Will Leitch: A Day In the Life
I read the news today oh, boy About a lucky man who made the grade
Will Leitch, our Patron Saint of the Blogosphere, is taking a deserved day off following the Cardinals’ World Series victory. A lot of people (losers and/or stalkers) have been wondering how a guy could possibly tear himself away from his passion, and they’ve wondered how he’ll fill the time. Once again KSK is here with all the answers to questions that you’re too shy to ask. Let’s all take a peek into a day off in the life of a loser.
To Do List
- Read KSK, attempt to comprehend the brilliance
- Find out how much Scott Spiezio made this season, convince Denton to double it
- Sodomize that guy from Can’t Stop the Bleeding
- Go see Little Children, wonder how it was greenlit before Life As a Loser
- Call Tom Perrotta, ask him to reimburse 2 hours of life and $10
- Find out who does Colin Meloy’s hair
- Check in on Deadspin’s progress, demand more money from Gawker
- Pose in front of some bricks in case somebody out there is taking pictures
- Steal Bill Simmons’ address book, tear out the page marked “Kimmel, Jimmy”
- Pay somebody to kick Kimmel’s ass
- Update shrine to Andy Rooney
- Dance like nobody is watching you, destroy the video evidence this time
- Decide between Smells Like Teen Spirit and On a Plane for next book title
- Sunbathing in Central Park with ARod
- Prepare Mayoral campaign for Mattoon, Illinois
Hell, who needs Deadspin when you’ve got all of that to take care of in a single day. What else do you think Mr. Leitch might be doing today? Let us know in the comments.
Tags: Uncategorized
October 31st, 2006 at 3:12 pm
7:30am:
Snooze
8:00am - 9:30am:
Watch last out of WS over and over and over….
9:30am - 2:30pm:
Shari yells at him to get a real job and stop hanging out with thes e freaks
2:30pm - 4:30pm
Check Deadspin constantly to see if he is mentioned in comments. Smoke a pack of Marlboros
4:30pm - 9:30pm
Shari yells at him to get a real job and stop hanging out with thes e freaks
9:30pm - 12:00am
Watch last out of WS over and over and over….
October 31st, 2006 at 3:19 pm
Finally takes the time to see how he looks with feathered bangs.
October 31st, 2006 at 3:21 pm
Orders a Nutty Buddy to prepare for his next meeting with a Deadspin commenter
October 31st, 2006 at 3:39 pm
Dresses up as a Bee from a Blind Melon video for Halloween and goes around screaming, “I’m Will Leitch, bitch! Gimme some candy!”
October 31st, 2006 at 3:43 pm
your dudeness- i can actually picture that in my mind…and the view is goooood
October 31st, 2006 at 4:47 pm
Make sure he’s got a clean white t-shirt and jeans to go with the leather jacket for his Arthur Fonzarelli Halloween costume.