenter Draft: Drinking Games
06.01.07Big Daddy Drew is in a meeting this morning — I know: I, too, thought the Dick Joke Symposium was next week — so it’s gonna be me, Captain Caveman, leading you through the draft this morning. Yeah, yeah. I like it when Drew does all the work, too. Less writing for me.
So, let’s get to it: drinking games. As always, select one game at a time and wait ten picks — not comments, but picks — until you select again. These must be real games that you have played. Any arcane or obscure games require brief explanations so that others may go forth and get drunk in that matter.
Personally, I’m sad to say that I’ve moved beyond drinking games. They tend to be too loud, and that gets in the way of me getting mellow. I prefer drinking by myself. So, I’ll be passing on the first pick — I’ll trade down for multiple picks next draft or something — but I want to make ONE THING VERY CLEAR:
That game where you throw the ping-pong ball at the pyramid of cups? It’s Beirut. Beer pong is played with paddles. Only shitheads who don’t know their drinking games call Beirut beer pong.


At South Coast Recovery, we pride ourselves on making this complicated time time as solacing as conceivable.
note: need backyard pool
jump off roof into pool, but have someone toss up an open beer, chug as much as you can before you hit the water.
Thanks, Beaver. Definitely looking forward to fatherhood, especially since I know BDD has been able to handle it.
just for posterity’s sake, here’s my college house’s greatest invention, the Celebrity Age-Guess Drinking Game.
all this requires is IMDb and some honesty. Best played with at least 4, having a beer bong on hand is also useful.
Go around a circle and throw out the name of an actor, actress, or any other celebrity who’s age can be verified with IMDb. Everyone guesses the age of the celebrity. They can only be deceased 10 years or less, and the age is counted as of the current date.
every year your off? One pull off your drink of choice. 12 or more? Beer bong/beer buddy/shotgun.
one time somebody thought Charlton Heston was in his 50s. that ended poorly.
just catching up, otto i also got your back. we may not agree on politics , but that doesn’t matter you always have good posts. seriously, i stopped coutnign how many beers i could drink or drank in one night when i was in high school.
btw, being a dad is awesome. good luck when your child arrives. it will change your life.
Got most of the way down before it turned into a pissing contest without seeing these taken. Think I have awesome value here.
1. Ring Of Fire
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ring_of_Fire_%28game%29
The rules on wiki are different to how I play. Theres no communal pint, no toilet card, no snake eyes etc. We normally try to get a variety of drinks being drunk, eg someone on vodka based, someone on whiskey etc for maximum nastiness on the communal pint.
2. 21′s
3. Fives
4. Spartan, one shot of beer a minute for 300 minutes. For those who conquer century’s too easily. This was made up after seiing 300.
5. For any english people out there the ‘soccer saturday drinking game’ is fairly brutal.
6. Pub Treasure Hunt.
2 teams, each team has to go to another pub/bar every round and steal/borrow the item on the treasure list in order. Last team to collect each item sees off their drink. Start small like a lighter, or shot glass. work your way up through chairs, tables etc until kicked out. Excellent afternoons to be had with this one.
This is exclusive to the Austin area but can be applied to your choice of establishment that has a pre-determined cutoff for a specific drink
The Trudys Challenge:
At Trudys in Austin the Mexican Martinis are so potent that there is a max of 2 period… but there are three locations… hit every one in order in the direction back to your house and drink the max (or more…you have to ask for more than the max and be officially CUT OFF) make it through all three and leave the last location and not puke… YOU WIN.
Does drinking hockey count?
Fill the water bottles with beer, and they stay ice cold for 2 hours cause it’s a fucking hockey rink, and just play hockey. No set rules, but if you get back to the bench and sucked in any way on your shift, your teammates yell drink. Leads to suspensions when done in league games. Leads to more suspensions when done in league games against another team also drinking beer while playing. Never seen a ref do it.
beirut is actually an offensive name because it is making reference to the bombs dropped on Beirut a decade or so ago.
