"I Done Soiled My Britches!"
Thanksgiving isn’t just about the NFL. All across the nation, Turkey Day is one of the biggest days in high school football. Rivalry games, playoff games and championship games are often played early on Thanksgiving, so that millions of the high school football players that come out on the losing end of things will contemplate suicide during the bird carving.
If you were watching SportsCenter back in 1994, you may remember these highlights from the Plano East-John Tyler game. Plano East trailed in this game 41-13 with just under three minutes to go. What happened next is the kind of thing that happens in one out of every one billion football games, if that. And, if it ever happens again, it probably won’t be presided over by two of the biggest redneck, stereotype-justifying yokel announcers you’ll ever hear. If you haven’t seen this clip, take a deep breath. It’s my favorite sports highlight ever. Enjoy.
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November 25th, 2006 at 12:04 pm
Good gosh almighty, stop me before I blitz again!
November 25th, 2006 at 12:17 pm
that would suck
November 25th, 2006 at 12:51 pm
That is, in fact the greatest thing I’ve ever seen.
I’m pretty sure at least one of those announcers, if not somehow both, is Terry Bradshaw.
November 25th, 2006 at 1:25 pm
Not gonna lie, I wanted to throw up a little too.
November 25th, 2006 at 1:28 pm
Uh, that was fucking amazing.
November 25th, 2006 at 1:45 pm
awful tackling. worse announcing. But very impressive
November 25th, 2006 at 1:54 pm
Wow, that was insane. And sad to see both teams tackle like Pop Warner squads.
I think the announcing team was Terry Bradshaw and stuttering Mel Tillis, reprising their buddy roles from “Cannonball Run.”
November 25th, 2006 at 2:09 pm
DId that moron actually say “dad gummit”? Classy announcing team. Is it me, or did that one that kept screaming sound like someone was sucking his dick with all the “oh babies” coming out of his piehole.
November 25th, 2006 at 2:20 pm
I’m surrounded by more babies than an Ashanti song Oh baby
November 25th, 2006 at 2:46 pm
Great vid, that was f’ing funny.
Perhaps also te most biased announcers ever?
November 25th, 2006 at 3:03 pm
Good God Aw-mighty, if the Greeks had written tragic sports plays, that would be Oedious Rex.
November 25th, 2006 at 3:51 pm
Here is a retrospective — the last 48 points in this game were scored without John Tyler’s offense taking the field.
November 25th, 2006 at 4:08 pm
Great God Almighty, that’s the worst dad-gum announcing I’ve ever heard. No amount of positive thinking could make the audio from that clip any better. I feel like I just wet my britches, and I’m gonna be sick.
Boy howdy.
November 25th, 2006 at 4:41 pm
I may be just a tad touched in the head, but I feel adamant that that clip needs a little more…..redneck in it. If only they could have stuffed their mouths with a metric ton of chaw, said “git-er-DUN” before every play, and ran onto the field to line dance to “Achy Breaky Heart” after the game ended.
That would be even more impressive than the game itself.
November 25th, 2006 at 5:00 pm
I second J.L. — it could have only been made better by going into the future and having Larry the Cable Guy as the color commentator.
But still, awesome.
November 25th, 2006 at 5:03 pm
They broke the cardinal rule of sports fans everywhere. You never call for the celebratory Oreos until the last second ticks off the clock. Amateurs.
November 25th, 2006 at 8:48 pm
I may be from the South, but at least I’m not from Texas, dad-gummit.
November 25th, 2006 at 9:23 pm
i’m with UM up there…at least one of those guys worked at a used ‘Lac dealership back in Plano, hence his innate disgust and desire to wretch. That Used Car Manager was a total ‘Alabama porch monkey’…his words…not mine.
That’s some fucked up vid, though. Plano must have had a very hard week of practice after Thanksgiving.
November 25th, 2006 at 10:24 pm
hah, Plano East was one of my rival high schools. I remember hearing about that game.
November 26th, 2006 at 7:42 am
That was an incredible ending and probably the most improbable come back I’ve ever seen or heard. Hot damn.
November 26th, 2006 at 10:21 am
Until the last ten seconds, that’s a pretty good clip, especially “I done wet mah britches.” But the final return brings it all together magically. Great stuff.
November 26th, 2006 at 7:07 pm
I believe one of those announcers played an announcer in the football movie with the Dawson’s Creek kid (the name of which escapes me for some reason). And I think I sat near him in more than one media booth when I was covering Texas high school sports after college. In fact, I think I was at the game before that Plano East game at Texas Stadium, but left before it started. Pretty stupid, in retrospect.
November 26th, 2006 at 7:14 pm
How pathetic is this:
jmw, you’re thinking of Varsity Blues “starring” James Van Der Beek.
Now if all of you will excuse me, I’ll go slap myself now.
November 27th, 2006 at 3:13 am
sadly enough, both the announcers were the ones in Varsity Blues… gotta love me some Amy Smarth though. but even worse, they both made the late night circuit rounds (Leno/Letterman) after those highlights got national media attention.
November 27th, 2006 at 2:23 pm
Sweet. John Tyler HS was our hated cross-town rivals. And, yes, we are CUUUUUUUUN-TREE!
November 27th, 2006 at 7:20 pm
you are inbred, too.
word verification: tacuug
The orc warrior in the soon to be produced World of Warcraft movie.
November 28th, 2006 at 2:01 am
I think i am gonna be sick…well, at least youre not crying like Terry Bradshaw #2.