Thanks to the ever-expanding NFL schedule, the playoffs now stretch almost clear into Valentine’s Day. Because of the proximity between the two big dates, we saw a number of NFL figures using favorite holiday treats to convey less than pleasant news. Here are some of the confections we saw being exchanged during Super Bowl weekend:

Players union Executive Director DeMaurice Smith was seen giving these away to players by the fistful over the weekend…

I’d wonder about anyone who didn’t want to send one these to Pete Townshend…

I don’t particularly care whether or not the losing team in the Super Bowl races out to midfield to shake the hands and grab the dicks of the winners. Lack of sportsmanship nonsense provides nothing but fodder for the sanctimonious sports media news hole. We jumped on Belichick’s snub two years ago because it was yet another knifetwist after the Patriots Super Bowl loss. What irks me is the double standard shown by the same moralizing commentators who heaped scorn on Belichick for racing off the field, while for Peyton Manning they supply only fawning remarks about his competitive spirit and willingness to defer the spotlight to the Saints. BS – they’re both spiteful asswipes who hate to lose and don’t want the opportunity for more photo ops of them displaying dejection on the playing field. I don’t care if Belichick did it with a second on the clock or that Peyton did some make-up sexting with Drew Brees later to atone for it. The principle remains the same.

Also:

Oh, dear God no. It’s the offseason again. That endless stretch of seven months with hardly any real football in sight. You’re hurt. You’re angry. You’re hateful. We understand. At KSK, hating things is what we do best. Which is why we have our perennial offseason series: THIS WEEK IN FU. This week: M*A*S*H.

Read the rest of this entry »

Note: Drew is unavailable today, so I’ll be tackling PK duties this week.

When we last left wistful reader Peter King, he was extolling the virtues of Brookline Booksmith, despite his fondness for the Kindle. So what about this week? Will Peter be satisfied with his stay at the Doral Resort and Spa? Will he be disappointed by South Florida’s lackluster support of their hometown hockey team? Read on.

Read the rest of this entry »

Mmmmm-MMM! Here, try this. It’s delicious! No, it’s okay: there’s plenty for everyone. This feast will last all day, my friends.

(By the way, everyone I watched the game with was rooting for the Saints, and we were all actually disappointed at the Colts’ red zone failure with 55 seconds left. We were really savoring the desperation.)

[image via]

Oh, how we’d missed you.

(image via)

Pregame: Drunk Colts fan tails Saints fans on the upper concourse, serenading them with the makeshift parody “When the Saints Go Crawling Home”

Postgame: Drunk Saints fan attempts to reunite taunting banner made by Colts fan with its owner. I am not sure he is actually committed to this endeavor.

Don’t forget to console Monkey Business on Battleship Manning. Be sure to be succinct. He so often is with us.

And a sincere congratulations to the Who Datters. Now we can all hate you.

I could see those sombreros being hindrance once the game begins. But you know how the Mexicans love the Breesus.

All week, it seemed that the Saints fans would easily overwhelm the fat humps in the stands today, but we failed to account that each fanbase would reflect the character of their hometown. The Who Datters showed up early in the week and partied late into the nights. The Colts fans showed up yesterday and in many cases this morning. Efficient, focused and obscenely obese. Very, very obese. Also, someone should have told them the jersey and khaki shorts look wasn’t a requirement for admission.

For those around, I am liveblogging this game – just not for KSK. Swing by The Sporting Blog if you want to follow along. Be advised that language restrictions are considerably more strict around those parts, and fewer comments will get through as Chris Littmann and I actually have to pay close attention to the proceedings and work. Should the paucity of dick jokes not gibe with your live blogging tastes, there’s always the comment section here. Or, y’know, you could talk to the other people at your party.

Miami is of course the place to be this week, with locals and visitors taking advantage of the sun and fun before tonight’s spectacle. Unlike our own Mr. Ape we are unable to experience the scene first hand, so instead here’s a brief photo tour of goings on in south Florida.

Read the rest of this entry »