I know I’m really, really late on this one, but some of us felt the need to take a 3 day work week…
I haven’t seen Whales Tales taken yet, and although it’s not very popular, found a decent enough set of rules. The drunker you are, the more you fuck up, the more you drink…
Golden Keg. Two teams of 12 men. Two kegs. Pour out all the beer equally into cups for both sides on a large table. Each man gets 2 pukes. Second one he’s out and the next is in. Whomever finishes or whichever team has has less cups at the last man’s second puke wins. It’s a sporting event for the ages.
Is there no time limit? This just sounds like a 24-person kegger… not that there’s anything wrong with that.
And since there’s nobody else around right now, and after almost 200 selections I think I’m safe…
Pass The Rum
Someone, say John, has a bottle of rum. Yell out their name, “Hey John, pass the rum!” They take a drink, pass the bottle, you take a drink.
“Hey Billy, pass the rum!” I take a drink, pass the bottle, they take a drink.
Serves its purpose nicely.
Day of The Beast.
24 Milwaukee’s Best Light must be consumed by one individual from the time period of 2 PM until midnight. Can consumer beer any way you want (beer bongs, shotguns, power hours, or out of can). A ‘reversal of fortune’ is grounds for disqualification.
Light beer is for children and the elderly….
Time Machine.
It’s Century Club, but double time. Yes, a shot every 30 seconds. That’s some mean efficient puking you have to do just to keep playing.
Oh, and try it with Canadian beer, motherfucker….
Beer Balls. Two teams of two, on opposite sides of a table, each person puts a full beer can in front of them. Teams take turns throwing ping pong balls at the other team’s cans — if they hit the can, they chug their beer as fast as possible until the other team retrieves the ball and puts it on the table. Goal is to finish your beers before the other team.
Booze Ring Toss. Make a ring out of straws and throw it at the back-bar. Whatever it rings around you take a shot of. Bad things happen.
Alex, I’m flattered by all the attention. Honestly, I am. But as I said before, I’m already taken. Sorry, pumpkin.
Thanks for all the support, folks. It’s been fun talking with Clint 2.0, but I didn’t want to hog him.
Golden Keg. Two teams of 12 men. Two kegs. Pour out all the beer equally into cups for both sides on a large table. Each man gets 2 pukes. Second one he’s out and the next is in. Whomever finishes or whichever team has has less cups at the last man’s second puke wins. It’s a sporting event for the ages.
Otto is my dog. Recognize.
I had 9 beer, 3 Smirnoff Ice and 2 bloody mary’s today during a client golf outing.
I’m sure that’s a game, right?
Right?
Oh shit I’m an alcoholic.
Alright, I’m taking:
the movie “Drinking Games” that has a drinking game version where you can play along with the movie.
Categories
I Never (because seriously, only pussies call it “Never Have I Ever”)
Also, Alex, I can out drink you… and your frat.
So can my sister… she can also beat your ass in flip cup.
The dumpster story reminds me of another story…
2 of my cousins, while in high school , threw a party in their parents house, as high schoolers are want to do, and they successfully got away with throwing a party… as they were cleaning up, they continued to drink and smoke pot…
So one of my cousins, in his infinite wisdom, drives to a dumpster to get rid of all the cans, bottles, and cups. He is exceedingly wasted. He manages to throw everything into the dumpster, and when I say everything, I include his keys with that.
So there stands an 18 year old, stoned, drunk kid at 2am, with his keys in the dumpster, and he does the only logical thing, and climbs in after them. Unfortunately the dumpster is too deep for him to get out of.
So he gets trapped in a dumpster… has to call his brother, who comes and gets him out… I dont think he even managed to find his keys.
otto man is a genius for taking caps.
Caps is the scarlett johansson of drinking games.
And beer pong is like the sarah shahi, but hotter.
And don’t tell me that beer pong is called beirut, fuck that. I’m not naming possibly the best drinking game ever after a shitty lebanese city full of sand, shit, bullets, and bombs.
OK… no critiquing anyone’s drinking skills. Whatever… we all have our drinking story moments. Mine ended w/ me running home, clotheslining myself w/ a metal pole sticking out of a dumpster I didn’t see… not remembering the next morning (having to be told by my roommate’s sober boyfriend who was walking home with us why my collarbone hurt and I couldn’t lift my arm), and having to call the student health center to find out how long my tetanus shot was good for.
Back to drinking games: Pub golf.
Pair up, or go single, it doesn’t matter. Go on a bar crawl to 9 or 18 bars, depending on your level of intensity. At each bar, there is a “par” set. For example, drink a Guiness in 3 sips/lift of the glass. Like golf, you gain points if you go over. If you go under, lose points. If someone on your team pukes during the night, add a point. If both members of the team do a shot at a specific bar along with their par assignment, subtract a point (no more than one mulligan shot per bar). Have a good time.
Otto, my friend-
Allow me to quote some of the gems you have given us today:
“There’s a general rule of thumb that all ladies understand — less talk means more cock…Third, since you asked, I’m 6’3″ and 220 lbs.”
Your penchant for irony is uncanny.
“I’m a grown man, 34 years old, with a fairly intense full-time job.”
I think the emphasis should be on “fairly intense,” considering the amount of postings you have put up to defend your drinking abilities on this “fairly intense” work day.
“Also, as a grown-up, I don’t give a flying fuck what you think about my drinking abilities.”
Surely you don’t give a “flying fuck.” You’re a grown man! No need to defend your drinking abilities in one of your 17 daily posts during your “fairly intense” work day, am I right?
“I can’t believe I’m still talking about this. I really don’t care if you believe me.”
We all can see that you don’t care, Otto. Clearly its been a “fairly intense” work day, you should go home enjoy 13 Makers on the rocks to reward yourself for all the hard work.
PS – bluehose:
Stealing the term schrutebag, very clever. Also, wishing death upon someone for calling you a pussy shows you were obviously not emotionally affected in the least. Wipe your tears away, bluehose, its all in good fun.
categories: it was a safe bet someone would get laid after that one
AnalRapist: The Bismark was doomed by 6 airplanes, not the entire British Navy.
BTW, I’m sure my ex could outdrink you all. She was 5’2″, 105, and used to do beer bongs of White Zinfandel. I respectfully bow out to her expertise.
NBA rookie/sophomore game:
Drink a shot of beer for every dunk. Double-shots for dunks by white guys.
David Lee killed us this year.
You say you puked halfway through a power hour, and then claim that you actually puked halfway through a century. Which means you still failed to do a power hour. Do the math.
Hi. I’m a grown man, 34 years old, with a fairly intense full-time job, a wife, and a child on the way.
As the above description might make clear, I haven’t actually played any of these games in well over a decade. When someone said “a shot of beer a minute for an hour,” I thought that was a good fit, only to be reminded later that I had, in fact, done the Century Club and not the Power Hour.
Also, as a grown-up, I don’t give a flying fuck what you think about my drinking abilities. I did puke midway through the Century Club, and I did drink thirteen Maker’s in a row. One came when I was eighteen, another over a decade later. I’d like to think my game had improved a little.
I can’t believe I’m still talking about this. I really don’t care if you believe me. And I really can’t believe you care enough about an anonymous stranger’s drinking habits and history to demand that the record be set straight.
The fact that you give a shit about this is simultaneously hilarious and sad, like the suicide of a clown.
I sure do miss me some football.
Ah, the Drinking Gestapo has finally arrived. Otto, we’ll rescue you from lockup Monday.
In the meantime, Happy Hour calls. I’ll be drinking pure grain alcohol with a rubbing alcohol kicker just so no one calls me a pussy or chastises my drinking ability and the connection it holds with my actual manhood and/or libido.
Peace, I’m outta here.
Otto Man:
Dude, come on.
You say you puked halfway through a power hour, and then claim that you actually puked halfway through a century. Which means you still failed to do a power hour. Do the math.
I don’t care what conditions there were for the failure. If you puke halfway through a century, you cannot stomach 6 makers on the rocks, let alone 13.
It’s one thing if you can’t hold your liquor – that’s fine. But don’t try to lie about it and then come up with bullshit about how you “can’t get drunk”.
It always amazes me how someone could get that angry because they think they can drink more than someone else.
Yep. They always seem to be the type who tries to prove their manhood by holding their hand over a flame.
Or, in the frat scene, talking about how big their dick is. There’s a general rule of thumb that all ladies understand — less talk means more cock.
Alex
There is always one douche bag in the crowd isn’t there? In fact, you may be more of a schrute bag.
One day, you will meet someone who can drink more than you and I sincerely hope on that day, you die of alcohol poisoning.
Further, as I stated above, I am a puker. Always have been, always will be. However, I always continue on. If that makes me a pussy, so be it. Puke and rally, schrutebag. Puke and rally.
No, no, no. My need to get shitfaced is still with me. Unfortunately it involves actual drinks now, as opposed to vodka and whatever is in my mini-fridge. It’s also called alcoholism as opposed to a social or mixer or binge-drinking.
Sigh.
Fourth, fuck you.
And fifth, fuck you.
HAHAHAHA. I kept thinking about that Jay-Z track. Fuck you pay me. Fuck You Pay Me. FUCK.YOU.PAY.ME
It always amazes me how someone could get that angry because they think they can drink more than someone else. College days swiftly pass and for most of us so does our need to get that shitfaced. But the stories last us a lifetime.
Keep em going fellas.
And the tap water story is pure genius.
Haha… I’m glad you can appreciate that advice.
NEVER play a rules based game with a sober person, you will end up with someone shitting themself.
farmacy, I have read this many times now, and each time I like it a little bit more. True greatness.
please forvie me for not spelling it too.
I apologize.
Haha… I think we are all legendary in our own minds…
I think my favorite “way to drunk” story is when I visited my sister at Colby, and her basketball friends had gotten a prefrosh WAY to drunk… the kids was a senior in high school trying to keep up with Juniors in college… it was ugly.
So he was demanding more to drink, and the Colby guys realized that him going to the hospital wasn’t a funny way to end the night… so finally one of them looks him square in the eye and say “Listen, we rigged up the sink in the bathroom, and the BLUE tap [cold water] dispense straight vodka… go pour yourself a glass”… so the kid goes and pours himself a glass, and all of them are pretending to not what him to drink it… he gets this HUGE shit eating grin on his face, and chugs it… they celebrate, and challenge him to do it again… and again, and again… finally the kid drinks about a gallon of water, and they let him go and pass out…
I still have his proud grin etched in my memory, as he thought he was so impressive… and we didn’t have to go to the hospital, which was nice.
Is that a legendary drinking story?
One Halloween began with asshole and ended the next morning with one of the guys waking up in the homeless shelter wearing nothing but a speedo.
Another night began with three-man and ended with a friend rushing late to work the next day, only to be told by his boss that he should go to the bathroom and wash up. Once inside, he found that someone had written “I DO BONG HITS” on his face in magic marker.
Those may not be legendary, but I sure like remembering them.
http://www.amazon.com/Elements-Drinko-Shot-Game/dp/B000EOZOK8/ref=sr_1_8/102-9872232-1417757?ie=UTF8&s=home-garden&qid=1180727938&sr=8-8
This is my next draft pick, BTW.
It’s Plinko but for booze.
I had a friend shit himself on spring break due to a gravity bong and a long game of Kings with one sober person… (NEVER play a rules based game with a sober person, you will end up with someone shitting themself).
Is that a legendary drinking story?
In that case, I’ll need to pick up some Hefty bags.
No, I won’t.
(Frown)
+1, humorless moron.
Honestly, the best drinking games are any where you make people do any random action… the best one I played is tentatively named “the chicken game”, you make “chicken glasses” with your hands (OK symbol turned into glass on your face)…First player starts with “Bawk” and points their hand in a direction. “Bawk” and gesturing with your hand moves action to the same direction, “Bawk Bawk” and gesturing with your correct hand moves action to the opposite direction, grabbing both ear and yelling “Peck Peck” skips the next person and keeps the order, and “Cockadoodle-Doo” (yelled) and pointing at someone moves the action to them… it can be rejected with a “Fuck You” and a point back, and it is the “Cockadoodle Doo” callers turn again, with the same direction going.
Mess up and you drink and start the next round.
it’s not hard, until you’ve had a few drinks… then it just gets harder and funnier.
Burnsy, tonight at the bar, I will buy a cute girl a drink and hope through some karmic action a similarly cute girl sleeps with you tonight. Don’t be a fool, wrap your tool.
ok, before i make my pick i am obligated to say the following things:
1)my college was cooler than your college
2)i can drink more alcohol than you
3)my drinking game involves a legendary story that may or may not have actually happened
did i miss anything or does that cover it all?
oh yeah, and my pick is the final four challenge, one shot of beer for every ball that goes through the hoop during the final four. good times.
To go off on a mild tangent, what’s interesting to me is how drinking games change from frat house to frat house (or dorm room in my case, as I didn’t bother pledging)… and from school to school… there are almost as many different sets of rules for the same drinking games as there all colleges/frats that claim to be the source material for Animal House. [Even my dad, who was an SAE at Tulane, claims his frat is an influence on the movie (they had their own D-day)]
Done and done.
@ farmacy:
Thanks brother, and I ain’t picky so it’ll just be a Miller Lite.
I’ll also draft the Simpsons drinking game and trade it to Otto for future draft picks.
I call the Goodfellas drinking game. That’s where you drink every time they say “fuck”. It’s important that the rule is short and easy to remember because you’re going to be drinking a lot.
I love how some guys get so incredibly defensive on drinking game names.
Agreed.
The last time I had an argument about a drinking game, I was 19. Get a life, Jim Bob.
You have to be the biggest pussies to ever play a drinking game. Never finished a power-hour without puking? Or never finished period? Are you fucking 5’3″ or twelve years old or something? MAN THE FUCK UP AND LEARN HOW TO DRINK.
First of all, Alex, I said I puked (a little) in the middle of Century Club and then, without missing a beat, made the next shot and every one after that. There’s an asterisk next to the stat, but I made it.
Second, we did it fifteen minutes after we rolled out of an all-you-dare-eat pizza buffet. Not the best planning.
Third, since you asked, I’m 6’3″ and 220 lbs. I’ve pretty much given up drinking out because it’s virtually impossible for me to get drunk. The last time I booted was 2001, when I consumed thirteen straight Maker’s on the rocks.
Fourth, fuck you.
And fifth, fuck you.
Burnsy, buy yourself a beer, and pretend like I paid for it.
And Alex, settle down. It’s a hypothetical mock draft for drinking games. Save the fratboy talk for the dude flipping quarters across the table from you.
I love how some guys get so incredibly defensive on drinking game names. If you need me, I’ll be at the bar talking to girls, getting drunk and going home with the fat friend.
Eh… people who don’t have a tolerance for booze don’t bother me… I wish I didn’t have a tolerance, but back in college I was 300lbs and could drink anyone under a table… it’s just expensive. (Well, I did once win $100 drinking a half a handle of rum in 2 minutes… with no vomitting)
People who mock others alcohol tolerance are generally not the most hardcore of drinkers… I’d rather drink with someone who can’t drink much but can handle it, than someone who thinks they can drink alot, but not handle it.
Survivor Flip Cup:
Just like regular flip cup, only the losing team at the end of each round has to vote off a player. The catch? The exiled player’s cup remains, and someone has to drink+flip it. One of my frat brothers once won five straight rounds as the last man standing (5 on 1, 4 on 1, etc), it was legendary.
Waking up out of jail is the only drinking game I’ll ever need.
Pass-out.
http://www.prankplace.com/dh_passout.htm
Although I have never commented before, I am a religious reader of the KSK weekly commenter drafts, and enjoy them immensely.
Yet never has anything been said so inane/vagina-like that has prompted me to post. Until now.
TO: “ottoman” and “bluehose”
You have to be the biggest pussies to ever play a drinking game. Never finished a power-hour without puking? Or never finished period? Are you fucking 5’3″ or twelve years old or something? MAN THE FUCK UP AND LEARN HOW TO DRINK.
You are both a serious disgrace to drinking gamers worldwide. I feel embarrassed for you.
Jason, thanks for setting these bitch-ass drinkers straight.
dsanchez: Your rant leads me to believe you are the type of guy to wake up with a sore ass and a new friend every time you go out drinking.
boat race
@BDD you sir have confirmed your genius. Boat race is the drinking game of ruggers everywhere and taught me how to gulp beer REALLY FAST.
Do they not play Three Man in the US? it’s standard. you learn that one first at boarding school in canada.
Opinion: games where you have to watch tv/ movies/ state of the union addresses/ etc. are not games. they are drinking while watching tv. Bor.Ing. and lame.
good call on the india poker. Its a great way to get drunk in 20 minutes.
How about Towers? Anyone?
Whoops – forgot the name of the game – it’s called “Think While you Drink”.
My bad. Happy Hour starts early on the east coast.
It is similar to the Cosby Show game. One person starts by saying a famous person, say “George Washington”. The next person drinks until they can come up with the name of a famous person whose first name starts with “W” – Washington’s last name. Goes around in a circle until everyone is drunk enought to go out.
Go Blue!
Beer Russian Roulette is always fun. You don’t get really drunk, but you can thoroughly torment your friends. Plus, you get to quote the scene from The Deer Hunter like 400 times.
MAO!!! DI DI MAO!!!
http://www.webtender.com/handbook/games/russian-beer-roulette.game
anyone who vomits during power hour is a bitch. Also, fuck the name beirut or whatever you call it. how gives a shit what someone calls it. potato patato doesn’t mean shit. I still call it beer pong not beirut and you can kiss my ass if that bothers you.
also for the record the only acceptable picks should have been asshole, beer pong ( beirut for the gays), four kings, mushroom cloud, power hour, and drinking to certain phrases in the state of the union all other games are queer.
Not a drinking game per se, but an amazing time nonetheless.
Waking Up in the Hood
I like to play drink your ass off all night and hope you don’t get fired the next day for showing up late and stinking like booze.
That’s my favorite game.
@ken dynamo: bet your liver is fantastic
May I also suggest SoCo Hold ‘Em, it’s pretty basic, shots of SoCo are what you bet. The max per hand is 2, 4 people will finish a handle of 100 proof SoCo in less than an hour.
Shoulders is a good time as well.
Note: I’m assuming the draft has devolved into people just throwing out random drinking games. Correct me if I am wrong.
fuck i miss college.
I created a Big Lebowski Drinking game in college. (I flirted with a “every fuck = a drink” rule, but I didn’t like the taste of charcoal nor did I particularly care for the hospital across the street). Instead the rules are as follows:
Every time someone says the word dude: Drink
Every time Brandt calls the Dude Mr. Lebowski: Drink
Everytime they mention the rug: Drink
Everytime Walter tells Donny to Shut the Fuck Up: Drink
Everytime the Dude is either drinking or getting high: Drink
During all Jesus rants: Chug
WHen the dude says “The Dude abides” finish what you have left.
I always passed out with a beer in one hand, with my other arms around an oversized jug of pretzel rods…good times had by all.
The Purple Rain drinking game.
My friends and I created this game last year on our inaugural Purple Rain night to celebrate Prince’s birthday. It’s fairly simple. Put on the movie and drink when:
1. There is an exterior shot of First Avenue.
2. The fake backstage area of First Avenue is shown (it so doesn’t look like that in real life).
3. Someone calls Prince “The Kid.”
You can use your drink of choice, but it’s much more fun if you drink Purple Rain-flavored Mad Dog. And by fun, I mean horrible.
tough draft get here late… at least I learned some cool games.
I like bar olympics… the events:
Darts
Pool
Foos Ball
Beirut (yeah there are bars that have tables)
Golden Tee or Videogame Trvia
Loser buys the pitcher and drinks a shot.